She won’t stop blowing raspberries

[Somanymilesaway]

Dd, 3.

She’s always been fairly ‘Spirited’ but is wild at the moment. Won’t stop blowing raspberries, talking about bums and poo and laughing when I tell her off,
Is this normal? Feeling like I’m losing control, what can I do? Driving me insane

She's 3, not 23.
Why are you telling her off? You have to remember that little kids find things like that hilarious.
Just ignore it and carry on with what you were doing.

That sounds like fairly normal 3yo behaviour tbh.

Ignore her when she does these things.

Shes 3 and getting a reaction.

It's normal and a normal response to your reaction

It's normal 3 year old behaviour. Lots of kids talk about bums/poo/wee and find it hilarious, even when older than 3!

Lol if the other person in question wasn't 3 I'd wonder if this was a reverse.

She’s doing it because you’re over reacting. Stop reacting, pretend you haven’t noticed. I suspect you’ve got into some negative dynamics and instead make having fun and behaving the route to lots of attention

Completely normal. My 8 yo still has a scatological sense of humour. If you don't like it ignore it.

5 & 6 here and bum and poo talk still going strong. Escalating if anything.

Realise it’s normal behaviour etc regarding the poo and bum talk, we largely ignore it all, but the raspberry blowing is constant, like she can’t stop. Mainly she’s out of control and laughs when told off.
I’m telling her off as today she was jumping (or attempting to jump off the bed constantly and throwing clothes everywhere etc etc. Do I just ignore all that

Definitely laugh along / and /or ignore
Offer a tissue for a soggy chin if needed
As soon as it’s not an issue for you she’ll likely tone it down
Focus on positive interactions with her instead

@SaltySheepdog What do you mean? We have lots of fun, but recently, she’s a nightmare

@CoffeeNeeded2019 Lots of positivity and love/cuddles etc and bum/poo talk is just daft and doesn’t bother me. It’s more the being crazy-throwing things etc, then when I tell her no, she blows the raspberries and laughs, doesn’t listen to a word I say. She starts nursery in September and I imagine they wouldn’t love that

Redirect her. She seems bored and looking for connection with you which she gets when you speak to her directly -telling her off.

Show her how to put the clothes away.

Say to her I see you have lots of energy - can you jump over this toy (on the floor) or do some jumping jacks? Give her power by offering an appropriate choice. Calmly show her the right way to behave. Don't focus on telling her off.

Saying not to do something is like saying don't think of a pink elephant.

The clothes throwing is annoying (especially when they’re freshly ironed!)
But again I’d dry& refocus
Where is it ok for her to jump if she wants to jump?

Can you take the sofa cushions off for her to use? Or do you have a trampoline?
Or is the bed ok with the clothes moved ?
Set the boundaries so she’s safe but try and be fair to her & what she’s choosing to do otherwise you’ll spend all day battling which is no fun for either of you !

You sound like you’re going head to head with her a lot resulting in challenging behaviour to cause a reaction from you. It’s become a battle of the wills, your will against hers but best choose your battles. Try distraction or ignoring poor behaviour in the first place. Humour can also be used to manage poor behaviour

If you’re talking to her and she starts with the noises you put on a very stern expression and say firmly but without emotion “oh no, we don’t make noises like that when someone is talking to us. We listen nicely.” and when she does it again just keep repeating it in a very dull way so she’s not getting any drama or fun of making you cross. “What do we do when someone is talking to us? We listen nicely without any noises”.

And when she does listen nicely even for a second you make a big smiling deal of it. You can also say “ok, I’ve said what I needed to say to you, now you can go and be silly!” at the end. Don’t just always be telling her what not to do, make sure to explicitly teach what she should be doing. Eg “when clothes are dry and ironed we must put them away so they don’t get creased” not “stop throwing clothes around!” (Although this is how you feel).

Think infinitely patient infant teacher rather than manically positive CBeebies person.

Take her out lots when she gets physical, she probably needs to run round outside in the park to let off some steam

She’s doing it because you’re over reacting. Stop reacting, pretend you haven’t noticed.

I don't think this works for all DC. I tried it with DS but since his friends were reinforcing the behaviour, me ignoring it only taught him there was no negative consequence. As soon as I started reacting with a sharp "No" and physically removed him from whatever he was doing when he was screaming "POO" or blowing big wet spitty raspberries, he eased off.

However he and his friends still talk about poo endlessly at age 6. We all have our interests I suppose.

Poo talk, bum talk, blowing raspberries - all fairly standard 3yr old humour. Ignore as if she hadn't said it or blown a raspberry, but don't respond to requests unless they are asked sensibly and politely. She's getting a lot of attention with her poo etc talk, stop feeding the habit.

With regard to laughing, jumping on the bed, throwing clothes around - she sounds a bit bored - what do you do during the day, is she good at playing by herself when you have to do other things? Do you help her set up an activity so she has something to do if you are busy? Does she get plenty of exercise - she sounds as if she has a lot of energy to use up.

As for laughing and being defiant - on the whole children prefer to please you. Talk to her when she's not being silly about the behaviour you would like - and tell her if she e g does things the first time she's asked, or stops being silly the first time she is asked you will be very pleased - and if she does then praise her.
Be specific in what you expect from her, - don't say things like 'stop being naughty' say 'don't throw your clothes on the floor' and make her tidy them up. Thank her when she does something helpful, praise her if she is playing nicely.

It sounds like you've never met a 3 year old before ...

Buy the book with no pictures. It won’t solve the problem at all but she will live the book.

My 4 year old is challenging at the moment too, I suspect partly due to the lack of routine that comes with it being summer holidays. I take him out as much as possible for stimulation and exercise and just for a bit of peace and quiet and comfort myself that schools back in a few weeks.

This is when it’s nap time mainly. We go out everyday and if not are playing lots in the pool and garden.
I’ve said calmly time and time again about blowing raspberries not being nice/ignoring/saying oh that’s a silly noise etc..but it’s constant recently
We’re connected all day long as are always together and she never wants to play alone. She’s also been hitting recently, so we’ve talked lots about using nice hands and how it hurts etc. I don’t know, she’s like a different child the last few months, it’s hard

@melj1213 ? Her behaviour is becoming out of control now