Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should I buy a drum kit when I live in a SD house?

116 replies

Drumkitsituation · 02/08/2021 18:37

The whole question is in the title really but to add a little more detail.....

I have recently fallen back in love with playing the drums after a twenty year break. I’m a forty year old mum of 2, and it feels hugely amazing to be doing something new and playful and not child or goal orientated.

I live in a semi detached house, neighbours are nice, they are currently WFH since pandemic, not sure of their long terms plans. They have grown up children.

I want a drum kit. The electronic one I play on in lessons is about 6k worth of stuff but according to my teacher I can get an entry level electronic one for about £500.

However, I want a real one, preferably a Pearl export like the one I had as a teenager! I can get a second hand one of these for £300 and wouldn’t want or need to upgrade that.

I’d probably play for an hour or so 4 ish times a week whilst the kids are at school/in afternoon at weekends.

The only room we could fit it in would be a room adjoining their house on the ground floor.

The houses are 30s, robust, thick walls, neither of us can really hear the other day to day.

YANBU - it’s your house, get the drum kit you want

YABU - selfish, think of your neighbours, save up for the electronic

Thanks

OP posts:
LemonViolet · 02/08/2021 19:48

Electric kit with headphones, only acceptable way, sorry. At least then you can play all hours, whenever you fancy.

ActonSquirrel · 02/08/2021 19:50

Lots of people still are wfh and it is very disruptive to constant crap drumming

Anoisagusaris · 02/08/2021 19:50

I thought this was going to be a tongue-in-cheek lighthearted question! Can’t believe you are serious.

tigger1001 · 02/08/2021 19:50

@SheldonesqueTheBstard

So many interesting posts today. And not one with a posting history.

If my neighbour thought that drums were acceptable, then I’m sure they’d be equally accepting of bagpipes.

Have had neighbours play both in my time in my street!

The bagpipes were hard to listen to when just starting out.

Currently have two neighbours who play drums. Neither play them for extended periods and are not played at anti social times

SD1978 · 02/08/2021 19:56

If,you can fully soundproof the room, maybe. If not save up for the electric ones.

Nirnroot · 02/08/2021 19:58

Go for the electric kit with headphones, or as someone else said rent a storage unit to store and practise in.

RedMarauder · 02/08/2021 20:00

I discovered I lived next to a drummer for nearly a year when I just graduated. He practised at 11am to noon every weekday on the dot. He was good so the times I was in I wasn't bothered by his drumming. He would play whole tunes from the beginning to end. Yes he repeated them but it was the entire thing. (In fact I think he got complaints that we couldn't hear the music he was drumming to.)

One of my nephews' plays the drums plus a couple of other instruments. His parents sound proofed his room in their detached house but even then people in the neighbourhood could hear. Luckily he actually showed improvement.

One of my neighbours use to play the guitar. He never improved. So when he practised it was like torture regardless of whether he was doing sequences or a whole piece of music.

Basically if you are decent or show weekly improvement people won't be as pissed off. However if you have absolutely no talent for the instrument then your neighbours will hate you with a passion.

gogohm · 02/08/2021 20:00

Only if you put up soundproofing boards, it looks like plasterboard then you plaster on top.

MarianneUnfaithful · 02/08/2021 20:04

4 hours a week is a lot for the neighbours to listen to kit drums.

I do agree that electronic ones have to be the ‘real feel’ ones.

You don’t have to pay £6k!

www.gear4music.com/Electronic_Drum_Kit/Pearl.html

strawberry2017 · 02/08/2021 20:12

No.

AllesAusLiebe · 02/08/2021 20:13

I'm currently getting quotes for soundproofing after I (idiotically) decided that I could live in a 1930s semi without stressing out everytime I hear my neighbours. These walls are not as thick as you may think!

I wouldn't do it if you like these folks and wish for it to stay that way. Having said that, I don't see anything wrong with having an exploratory discussion first and gauging their reaction.

Abracadabra12345 · 02/08/2021 20:21

@RedHelenB

I don't think yabu. Just choose the times your neighbours are out.
They wfh. How is OP going to do that 4 times a week?
Spanielstail · 02/08/2021 20:22

No. Drum kit in a remote detached house or not at all. Our neighbour had one when we lived in a village. Had the windows open on their detached house and it drove me to distraction Angry

pinkcircustop · 02/08/2021 20:23

YABU and it would incredibly selfish of you. You need to be considerate. No matter how good you think you are, nobody else wants to hear it.

saraclara · 02/08/2021 20:26

@Bagelsandbrie

I’d cry if I was your neighbour.
Me too. It would really mess with my mental health.
Fimofriend · 02/08/2021 20:32

YABU.

modgepodge · 02/08/2021 20:33

My husband has an electric drum kit. I can hear it all over the house and the neighbours have complained (semi detatched). Even with headphones an electric one is loud. I can begin to imagine how loud a real one would be.

CreamFirstThenJamOnTop · 02/08/2021 20:34

Unfortunately I don’t think a drum kit is very reasonable in a room adjoining another house.

We live in a 30s semi and had the same dilemma….. we ended up saving for an electronic kit.

ufucoffee · 02/08/2021 20:35

I used to live in the same street as someone who played the drums. We could hear him 5 houses down and across the road. And my house was detached.

MissyGez · 02/08/2021 20:37

I lived in a semi next door to a family that played guitars, drums and flutes daily, it was awful, I did try to speak to them on numerous occasions and come to some compromise so they could still play and we could enjoy our home, they were not willing to budge and made out it was me with the issue.

It wasn't until I moved that I realised the negative impact it had on my mental health

NoYOUbekind · 02/08/2021 20:38

My best friend's DH is a professional drummer.

They moved to a detached house in the middle of a field. I would hate to live next door to him.

Zolrets · 02/08/2021 20:43

I’m going to be controversial- a few years ago I’d have said no way but my DH got a kit about 19 months ago and plays for about
45 minutes once a day. We are in a detached but not remote, however I can easily wfh with this going on. You can damp the sound down with whatever those rubber mat things are and those pillow things. It isn’t as loud as I thought it would be. He wouldn’t play all day or at odd hours. Also, it isn’t random thrashing, there is way more musicality about it than I thought when he started assembling said kit.

MrsSkylerWhite · 02/08/2021 20:44

YABU

RandomMess · 02/08/2021 20:45

Sorry you need to get electric I good kit will be about £800 they keep their value really well if you don't get a cheap one!

Eatenpig · 02/08/2021 20:47

Ours has headphones. Silent in the house. Simple

Swipe left for the next trending thread