Why can't I lose weight?! Is it my age? 😭

[HurryUpAndWait23]

Im 39.

I've never been overweight but I was always comfortable at 9st12 and when I started to push 10+ stone (around Christmas or too many summer BBQ's and wine) I'd do 5:2 or similar and the weight would come off easily, always around 2lb a week.

Now, I'm 11stone and 24.5 on the BMI and I've been trying to lose weight for months.
I've tried WW (worked very well in the past) 5:2 which was always great, and I can get down to 10st10 if I'm lucky and it goes back up again.

What the fuck is going on?! I've even stopped drinking (was drinking wine most nights, now drinking once a week and have done for about 2 months), I thought the weight would fall off then - but no!

I feel fit and well so I don't think it's a thyroid issue or anything medical.

I'm 39 soon - is it my bloody age?!

How fucking depressing if it is?!

I'm only 31 and I'm having this problem too 😩. I was so thin for years. I've had 2 kids in 3 years and am now a size 12. I have tried dieting, exercising more, not eating in the evenings. I can lose maybe a pound or 2 over a 2/3 weeks and then nothing else comes off.

I can only assume it's the slowing down of metabolism. So depressing.

Find out what your TDEE is - there are online calculators - and eat 200-400 calories less than that a day. Swap fruit for veg, especially leafy green veg which you can eat lots of to fill you up. Eat 1g of protein for each lb of your weight. Have only complex carbs. Have a moderate amount of fat.

Exercise: weight training is brilliant because you build muscle which means your body burns more calories even when you aren't doing anything. We lose muscle mass as we age too, which is one of the reasons losing weight gets harder. For women weight bearing exercise helps build bone density which is really important as we age and go through hormonal changes.

I'm 41 and struggle as well. I am stuck at 10st and need to be at 9st. I've recently started running more and have been doing resistance training for about two years.

Have you tried something like T25 (Beachbody) to get you starting to exercise? I have been using BB exercise programs religiously and look and feel better now than in my 20's (despite weight gain). I also did a couple months on Noom learning about what to eat and basically learned we need to eat foods that have lots of water (e.g. cucumber, pickles, apples, watermelon) to keep calories down but feel satisfied.

My dinner.
149 calories. How depressing.

@TolpuddleFarter what is NEAT?

I'm 39 soon - is it my bloody age?!

39? Probably not.

I’m 48. I gained over a stone over the second lockdown. I lost it all in 12 weeks by keeping to a strict 1500 calories a day… plus moving about a lot.

I also did a couple months on Noom
I briefly looked into Noom, but they seemed to focus a lot on exercise so I quickly swerved that idea.
Is that how it was for you? What were you expected to do?

If you're not kidding about about pissing yourself, you should speak to your GP. I've had three babies and weight train and run regularly. You don't need to just accept that because you've had kids.

I have exactly the same issue, op.

Fast 800 works for me. I have 2x protein shakes as meal replacements and then a meal from the fast 800 recipe book. I usually need a banana mid morning but can otherwise manage that. I was losing 2lb a week doing that after hitting 40 and an extreme metabolism slow down!

I like Freesoul vegan protein powder, only tried the chocolate flavour but it’s very nice with oat milk.

@mistermagpie

If you're not kidding about about pissing yourself, you should speak to your GP. I've had three babies and weight train and run regularly. You don't need to just accept that because you've had kids.

Yeah I really really do. I think I need physio to be honest. It's one of those things that's easy to keep forgetting.

Fast 800 works for me.

That sounds interesting - I'm about to Google this!

Just googled fast 800, do I have to buy the book? I can't be arsed to read a whole book, I just want the rules.

Yanbu
I’m 45 and do intermittent fasting. Only thing that works for me.
Google The diet doctor-Dr Jason Fung
I try to avoid bread too and keep sugar consumption low and focus on nourishment.

I've read all your posts OP, but not the whole thread.

You won't like this.

You need to exercise.

It's true that diet is the main way to manage weight BUT women especially need to combine it with exercise.

Not walks. Strenuous, high intensity cardio, ideally a mix of activities plus weights.

This means that you metabolise at a much higher rate - so the calories you use up aren't so relevant but how you continue to burn calories in the 12 hours after.

Additionally, you tone & strengthen your body which will achieve a better figure even if weight doesn't drop as much.

Finally you are protecting yourself & bones into middle and old age, it really shocks me how women after 50 are often so unaware of the need for weight-bearing exercise to protect them from falls, ensure their mobility remains etc.

You are only 39, but 40 is absolutely a flash point for this. Exercise is really important.

Also from your posts your diet sounds good. So many women however really restrict their calorie intake and suffer from poor nutrition & lack of vital food groups as a consequence.

Why do you not want to exercise? You should be able to find an exercise that energised you & makes you feel good.

@HurryUpAndWait23

Just googled fast 800, do I have to buy the book? I can't be arsed to read a whole book, I just want the rules.

I just bought the recipe book so that I had a selection of go-to meals Didn’t bother reading much beyond the intro and just followed the suggested plans. I eventually switched to protein shakes for lunch/dinner to make it much less hassle.

I'm 46, I really struggled and then went more drastic and started a keto diet which I did religiously for around seven months and lost nearly two stone. I'm on and off keto now and fluctuate my weight with 4-6 lbs depending on my eating habits.

Very depressing OP! I feel you! I’ve had a love affair with crisps all my life, only now I only have to look at a bag and I put a stone on!

Your metabolism does not slow as you age. That is a crock of shit. I hear that, along with myths like "starvation mode" still circulating on MN a lot. What does happen is that you lose muscle mass as you age. You need muscle to burn calories.

Your options are either to stay on increasingly restrictive diets the rest of your life to stay at a healthy weight that way.

OR - and this works - build muscle (through strength/resistance training) as this will help you burn more calories at rest. When you lift weights and build muscle those muscles will constantly be burning calories while at rest. Basically, as we age it is in our benefit to build muscle and get rid of the fat.

I got to 40 and had piled on 4 stone (which is a lot for my height). I started strength training with weights and instead of dieting, I bulked up the protein content of my meals and cut down on carbs a bit (not hugely). I also started having "good fats" for snacks - so nuts, full fat yoghurt, that sort of thing. You'll feel fuller for longer and it kills carb cravings (if you get those). I used to be addicted to crisps. I just don't crave them any more. I swapped chocolate bars for protein bars (the latter keep you feeling full for hours, instead of minutes).

This way I've lost the 4 stone and I never feel hungry. Not ever. And I eat a lot.

Just to add I'm a really stubborn person, and I used to come on here and read people saying this stuff and I wouldn't believe them. But they're right. I'm sorry, but the exercise people are right.

Try strength training - Joanna Soh on YouTube is great - just 20 minutes 3 times a week would make a massive difference. I don't like to think of anyone endlessly on diets. It's just miserable.

Really don't forget seeing the GP about your bladder.

I've had three vaginal births, I know how it goes, but I saw a specialist women's health physio and she was amazing. It's honestly well worth prioritising this because it opens the door to exercise for you and I'm sorry to say it, but a PP is correct - as women hit menopause it's really important to have been doing weight bearing exercise, it's beneficial for lots of things that have nothing to do with weight loss.

@EarringsandLipstick

I've read all your posts OP, but not the whole thread.

You won't like this.

You need to exercise.

It's true that diet is the main way to manage weight BUT women especially need to combine it with exercise.

Not walks. Strenuous, high intensity cardio, ideally a mix of activities plus weights.

This means that you metabolise at a much higher rate - so the calories you use up aren't so relevant but how you continue to burn calories in the 12 hours after.

Additionally, you tone & strengthen your body which will achieve a better figure even if weight doesn't drop as much.

Finally you are protecting yourself & bones into middle and old age, it really shocks me how women after 50 are often so unaware of the need for weight-bearing exercise to protect them from falls, ensure their mobility remains etc.

You are only 39, but 40 is absolutely a flash point for this. Exercise is really important.

Also from your posts your diet sounds good. So many women however really restrict their calorie intake and suffer from poor nutrition & lack of vital food groups as a consequence.

Why do you not want to exercise? You should be able to find an exercise that energised you & makes you feel good.

I'm listening.

You sound really informed.

I don't hate all exercise. I like swimming but I have scoliosis and kyphosis which makes swimming lengths painful. And I don't want to do aqua aerobics because that's the exercise I hate just while im wet.

Running is ok, at a push. But my pelvic floor is so shot, I'm worried pounding the pavement will make the situation even worse than it is. It's yet more pressure repeatedly.
I know I need to see a GP.

And cardio just sucks. I hate physics effort through exercise, I hate being hot it makes me feel dizzy. I could walk all day long, I could go up and down hills, I could happily go on the South Downs every day.
But full time work and kids makes that almost impossible (but I always do when I get the chance! It's just rare).

So all in all - strength/weights (I think I'm much happier with this than Fucking Cardio) and GP about my pant pissing.

Does anyone recommend how one goes about doing strength/weights?

I can't do the gym, so home stuff? YouTube videos?
I have a really bad back, that's the other thing (thanks kids!)

@HurryUpAndWait23

Then why are you eating high fat? That’s not what low carb is?

What? I was talking about BIWI's boot camp and it is exactly that. Low/no carb, high fats.

No it’s not, it’s fat as the highest proportion of your daily intake, which is not high fat. They are too very different things, biwi does not advocate eating a high fat diet. I’m sorry but you’ve been doing it wrong.

BIWI boot camp is LCHF

low carb high fat

You remind me of my mum, OP, she also complains about chest pains when she doesn't have wheat based carbs like bread.

It doesn't make sense to me but she is sure.

OP you need pilates and physio.

You need to address the bad back and incontinence first

What about yoga? Styles like Ashtanga are great for building physical muscle strength.