To not vacuum neighbour's car

[TheUnexpectedPickle]

I really don't think IABU but juuuuust in case...

Off work today, doing a few jobs. Decided to vacuum and clean inside of my car (which turned out to be a bigger job than I thought as I've not done it since I got the car in September 😬)

Upstairs neighbour went out as I was starting and came back as I was topping up screen wash. Said "you're doing a great job, are you ok to do mine next". I laughed, standard (not that funny but common) joke right?

Wrong. She was serious. I said I don't have time to do another car now. She asked if I can do it tomorrow as she doesn't have a hand held vacuum. I said she is welcome to borrow mind (a stick shark) but I'm back at work tomorrow. She kind of huffed and said she thought I "might like to be neighbourly" and went in.

I mean... wtf!? I've never cleaned a neighbours car. I might do DPs if he was here but only cos he'd do mine if he was doing his.

BUT

1. I've moved to a smaller town from London and obviously the vibe is a bit different, people are more friendly etc.

1. Neighbour already is suspicious of me, she had a bee in her bonnet about me not going round to introduce myself when I moved in and once we had spoken I heard her telling her husband she didn't believe me about my job and wanted to call my employer to confirm I worked for them! (She has also speculated that my baby nephew was my baby who didn't live with me and thought he'd been taken away from me, but that's another thread)

So... should I have given her car a once-over to keep the peace or should I just avoid her and her batshittery?

I've read a variation on this thread before.

@Bettytaghetti don't fret, I'm in Surrey.

Tell us your tale though!!!

She sounds unhinged. Avoid assiduously!

Surrey is no place for a woman whose kids been removed by the social & pretends to have a job to cover for illicit earnings.

I think that sums up what she thinks of you 🤨

"Sure, I'll clean your car while you clean my bathroom and mop the floor" should have been your response

Jeezus H Christ to the Hey Nonny No!
Talk about CF - cease & desist all contact unless you can feed the mad fucker tripe for your own amusement (then tell us on here! 😂). I’m thinking you should occasionally go outside with binoculars & peer at the sky, make notes & earnest phone calls pointing skyward, it’ll drive her mad.

@StevieNix

No she’s batshit

My exact thoughts.

Never do something to keep the peace, it never ends. Ever.

Hahahah it was worth a shot right. I applaud her CF ask. YANBU.

@RogueMnerHidesUnderABigHat

Ah. Just me who mis-read it as cat then? 🐾

Gobsmacking cfery

wanderers off to get eyes tested

Me too ! I was thinking eh since when is vacuuming cats a thing, especially your neighbours?!

Cat is a Londoner

I love this! Visions of your hard hissing cat 😂

Avoid, avoid and avoid!

Hand her a bucket and cloth and say she can do your windows while you vacuum her car..

you never handed over your Shark did you ? 😱

@Fluffycloudland77 yep, I get the impression that's exactly what she thinks!

It's not even a particularly posh bit of Surrey, just a bit nicer and much quieter than my London Borough Town.

I know what started it was me not coming over to introduce myself- it just didn't occur to me because im a rude cunty Londoner its not like its a little village out in the sticks. Its a medium sized town with a proper town centre, small indoor shopping Mall etc.

@SleepyMathematician she is teeny tiny so it's very funny watching her trying to be intimidating. Mind you, the dog seems suitably cowed by her!

@QueenBee52 luckily no, and I won't be!

I have a really similar neighbour. You need to say "no" firmly to all requests and suggestions, otherwise the demands will increase. If you are accused of doing anything dismiss it confidently by saying that she must have made a mistake, it couldn't have been you as you were out/having a bath/didn't live there when this happened. Hold your boundaries with hoops of steel. I wish you good fortune in the skirmishing to come.

Is she old, some older people might feel like the youngsters should help...perhaps?! Not saying you should though!!

😂 she is crazy.

That said, once you finish her car, any chance you can do mine too please? Us being on MN together and all. Thanks!

[quote TheUnexpectedPickle]@QueenBee52 luckily no, and I won't be![/quote]

Good stuff 🎉😂

I guess you are an undertaker?
I live semi rurally. Tell her nothing she is nuts. Be polite but aloof

You're in trouble now. Look out of your window at midnight. There'll be a torch lit procession of villagers. She'll be the one at the front, carrying a pitchfork.

@Bollocks980 Nah she's maybe 50ish? She owns a local gym too and is an instructor so presumably fit enough to clean her own car/has enough money to pay someone else.

The only car I have ever cleaned apart from my own is my dad's as a teenager, and he paid me 20 quid!

Tell her to fuck off.

or if you want to #BeKind - vacuum her car, pay the tax , MOT and insurance and make her a casserole.

Quote her £50.