Why do some have easy pregnancies and others don't?

[AiyaNapawithmorenaps]

Just that really.
I think about how lucky I was to never have any morning sickness or back pain or swollen ankles. I was overweight at the time of getting pregnant the second time and had only had my first twelve months before. Even running about with a toddler felt relatively easy and photos of the time show me looking happy and relaxed (sort of.) This isn't a brag honest!
My friend is already having frequent days off with sickness when she is younger and healthier than I was when I conceived my first. My other friend had morning sickness so bad she seriously considered whether she could continue the pregnancy. Do medics understand what makes some people breeze through pregnancy and not others?
With mine I found out late both times (eight weeks with number 1 and six weeks with number 2) so I can't have had much in terms of physical symptoms.
Just from anecdotal evidence, I feel there is no correlation between the lifestyle of the mother and how difficult a pregnancy you will have.

My first two pregnancies were very easy! First one I had a terrible birth, second was a doddle!
I'm 9 weeks into pregnancy number 3 and it's been hell on earth from the get go!
I do think it's just luck of the draw to be honest

I had a very straightforward pregnancy with DD and really enjoyed it, but then I had a pretty lousy birth with forceps, long labour, failed epidural. I do wonder if I got lucky though and if I ever do it again I’ll have a really hard time! My mum had two very easy pregnancies and two ELCS so I wonder if we as a family carry well but birth badly waiting for my sister to have a baby to test my theory….

One thing I have found anecdotally is that people I know who have struggled to conceive have gone on to have horrendous morning sickness, HG etc. I also find most people with morning sickness were quite slim and didn't eat much and I know that there is a link between sugar levels and morning sickness.

I had an easy pregnancy with my first, I had a horrendous pregnancy with my second. So it is luck of the draw.

Just luck of the draw, every human body is different and so reacts differently. You might catch the same cold as someone you know but have a far easier/harder time with it than they do even though you have the same thing.

There are so many different symptoms in pregnancy, even if you sail through one you might have a nightmare for the next. And agree with others that your financial and living situation can make a difference as that might impact the support you have access to.

I had one terrible pregnancy (severe preeclampsia) and one super healthy pregnancy. In my case I think it’s at least partially genetic. Women on both sides of my parent’s family have a history of gynae problems - fibroids, endo, cysts, prolapses, preeclampsia, etc. I’m currently grappling with fibroids and cysts. It’s weird - we’re all all healthy as can be otherwise - strong immune systems so we rarely get ill and even if we do we usually shake it off pretty quickly, no diabetes, allergies, heart problems…most of us don’t even wear glasses until we’re well onto our late 50s and we live long lives, but we’re slaves to our gynae problems!

I've had severe sickness and nausea with both pregnancies and honestly it's completely put me off ever wanting to do this again. I'm currently 36 weeks pregnant with DC2 and still being constantly sick about twice a day. It's exhausting. I hate food and everything smells horrible. I just can't wait to have my body and appetite back.

I was hoping my second pregnancy would be different but it's exactly the same constant sickness which is what has my mind made up about a 3rd. Never again lol 😂

A lot of my friends have easy pregnancies with very little symptoms or food aversions and I'm just so jealous of them🤣

4 more weeks to freedom! 🥳🥳

It seems really random. I had three pregnancies and three totally different experiences. One was grim, I felt like death most of the way through through exhaustion and sickness. One I wouldn't have known I was pregnant other than the big bump, no symptoms at all. One I didn't have any sickness but did have SPD and could hardly walk by about 32 weeks.

Idle wondering here with no medical knowledge at all, but sparked off by an earlier comment...

I wonder if there's any link to how close your child's DNA is to your own? I'm wondering if a foetus that more closely matches the mother's DNA might be less likely to cause the mother's body to see it as some form of "invader" and therefore not trigger body responses that would make her sick etc?

I'm sure someone will rapidly tell me that our bodies don't work this way though!

Pregnancy 1: morning sickness throughout, pre-eclampsia, EMCS

Pregnancy 2: morning sickness, SPD, EMCS under GA, I was tachycardic, baby got distressed, menconium, baby flatlined, resussed twice, some time SCBU.

Never again don’t think my body can’t handle it, I thought that after no 1 maybe my body isn’t equipped for this, but thought I’d give it another go, my cervix failed to dilate both times past 3cm which is helpful.

I've had easy and hard pregnancies. It's luck of the draw. My first (when I was thinnest and fittest) was the worst for morning sickness and spd. My last when I was oldest was worst for general tiredness but to be fair I'm
Knackered not pregnant!

Anecdotally (prepared to be told I'm completely wrong on this), I've noticed baby girls equal harder pregnancy. My first and only pregnancy, boy, didn't know I was pregnant until 10weeks. No sickness, just had really bad heartburn 3rd trimester and swollen ankles last few weeks. No weights gain anywhere apart from the bump; I ate healthily and walked miles everyday right until labour which I think helped but I didn't have an increased appetite at all. Post baby is a different story; I actually gained my 'baby' weight when baby was 4months onwards, through an unbelievable appetite so I'm convinced it's all down to hormones and the luck of the draw!! I've also noticed wrinkles and grey hairs have suddenly appeared, but he was the worst sleeper imaginable! 🤦

@MisdemeanorOnTheFloor my first two were boys and had brilliant pregnancies with both of them, did get a bit of SPD at the end but that's it!
9 weeks along with this little one and feel horrid!!!
I'll have to let you know in a few weeks and see if your right 😅

Yoga, holistic nutrition and a positive attitude, darling.

Dumb luck. Dumb, undeserved luck either way.

I guess the same way others have easy births? I have two emcs and honestly they were fine, very little pain, I was back to myself within a week, I was bumping a double buggy up to my 3 rd floor flat days after my section, whereas I hear people unable to pick up their baby for 6 weeks.

All my pregnancies have been easy as well (4) never had morning sickness, only thing I had was heart burn but no other issues

@flev that's fascinating - I wonder if there is any truth in that. Makes sense - I'm sure I read that babies could trigger an autoimmune response in mum's, so female immune systems have adapted and can be a bit overreactive in a non-pregnancy scenario. I think this was in the context of why we were deemed vulnerable to Covid initially, and then there was a U-turn.

I think it must be luck. My sister and I are very similar in build etc and obviously had virtually identical upbringings. I had a super easy pregnancy - almost no symptoms, felt really well the whole time. She was laid terribly low with horrific morning sickness (not HG, very little vomiting but awful constant nausea) that lasted all the way to her third trimester. Seems to just be very bad luck in her case!

It's luck. I had three very easy pregnancies, no complications and three very fast births with only gas and air. With my first they treated me like I was some kind of hero in the ward because I was 10cm dilated on arrival at hospital and only used the gas and air, but the reality was that it was nothing I did or didn't and it was just how it went. I felt bad for the other mothers who could hear those comments and might feel bad because their experience had been harder or different though no fault of their own.

The midwives did often say to me that some women's bodies just know what to do in labour and that was the case with me. Every time, as soon as it started it was like boom - here we go, baby! With my third I went from 4cm dilated to her being born in literally five minutes. But there is reason for it and it's not something anyone can control or change.

I've had friends who have laboured for days and their body just can't seem to kick things off and they end in a section or whatever, but it's nothing they did.

On the flip side I could not breastfeed, I tried so hard and it only partially worked with my third. It was a horrible, humiliating and traumatic experience with my first and I mean that genuinely. I can't understand how people can find it easy because my body just won't do it and neither will my babies.

So it's the same thing, it's nothing I did right or wrong really, it's just easy for some and hard for others.

(And both babies are boys for us!)

I’ve had two boys and two girls and all the pregnancies were the same for me.

@feb2022 how exciting! I would love to have another (crazy as I was the most fearful of pregnancy/birth person ever) but the 1 has finished me off!!

Oh for possible reasons because I think that's what you are asking - I am very physically fit and have been every time I've been pregnant. I exercise a lot and my weight is the lower end of normal. I don't know if these factors helped.

I'm also 'older' - had all my children after 35. I wouldn't expect this to be a benefit though!

I’m currently 20 weeks pregnant with my 1st baby and I have been very unwell so far.

I’ve had 3 admissions to EPAU for IV fluids due to HG and I am dizzy constantly which affects every aspect of my life. I still can’t stomach a lot of foods, mostly just plain, beige foods which makes me feel awful that I can’t give my baby better nutrition.

My sickness is easing now but in this heat I am vomiting a lot. I had to to have the first 6 weeks after my BFP off work and have had the odd day off here and there due to just being so dizzy and sick which I’m sure is annoying everyone of my colleagues and my boss.

Interesting that the poster who said about possible link to difficulty TTC and having worse sickness. It took us a year to conceive with additional help of ovulation stimulating meds and progesterone.

Overall, I don’t know why there is such disparity but I wish I did!

My first pregnancy, my dear daughter 3 years ago, had typical morning sickness, ligament pains etc the lot. Toddler been intense from day 1 haha

My second pregnancy, trouble from week 8. Ended up being hospitalised from week 16 and in premature labour at week 21, and my heart stopped beating for a few minutes and nearly needed a hysterectomy. Ds unfortunately passed away few hours later.

My third pregnancy, I was anxious but it was a breeze from day 1. No sickness, no tiredness, had gestational diabetes but it was all good. No ligament pains, honestly an absolute dream, which resulted in a very quick 7 minute labour resulting in my now 12 week old ds. Who is also a dream baby.

So I don't think some people are lucky, I would have looked lucky in my previous pregnancy if no1 didn't know the horrendous time I had before that. I think every pregnancy is different

I think a lot is luck.

But also, what makes a pregnancy easy or difficult is due to a large number of separate factors. I'm sure there is research indicating what the risk factors are for different health issues, such as swelling, extreme exhaustion, sickness and so forth. What bothers one person might not actually bother another.

I had a difficult pregnancy on paper (chronic pain that was really, really exacerbated and high risk due to severe endo), but (and I know this will sound strange) I really enjoyed the majority of the 'bad' symptoms. I was lucky to only be sick once every day or two but I genuinely loved it every time it happened. So I would say I had an easy pregnancy because I loved all of it even though someone else who had the same symptoms and problems might have said it was terrible.

Birth is total luck too and it drives me mad how it's often framed as something you can make go a certain way if only you have the right birth plan, pay for a breathing course and learn mantras. It's a brutal pretty brutal and dangerous process at the end of the day. It makes me laugh when you see people say they had a pain relief-free 'natural' home birth because they did hypno birthing or were strong enough to resist intervention or whatever.