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AIBU?

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Original poster

Am I right or is husband

87 replies

Rizzoli123 · 19/07/2021 22:07

I had a job interview today at a supermarket.

Really want the job. Nothing much but something to get me out of the house

Husband begged me not to go as he was worried about covid. He also said he didn't know why I had to get a job in the school holidays as it ruins it for the kids and now he can't make any plans.

I got a snotty phone message saying my youngest was crying and would be sat in the gym till I came back. I called them on my walk to the interview and he was fine and excited.

I did the interview, came home had to go straight upstairs for a shower and to change my clothes. I am also not allowed in close contact to him for 48 hours until I have had a negitive LFT test on weds.

I will say we have a high covid rate in our area

He has said I should get a job but as a dinner lady that I can work around school hours and have the holidays off with the kids and be here when they go and when they come back from school.

I want to add I always wear a mask and wash my hands. I kept my distance from everyone.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 19/07/2021 22:30

I would be getting a job and planning to move out tbh. Sounds horrendously controlling.

Original poster
Rizzoli123 · 19/07/2021 22:31

Yes. From home emailing people

OP posts:
bellsbuss · 19/07/2021 22:31

The fear Covid has put into some people is very sad, I'm not going to slate your husband as you said he wasn't like this before. He does need help though as it's not going anywhere anytime soon and you can't live like that long term.

WorldsBestBoss · 19/07/2021 22:31

Sounds like he (and possibly his parents) have some severe anxiety surrounding covid.
Do you think you could calmly discuss with him that he might want to get some help to overcome this?
I understand how scary it can be, but we are all going to have to live with this and you can't put your entire life on hold to ease his anxiety.

Nicknacky · 19/07/2021 22:31

Is he willing to seek support for his fears?

endofthelinefinally · 19/07/2021 22:32

He works an hour a day? What else does he contribute to the family?

Original poster
Rizzoli123 · 19/07/2021 22:32

@WorldsBestBoss

Sounds like he (and possibly his parents) have some severe anxiety surrounding covid. Do you think you could calmly discuss with him that he might want to get some help to overcome this? I understand how scary it can be, but we are all going to have to live with this and you can't put your entire life on hold to ease his anxiety.
I have tried numerous times. Says I'm in the wrong and don't understand.
OP posts:
jelly79 · 19/07/2021 22:34

How does he feel about the children going the gym? Or school?

If this fear is covid he needs help with anxiety

Funnylittlefloozie · 19/07/2021 22:35

@Rizzoli123

Yes. From home emailing people
Is he a Nigerian prince, by any chance?
5foot5 · 19/07/2021 22:35

We live with my MIL ane fil

Mo wonder you want to get out of the house more Grin

Original poster
Rizzoli123 · 19/07/2021 22:35

@endofthelinefinally

He works an hour a day? What else does he contribute to the family?
Cooks dinner, does minimal cleaning.
OP posts:
Original poster
Rizzoli123 · 19/07/2021 22:36

@5foot5

We live with my MIL ane fil

Mo wonder you want to get out of the house more Grin

😂 To right
OP posts:
WorldsBestBoss · 19/07/2021 22:39

It sounds like you are in a very stressful pressure cooker environment - living with a group of people who don't want to leave the house.
Are they going to be like this forever do you think?

This is going to have a knock on effect on your children.

I really hope that you get the job, and if not this one then apply for some others.

WorldsBestBoss · 19/07/2021 22:44

Out of curiosity, when covid rates were really low, was he any different?
Or any different after being vaccinated?
I was terrified at the beginning when not much was known, and would not even let my husband get fish and chips in case covid was on the wrapper! Wiped down all shopping etc.
But as time has gone on I've become calmer about it all, especially after my first vaccination.

Whammyyammy · 19/07/2021 22:54

He sounds lovely.....

HollowTalk · 19/07/2021 22:57

What kind of plans did he have in mind? I'd love to know about this one hour a day job.

Original poster
Rizzoli123 · 19/07/2021 23:15

@WorldsBestBoss

Out of curiosity, when covid rates were really low, was he any different? Or any different after being vaccinated? I was terrified at the beginning when not much was known, and would not even let my husband get fish and chips in case covid was on the wrapper! Wiped down all shopping etc. But as time has gone on I've become calmer about it all, especially after my first vaccination.
He has been like it since the start. Be has calmed down but now this has happened its gone higher again
OP posts:
2bazookas · 19/07/2021 23:15

I am also not allowed in close contact to him for 48 hours until I have had a negitive LFT test

    There you go, every cloud has a silver lining.
Original poster
Rizzoli123 · 19/07/2021 23:16

@HollowTalk

What kind of plans did he have in mind? I'd love to know about this one hour a day job.
It's a family business. He does the admin
OP posts:
Original poster
Rizzoli123 · 19/07/2021 23:25

@2bazookas

I am also not allowed in close contact to him for 48 hours until I have had a negitive LFT test 
    There you go, every cloud has a silver lining.</div></div>

😂

OP posts:
2LostSoulsSwimmingInAFishBowl · 19/07/2021 23:25

@2bazookas

I am also not allowed in close contact to him for 48 hours until I have had a negitive LFT test 
    There you go, every cloud has a silver lining.</div></div>

This ^

All joking aside, he’s being horribly controlling and whatever his reasons are for that, it’s not acceptable. The question is, how much longer are you willing to put up with this? Because covid isn’t going anywhere any time soon. And what happens after covid? Will there be another excuse to stop you leaving the house?

I really hope you get the job and have a good think about your future and your kids futures.

PurpleOkapi · 19/07/2021 23:29

I am also not allowed in close contact to him for 48 hours until I have had a negitive LFT test on weds.

This is too much. If he were sincerely so worried about covid, he'd be taking care of the kids himself, and he wouldn't want you near them, either. He's just being a controlling prick.

Oblahdeeoblahdoe · 19/07/2021 23:33

If he only works one hour a day surely he can do school runs and cover the holidays. He needs to start being a parent and not a dictator towards his wife. He's a CF

QueenBee52 · 19/07/2021 23:35

@PurpleOkapi

I am also not allowed in close contact to him for 48 hours until I have had a negitive LFT test on weds.

This is too much. If he were sincerely so worried about covid, he'd be taking care of the kids himself, and he wouldn't want you near them, either. He's just being a controlling prick.

and what does he expect you to do IF you get the job? and you're there every day 🤔

the man needs a rocket up his arse 🌸

I too hope you get the job OP 🎉

Curlygirl06 · 20/07/2021 08:41

I've worked in a supermarket for years, before covid. I've worked there before there were screens, gloves, social distancing markers, number limiting, panic buying, the whole 9 yards.
I've been fine, touch wood, and the majority of staff have. We've had people off with cv plus people isolating and as far as I know they have caught it elsewhere. Tell him to get a grip.

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