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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Out of control dog disturbing baby in garden - help?!

602 replies

soirritating · 18/07/2021 14:37

I'll keep it as brief as possible. Basically I have a 3 month old baby and we are often out in the garden in the pram in the nice weather. Sometimes she falls asleep whilst out there (obviously I put her in the shade and stay with her just rocking her etc).

My issue is that next door have a small noisy dog which seems to have some sort of motion sensor on it. Literally every time there's any sort of movement, like me standing to rock her from sitting, the dog runs to the fence (I can see through the small slats) and starts yapping very loudly. And it's constant, continual yapping, until the neighbour eventually comes and retrieves it and what I would describe as half heartedly tells it off, eg. "stop it, come inside". Dog ignores her and continues. By this time my baby is wide awake and crying. This is every single time we are in the garden and make any sort of movement. Her "tellings off" are also few and far between - sometimes she just leaves the dog to yap at us through the fence.

As well as waking her sometimes when she's asleep it has also given her a shock and made her cry her on one occasion when we were out in the garden on her playmat - the best shaded area is right by my garden fence so that's where I was sitting with her lying on her mat. Next thing the dogs comes bounding over and is yapping inches from where we are. She startled and cried instantly. I was so upset on this occasion I just went back inside.

I know dogs bark. I get that. But i have owned a dog previously and if it was barking through the fence every single time a neighbour and her small baby were out there I'd be taking it inside. She doesn't seem to do that. So often we just end up back inside so baby isn't upset and can sleep, which I don't think is fair.

I don't expect silence in my garden by any means. But a dog constantly up at the fence, inches from where you know there's a small baby?? I just wouldn't let this continue. I'm starting to feel like I can't use my garden.

AIBU?

OP posts:
bullyingadvice2017 · 18/07/2021 17:23

Get a water squirter.... my dog would stop instantly and never do it again if the water pistol comes out!

m0therofdragons · 18/07/2021 17:24

I’ll tolerate a crying baby or a teenagers listening to music over a yappy dog any day. Teens aren’t very loud at all in my experience (I have one and next door has 2 who are now 18 and 20 but we’ve been here 4 years - they’ve had one party).

GreyhoundG1rl · 18/07/2021 17:24

[quote SlothinSpirit]@GreyhoundG1rl. Never tried them myself (we only have one cat visitor who is very friendly and pleasant) but I think you can get them for cats. Also those high-pitched whistles that cats and dogs hate.[/quote]
Great. On it...

2021ismyyear · 18/07/2021 17:24

Ooooh I like the idea of products to repel dogs. I think that might be the way forward. Make it unpleasant then it won’t bother you again.

IamaBluebird · 18/07/2021 17:25

Op you could buy a camping shade, they’re huge so would cover lots of fence.

soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:25

@Floralnomad

No doubt next year , if you still live there your baby will be disturbing your neighbours by screaming / crying / shouting in the garden - it’s life get over it , or move .

Considering I took my baby out of a baby class because she was crying and I was worried about upsetting the other mums (who are just about the most understanding bunch in the world when it comes to crying babies), I'm sure I'm the sort of mum who's likely to have my baby screaming and crying all over the garden. Makes sense.

Hmm
OP posts:
m0therofdragons · 18/07/2021 17:26

Dogs don’t hate high pitched whistles - gun dogs come to them so if you did that my cocker would be at your feet!

Floralnomad · 18/07/2021 17:27

If you don’t have children or have grown up children the noise made by children is equally as irritating as dogs barking IMO . I have a football constantly banging / thudding at one side of my garden and a 15/16 month old screaming constantly on the other , interspersed by a howling dog , they are all pretty much the same annoyance wise . However I choose to live here so that’s life .

soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:27

@luckylavender

I think you're getting a really hard time OP. It would annoy me too.

I think so too but I'm a tough cookie don't worry 😬

I just didn't realise there was odd baby/dog divide thing on MN 😂

OP posts:
soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:28

A*gain

It's not the "irritating" / noise level aspect

It's the startling and upsetting aspect for my baby that concerns me.

How many times?* 😂

OP posts:
soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:28

@2021ismyyear

Ooooh I like the idea of products to repel dogs. I think that might be the way forward. Make it unpleasant then it won’t bother you again.

What might an example be?

OP posts:
soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:31

@IamaBluebird

Op you could buy a camping shade, they’re huge so would cover lots of fence.

Ah good idea - would create more shade than a parasol I guess. Thing is our garden isn't exactly huge ... so there's a limit to how far we can be from the fence. But there is scope to be further away.

OP posts:
unwuthering · 18/07/2021 17:33

Water pistol would be quite fun. Shoot the little fucker every time he starts up, from the shade of your new sanctuary...

LoislovesStewie · 18/07/2021 17:34

Floralnomad, I made this point to be told that children shrieking would not cause anyone to jump. Well, I know at least 2 people who would jump if they were subjected to shrieking children. The answer was noise-cancelling headphones. I am not being goady, just pointing out that anything can annoy someone. And that talking to the neighbour might resolve things.

m0therofdragons · 18/07/2021 17:34

I’m sitting in my garden with my 13yo reading, 2 10 year olds colouring and the dog laid in the shade. Why do people think loud is acceptable and the only option for children and dogs? Apart from a bit of traffic noise it’s silent here in my cul de sac full of families.

soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:42

Here is a diagram (taken from a zoom in on Google maps obviously with street names removed). Our garden is shaded green, neighbour is red. Boundary between the two is where the dog yaps. You can see my garden is a lot smaller so fewer options to sit away from fence and yappy dog.

The purple on our house shows the location of my baby's room for those suggesting neighbours would hear her cry. Highly unlikely.

Out of control dog disturbing baby in garden - help?!
OP posts:
soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:45

I haven't put my parked car on - it has no relevance to the story😂 my phone does that automatically on Google maps

OP posts:
Popcornriver · 18/07/2021 17:50

Why are posters still comparing the two fgs

Probably because they can be equally annoying.

I'm actually surprised your neighbours have their dog in the garden for so long in this weather. It's too hot for most dogs right now. I hope they have some good shade for it.

They obviously shouldn't have a dog barking non stop but I don't think you can expect outside to be quiet enough for a sleeping baby. Kids playing, mowing grass etc

Popcornriver · 18/07/2021 17:52

That was can't expect. Other people are also outside in their gardens enjoying the nice weather.

soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:54

@Popcornriver

I agree that shrieking kids might be equally as annoying to some as a barking dog. But my point was that shrieking kids playing are unlikely to startle or make a baby cry. A barking dog in close proximity, however, can (and does in my case). So the annoying factor is not really the point I'm making. More that it's startling the baby.

OP posts:
Popcornriver · 18/07/2021 17:57

Definitely agree they're not the same but that's why they're compared. I don't agree that kids playing are unlikely to startle a baby though. Especially if they're excited and you factor in trampolines/swings etc. There's been a couple of posts on here recently about shrieking children Grin

soirritating · 18/07/2021 18:02

@Popcornriver

Definitely agree they're not the same but that's why they're compared. I don't agree that kids playing are unlikely to startle a baby though. Especially if they're excited and you factor in trampolines/swings etc. There's been a couple of posts on here recently about shrieking children Grin
Perhaps yes, for some babies. I think in my case the difference is the proximity and loudness - we hear kids playing around here all the time and my baby sleeps through that no problems. The dog right up at the fence, not so much.
OP posts:
Blue4YOU · 18/07/2021 18:05

@Jenasaurus - little things like robotic hoovers…

Mamabear12 · 18/07/2021 18:09

I would just say something. Maybe she doesn’t know. I would start by saying “I’m sorry to mention this, but every time I go into the garden with the baby when she is napping, your dog barks a lot at us. I’m wondering if there is something that can be done? Perhaps if I meet your dog and she feels more comfortable w me? Or perhaps the dog could be kept in sometimes so it doesn’t happen every time we go out? Again, really sorry, it’s just our baby is so young and gets easily woken up.”

Once I had to ask our neighbors if they could stop leaving kitchen lights at night bc they were like spot lights shining directly into our kids rooms. Anyway, they never did again. I was surprised that I had to just mention it once and they never did it again (3 years ago!) I suspect they might have done something as well to fix the lights from shining towards us. But anyway, if I never mentioned it, then nothing would have changed.

And I have a dog, she never barks at anyone while in the garden. But we also have proper fences and also she doesn’t go in the garden much as we take her for walks etc (even though door is left open most of the day!).

echidna1 · 18/07/2021 18:10

@soirritating Pm'd you