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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Out of control dog disturbing baby in garden - help?!

602 replies

soirritating · 18/07/2021 14:37

I'll keep it as brief as possible. Basically I have a 3 month old baby and we are often out in the garden in the pram in the nice weather. Sometimes she falls asleep whilst out there (obviously I put her in the shade and stay with her just rocking her etc).

My issue is that next door have a small noisy dog which seems to have some sort of motion sensor on it. Literally every time there's any sort of movement, like me standing to rock her from sitting, the dog runs to the fence (I can see through the small slats) and starts yapping very loudly. And it's constant, continual yapping, until the neighbour eventually comes and retrieves it and what I would describe as half heartedly tells it off, eg. "stop it, come inside". Dog ignores her and continues. By this time my baby is wide awake and crying. This is every single time we are in the garden and make any sort of movement. Her "tellings off" are also few and far between - sometimes she just leaves the dog to yap at us through the fence.

As well as waking her sometimes when she's asleep it has also given her a shock and made her cry her on one occasion when we were out in the garden on her playmat - the best shaded area is right by my garden fence so that's where I was sitting with her lying on her mat. Next thing the dogs comes bounding over and is yapping inches from where we are. She startled and cried instantly. I was so upset on this occasion I just went back inside.

I know dogs bark. I get that. But i have owned a dog previously and if it was barking through the fence every single time a neighbour and her small baby were out there I'd be taking it inside. She doesn't seem to do that. So often we just end up back inside so baby isn't upset and can sleep, which I don't think is fair.

I don't expect silence in my garden by any means. But a dog constantly up at the fence, inches from where you know there's a small baby?? I just wouldn't let this continue. I'm starting to feel like I can't use my garden.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Elys3 · 18/07/2021 16:59

Wow, some ridiculous comments. A yapping dog next door is a pain in the arse. If talking to the neighbour doesn’t solve it, consider reporting them to your local council. They can deal with barking dogs.

unwuthering · 18/07/2021 16:59

The dog has as much control of the noise it makes as the baby does.

Yes...? it is the owners who need to train or control it or bring it inside.

Lazy owners of dog vs baby, is that easier for you to read and understand?

Notonthestairs · 18/07/2021 16:59

"I don’t understand why you’d sit ram up against the fence and not think to get a shade of some description and move elsewhere if it was annoying that much."

Agree with this.

Out of control dog = terrier yapping at fence.

Baycitystroller · 18/07/2021 16:59

I think there’s some good advice on this thread. I would probably stop arguing with people now though OP.

soirritating · 18/07/2021 16:59

Because the op’s other child will also be noisy.

Incorrect. And even if she were to go in her bedroom and blast her music, her room is at the front of the house nowhere near the back garden, and as I've said repeatedly there's quite a distance between the houses themselves.

OP posts:
ArabellaScott · 18/07/2021 17:00

Well, it's up to you, OP. I don't know how you will solve it without working with your neighbour. You would need to do as pp suggested, gradually acclimatising the dog to you/your baby in the garden. Dogs are trainable but not by magic, it takes time and work to do so. I meant offering to pay for a session as a kind of peace offering, really, to show willing. Your neighbour sounds like she isn't aware how to solve it, so suggesting a behaviouralist/trainer will at least plant the suggestion that the behaviour can/should be changed. And offering to co operate is more likely to get results than just complaining, I expect. Framing it as a problem that you both share helps to defuse any confrontation.

soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:00

@Elys3

Wow, some ridiculous comments. A yapping dog next door is a pain in the arse. If talking to the neighbour doesn’t solve it, consider reporting them to your local council. They can deal with barking dogs.

Thank you, this will be my last resort if she doesn't respond well to my attempts to talk to her.

OP posts:
Greenwateringcan · 18/07/2021 17:01

@soirritating

Because the op’s other child will also be noisy.

Incorrect. And even if she were to go in her bedroom and blast her music, her room is at the front of the house nowhere near the back garden, and as I've said repeatedly there's quite a distance between the houses themselves.

So it’s ok for your daughter to blast music. Ok then.
soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:01

@Greenwateringcan

It was hypothetical- "even if she were to do this", it would not be heard. Read it properly

OP posts:
momofasweetboy2018 · 18/07/2021 17:02

YANBU! It does sound awful.

soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:03

Thanks all those who offered helpful ideas - bowing out now as there are some absolutely crackpot posters on here clearly bored and desperate for an argument with a stranger on the internet.

I'll attempt conversation with neighbour, parasol for shade away from fence... and then report to council if all else fails.

Smile
OP posts:
unwuthering · 18/07/2021 17:05

Good luck, OP. I admire your reserve in dealing with the weird aggressiveness on this thread. Barking mad!

Notavegan · 18/07/2021 17:05

A Jack Russell did this to me in a rented house. I stopped using the garden due to the yapping little shit. Owners didn't care less. Dog used to sit in wait for me.

Panicmode1 · 18/07/2021 17:05

I can't believe some of the responses on this thread - I think the heat is getting to people Wink.

We have a neighbour whose dog yaps along our shared back fence ALL THE TIME and it is driving me demented. Sometimes it sets off our dog, who runs out and barks - EVERY single time, I go and tell off our dog (loudly) and take her inside. They do nothing.

Then in lockdown, the neighbour one along on our side, got a yappy doodle something and it also barks....it is driving those of us in close proximity , absolutely insane.

Of course, unless you live in splendid rural isolation with no neighbours, you have to put up with a bit of give and take, but neighbours like this are taking (the piss).

I would try and have a chat, and if that doesn't work, perhaps talk to the dog warden/noise abatement officer at the Council?!

notsorighteousthesedays · 18/07/2021 17:07

Apparently shower curtains are the in thing for a quick designer revamp of gardens this summer so get yourself a couple of magically patterned ones and pin to the fence - job done cheaply and fun too!!

soirritating · 18/07/2021 17:07

@unwuthering

Good luck, OP. I admire your reserve in dealing with the weird aggressiveness on this thread. Barking mad!
😂😂
OP posts:
SlothinSpirit · 18/07/2021 17:07

You can get products which repel dogs - sprays, crystals etc - which you could put on your side of the fence. Might be enough to keep the little nuisance away from you.

I wouldn't bother counselling the dog...its mental wellbeing is not your problem. Just make coming near your side of the fence as unpleasant as possible for it.

Keepkondoing · 18/07/2021 17:08

I have dogs, they do bark in the garden sometimes particularly if they are spooked, I do my best to stop them as soon as they start and get them indoors as soon as possible, we are training them not to bark and it is working. However I’d have no problem in your situation with you working with us on training the dog not to bark i.e you spraying the dog with water each time it barked from your side. A barking dog is annoying for all so I can’t see why your neighbour wouldn’t appreciate you doing that as long as you speak to her first.
However if you can do something to block the gaps in the fence or create some shade somewhere else it might make life easier for all and allow everyone to enjoy their gardens in peace.

Kayjay2018 · 18/07/2021 17:14

@soirritating as mum to a 1 year old (so in the garden at about the same age last year) and owner of a rescue who will sometimes bark at neighbours, we have had issues. Our dog does and always has been, bought indoors when he starts to bark. he was barking at the men (we live next to an hmo) when they went into their garden just the other side of the hedge and it was painful all around not being able to have him in the garden with us, frustrated the neighbours (although they never said anything) and woke my own baby.

What we have found worked, in addition to being removed indoors, is that we have actually got to know our neighbours and a couple of them in particular. We have them visit in our garden and give the dog some treats (we have supplied) and they sometimes may bring a leftover sausage from their barbecue. This has been an absolute game changer, the dog no longer sees them as a threat and there is no barking!

Oh and by the way the new issue is the toddler screaming with delight with her water play tray and toys! 🤣

m0therofdragons · 18/07/2021 17:15

Maybe ask the neighbour what you can do to respond if dog barks at your movement so you can ensure you’re consistent with the owner’s training (I hate confrontation).

GreyhoundG1rl · 18/07/2021 17:17

@SlothinSpirit

You can get products which repel dogs - sprays, crystals etc - which you could put on your side of the fence. Might be enough to keep the little nuisance away from you.

I wouldn't bother counselling the dog...its mental wellbeing is not your problem. Just make coming near your side of the fence as unpleasant as possible for it.

Do they work on cats? Asking for a friend...
Floralnomad · 18/07/2021 17:20

No doubt next year , if you still live there your baby will be disturbing your neighbours by screaming / crying / shouting in the garden - it’s life get over it , or move .

luckylavender · 18/07/2021 17:20

I think you're getting a really hard time OP. It would annoy me too.

SlothinSpirit · 18/07/2021 17:23

@GreyhoundG1rl. Never tried them myself (we only have one cat visitor who is very friendly and pleasant) but I think you can get them for cats. Also those high-pitched whistles that cats and dogs hate.

Wallpapering · 18/07/2021 17:23

@Floralnomad

No doubt next year , if you still live there your baby will be disturbing your neighbours by screaming / crying / shouting in the garden - it’s life get over it , or move .
Doubt it the baby will be one

And baby is not same as yapping dog.

Why are posters still comparing the two fgs