Anyone else feel like they can’t afford much?

[Kitten189]

I earn around 19.5k a year which is low, but I have no dependants.
I live with my partner and he earns slightly lower, our rent isn’t that high between us but sometimes I just feel like I can’t afford to live very well.

I used to go shopping with friends and they would be spending hours buying quite high-end things and I could just about afford something from primark.
Virtually all my clothes are from Primark, charity shops, EBay, Tesco etc.

I don’t drink or smoke, I have a basic gym membership, a phone contract and Netflix but that’s it.

I get my hair cut every 6 weeks at £25 and I very occasionally get Botox or a facial, but I get it cut price.

I have zero debt which is good, no overdraft etc. As until last year I was in debt, I paid it off with birthday money from my parents.

I just don’t seem to save anything and don’t know where it all goes. I see people going out to fancy places, wearing nice clothes etc and still managing to save money.

I recently went for a meal with friends. It was at a fancy restaurant one of them had chosen, I just had one main but they were all ordering cocktails, desserts etc like it was nothing.

I shop in Poundland, Wilkos and mainly Aldi etc.

Just don’t know where I’m going wrong, I can’t seem to afford anything and never seem to save. I used to have a friend who was out drinking twice a week yet still managed to save £200 per month.

Anyone else feel like this?

Yeah it doesn't help I love a drink and seemingly so does everyone around me!

OP I understand what you are getting at and so would most people in the country. You work hard for 40 hours a week and can just about afford a few extra treats, yet some people spend lavishly without seemingly a care in the world.

Mumsnet is such an upper middle class enclave. (How many times can PPs repeat 'you are on a very low income' and reel off their high salaries FFS).

To all those suggesting you get your NQT and all will be peachy: I have the NQT and now work in a non-teaching role for even less than OP (quelle horreur!).

Just because there are TV adverts for new teachers people seem to think you can just waltz into a teaching career. It very much depends on your subject area, part of the country etc. My school seemed to get new NQTs every year rather than employ permanently. You will have missed this boat unfortunately as there are more NQTs every year.

If you aren't 100% enthusiastic about being a teacher, it isn't worth the stress. And teaching is SO incredibly stressful. Talk to any group of teachers and at least 1 will be looking to leave. A big percentage of my PGCE cohort aren't in teaching for various reasons. You aren't alone basically!

Anyway the money thing. I think you are doing really well to stay out of debt. I do all the same things as you - Aldi, Primark. 25 pounds is a good price for a haircut!

What are your money goals? I am a few years older than you (late 30s) and have bought a small property with my (also low wage) partner in Greater Manchester. If you are looking to do this then try and figure out how much you can put aside each month for a deposit. Maybe use the money you would have spent on the gym? I downloaded one of those apps that links to your bank account and shows you how much you spend each month on different categories such as food, transport etc. This might help you see if there is anything you could cut. (Fewer nights out if you aren't enjoying them?).

@2orangey

OP I understand what you are getting at and so would most people in the country. You work hard for 40 hours a week and can just about afford a few extra treats, yet some people spend lavishly without seemingly a care in the world.

Mumsnet is such an upper middle class enclave. (How many times can PPs repeat 'you are on a very low income' and reel off their high salaries FFS).

To all those suggesting you get your NQT and all will be peachy: I have the NQT and now work in a non-teaching role for even less than OP (quelle horreur!).

Just because there are TV adverts for new teachers people seem to think you can just waltz into a teaching career. It very much depends on your subject area, part of the country etc. My school seemed to get new NQTs every year rather than employ permanently. You will have missed this boat unfortunately as there are more NQTs every year.

If you aren't 100% enthusiastic about being a teacher, it isn't worth the stress. And teaching is SO incredibly stressful. Talk to any group of teachers and at least 1 will be looking to leave. A big percentage of my PGCE cohort aren't in teaching for various reasons. You aren't alone basically!

Anyway the money thing. I think you are doing really well to stay out of debt. I do all the same things as you - Aldi, Primark. 25 pounds is a good price for a haircut!

What are your money goals? I am a few years older than you (late 30s) and have bought a small property with my (also low wage) partner in Greater Manchester. If you are looking to do this then try and figure out how much you can put aside each month for a deposit. Maybe use the money you would have spent on the gym? I downloaded one of those apps that links to your bank account and shows you how much you spend each month on different categories such as food, transport etc. This might help you see if there is anything you could cut. (Fewer nights out if you aren't enjoying them?).

If I’m being perfectly honest a lot of people in the country wouldn’t understand the OP at all. In what world is £400 (being very conservative) personal spending classed as ‘just able to afford a few treats’?

To me, that income doesn’t sit with £100 nights out.

This is the issue….the expenses are behind the means….likely to be the case for many of your friends too in reality u less they earn well more than double what you have.

I earn more than double what you do and so does my DH. We are not hard up, but if one of us went out for a night out, we wouldn’t expect it to cost more than £30 unless it was something pretty special…..and only £50 perhaps once or twice a year. We would expect to both go out for a friends birthday on a so-called big night and it to be around £50-60 for the pair of us. It does help that I don’t drink much, but DH would probably have half a bottle of wine if we were out for a meal with friends, or two or three beers.

These nights out which involve expensive rounds, taxis, both a meal and then some kind of extra late night meal etc etc seem an awful lot for just a standard Friday night out. But I guess if the company you keep like to do this and it’s the norm in your circle, then it’s hard to participate and not do it. I said before, but I do think for most people these kind of lifestyles have a limited shelf life. By the time you’re 30 people will be dropping off to save for houses or having kids.

@WombatChocolate

To me, that income doesn’t sit with £100 nights out.

This is the issue….the expenses are behind the means….likely to be the case for many of your friends too in reality u less they earn well more than double what you have.

I earn more than double what you do and so does my DH. We are not hard up, but if one of us went out for a night out, we wouldn’t expect it to cost more than £30 unless it was something pretty special…..and only £50 perhaps once or twice a year. We would expect to both go out for a friends birthday on a so-called big night and it to be around £50-60 for the pair of us. It does help that I don’t drink much, but DH would probably have half a bottle of wine if we were out for a meal with friends, or two or three beers.

These nights out which involve expensive rounds, taxis, both a meal and then some kind of extra late night meal etc etc seem an awful lot for just a standard Friday night out. But I guess if the company you keep like to do this and it’s the norm in your circle, then it’s hard to participate and not do it. I said before, but I do think for most people these kind of lifestyles have a limited shelf life. By the time you’re 30 people will be dropping off to save for houses or having kids.

You're right it's all about what those around you are doing. In the context of OP, it can feel like everyone around you is doing so much more than you can afford and it's sucks.

I just don't do the nights out (apart from when friend gifted me the cash because she wanted me there) because I'd rather not go at all than have to nurse a cheap drink while everyone else knocks back cocktails. Or that horrible moment when the food bill comes and everyone naturally wants to split it equally and you're sat there thinking oh lord I had a small salad and I hope someone notices before I have to say something about only paying by share.

Yeah, there are bigger problems but it still sucks.

My friends didn't cut down when they hit 30... if anything they spend more these days. Maybe I need new skint friends!

@WombatChocolate

To me, that income doesn’t sit with £100 nights out.

This is the issue….the expenses are behind the means….likely to be the case for many of your friends too in reality u less they earn well more than double what you have.

I earn more than double what you do and so does my DH. We are not hard up, but if one of us went out for a night out, we wouldn’t expect it to cost more than £30 unless it was something pretty special…..and only £50 perhaps once or twice a year. We would expect to both go out for a friends birthday on a so-called big night and it to be around £50-60 for the pair of us. It does help that I don’t drink much, but DH would probably have half a bottle of wine if we were out for a meal with friends, or two or three beers.

These nights out which involve expensive rounds, taxis, both a meal and then some kind of extra late night meal etc etc seem an awful lot for just a standard Friday night out. But I guess if the company you keep like to do this and it’s the norm in your circle, then it’s hard to participate and not do it. I said before, but I do think for most people these kind of lifestyles have a limited shelf life. By the time you’re 30 people will be dropping off to save for houses or having kids.

This. Don’t know why so many people are complimenting OP on her great attitude towards money or suggesting ways to increase her income. It’s her attitude to money that’s the problem and even if she had more money she’d probably just spend it all and be in the exact same position as she is now.

Most of my high earning friends spend at most £300 a month on personal things. And they all prioritise. Some people like dining out, maybe others have a specific hobby. Nobody gets to have everything they want when they want it. If your friends are spendthrifts OP maybe you need new ones?

@firstonealong

Yes your spending is fine and I think you sound very switched on to your money but...

You absolutely need a better paying job

In 1998 I was on your wage as a PA

It makes me so angry the rubbish wages that are being paid, they seem to have just stagnated for the past twenty years

This.. I was just remembering my first "proper" job back in 1991 (Sales I think it was then) and I remember being delighted to be earning 19k a year when I was then 21.