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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DS has over 100k followers on tiktok

80 replies

Peachen · 14/07/2021 10:38

Name changed for this as my friend knows my username.

DS is 15, my ex sent me a message last night telling me his DD found DS’ tiktok account and he's got over 100k followers. I has a look and it's about 117k Shock. I knew he had tiktok but he said his account was private and only his friends followed him which isn't true! There's lots of girls putting heart eye emojis in the comments of his posts and one comment I've seen is inappropriate! A woman commented ‘i hope you're 18+’ he replied back that he's 15 and she replied ‘thats a shame, I'm 19’.

I'm not sure what to do about this, I've not spoken to DS yet. I'm also annoyed that he lied about his account being on private but I'm also uncomfortable at the comments!

OP posts:
HollowTalk · 14/07/2021 10:39

I would set up a fake account and ask to follow him.

HollowTalk · 14/07/2021 10:40

Hang on, just re-read. So he's got a public account. Is there anything inappropriate in his own posts?

VimFuego101 · 14/07/2021 10:45

What is he actually posting? Is it inappropriate?

wedswench · 14/07/2021 10:55

That's money making territory! I hope he's capitalising!

Plenty of young people do this. He should have told you so you could monitor and now you know you can get involved

Original poster
Peachen · 14/07/2021 11:05

No, he's not posting anything inappropriate. I told him he could only have TikTok if his account was on private and people he knew followed him, and I spoke to him about internet safety (think he was 13 at the Time).

OP posts:
babbaloushka · 14/07/2021 11:09

Can you just monitor for a while? He's probably very pleased/proud of it and is worried you'll disapprove.

HollowTalk · 14/07/2021 11:11

So what sort of things is he doing to warrant such a high number of followers?

MoonlightWanderer · 14/07/2021 11:12

I'd follow him and keep an eye on things. I guess he is a good-looking lad or something.

IDontDrinkTea · 14/07/2021 11:12

With stats like that, I’d expect he’s earning money through posting. I’d be asking more about where the money is going

Crowtooyo · 14/07/2021 11:14

He'll be earning a fair amount I should think..

GoWalkabout · 14/07/2021 11:18

You need to get alongside him. Say hey I didn't know you were so big on tiktok, how are you getting on with all that fame? Find out how he handles tricky situations or inappropriate comments. Remember he is an emerging adult. Guide and counsel, don't dictate.

poorbuthappy · 14/07/2021 11:19

What @GoWalkabout said.

Original poster
Peachen · 14/07/2021 11:29

@HollowTalk

So what sort of things is he doing to warrant such a high number of followers?
I don't know why he's got so many followers. His account seems normal and he posts himself lip syncing to songs and occasionally with his friends etc.
OP posts:
idontlikealdi · 14/07/2021 11:32

I take it his friends parents don't now their kids are his tik tok to 117k followers? I'd be wary of that.

peboh · 14/07/2021 11:33

Money wise I doubt he'll be earning a lot. Tik Tok doesn't pay out as much as platforms like YouTube. However he's clearly gone against what you've both agreed as acceptable rules surrounding him having Tik Tok so you need to speak to him and explain that you've found his account and you're not pleased. Don't go in all guns blazing as that will cause hun to shut down on you. Just open and honest, and see what you both do moving forward.

TotorosCatBus · 14/07/2021 11:34

I think you need to watch his content in order to work out whether or not to be cross. Are you or his siblings in any videos? Is he doing anything dangerous or illegal? Does his content make it obvious where you live?

I live in the same street as a teen with similar and his content is gentle pranks, top off while he lip syncs etc The younger kids at school are impressed but dd is Hmm

diamondpony80 · 14/07/2021 11:35

DS has about the same but only has about 5 videos posted. He got the vast majority of those followers from just 1 video that went kind of viral. He's not making any money from it because he has so few videos and you can't really become an influencer unless you take it seriously and post popular videos regularly. Only one guy that DS knows is actually monetizing his account properly but he's got well over 1 million followers and is a prolific content creator. I think to deal directly with brands and get sponsorship deals etc. you need to be over 18, but I guess there's plenty younger Tiktoker's doing it with parental input.

Youdiditanyway · 14/07/2021 11:35

He’s most likely earning money from that and possibly receiving free items too. I only had 6k followers on Instagram when I used it and I got quite a lot of free stuff. You really need to talk to him about this.

TotorosCatBus · 14/07/2021 11:36

Just read your updates. He won't be getting paid much at that level but I'd be concerned about him being contacted by randoms too. Maybe keep it light and find out if he has any online stalkers?

AdoraBell · 14/07/2021 11:39

I agree with GoWalkabout

Branleuse · 14/07/2021 11:43

Its much easier to gain a lot of followers on tiktok than it is places like instagram.
If hes not posting anything inappropriate, then I wouldnt be concerned

Cooldryplace · 14/07/2021 11:45

Oh, I understand the concerns, but I think you need to look at it as a success whilst taking to him about safety. Don't rain on his parade.

MouldyPotato · 14/07/2021 11:46

@GoWalkabout

You need to get alongside him. Say hey I didn't know you were so big on tiktok, how are you getting on with all that fame? Find out how he handles tricky situations or inappropriate comments. Remember he is an emerging adult. Guide and counsel, don't dictate.
This sounds an excellent idea. I know you spoke to him and said he can't have a public account but that was 2 years ago and there can be a big difference between an 13 and 15 year old.
YeokensYegg · 14/07/2021 11:47

I'm a bit surprised at you having no idea what is going on in your son's life.

Lweji · 14/07/2021 11:48

The harm is done, so to speak, and it would be somewhat cruel to cut it off, but you (both parents) should keep a closer eye on it.
He should be open about his social media accounts (on penalty of having them all shut off or internet cut) and you should closely follow but not intrude, unless really necessary.