Crop tops

[MissJeanBrodiesprime]

My XH has said in the past that our teenage DD’s 15 and 18 should not wear crop tops (he said it when oldest was 15). Seeing as this is pretty much all you can buy in the shops at the moment as it’s the fashion and plenty of people are wearing them would I be unreasonable to allow them to wear them? XH is no longer in contact with our DD’s so it’s not as though I’d be going against his wishes, this is not the issue, I'm more interested in a general consensus of how people think about crop tops. They’re just high enough to expose their belly button. Thanks in advance.

Dictating to an adult what they can and can not wear is controlling and manipulative behaviour. Your poor DD.

At 18, your eldest is an adult, she can wear whatever she likes and doesn’t need permission,

@fairynick thanks for your comment, it’s more for my 15 year old I’m asking.

It’s a bit odd that you’re still dictating what they can wear at that age, especially the 18 year old. She’s old enough to get married and leave home, my mum wouldn’t have dreamt of telling me what I could wear when I was 18!

Crop tops are appropriate dress for warm weather. What is so offensive about seeing someone's belly button? My 9 yo has a couple.

My dd of 15 wears what she wants and knows her own style a crop top is the least of his worries with some items I've had to gently steer mine away from. Definitely 18 year old should just wear what she wants and at 15 I wouldn't be banning items of clothing as only going to encourage it. If he has no contact there is v little he can say x

I wore them in the 90s and now my 17 year old daughter does.

I mean you must be buying them in the first place unless your 15 year old has an income if you don't like them don't buy them ? However why don't you want her wearing them do you think her showing her belly button is offensive too sexulized distracting to men? What exactly is your issue apart from agreeing with her dad that she doesn't see

I’d let a 15 year old west one that shows a bit of belly but not one of them boob tubes.

Tbf though, crop tops seem out at the minute. 80s vintage seems to be the in thing at the moment

Just laugh at him op! He's a loon

He's no longer in contact with them but you're still considering that he has any say about their upbringing?

Why?

Sorry I missed the end of your OP.

You know if you ban them she will wear them anyway, she will leave the house in a t shirt and before she has got to the end of the road the t shirt will be in her bag and the crop top revealed .

@Mrsjayy I don’t really have an issue with them at all, I used to wear them myself when I was younger. I think I’m just a bit stumped at why my XH made such a big deal about them years ago, I think he’s said so to the girls too which has made them self conscious and unsure themselves as to whether they should wear them, I’ve only encouraged them and generally don’t tell them what they should and shouldn’t wear.

Do you mean crop tops or cropped tops? They are two different things.

Cropped tops are in fashion, are normal daywear and I'd frankly just ignore him.

Crop Tops are those little underwear things arent they? So under a cropped top or other top.

Your 18 year old is an adult so he can’t dictate what she wears at all. 15 year old is arguably also old enough to decide too and I can’t really see an issue with crop tops provided they aren’t the ones that are basically bras…

No these aren’t the bra type ones, just high enough to see the midriff / belly button. Basically they buy them and then try them on again at home and then spend ages wondering if they “should” wear them, presumably because of something XH said years ago. I just tell them they’re fine, but wasn’t sure if I was missing something.

Why is this even something to consider, what's wrong with crop tops?

I'm sure Mumsnet will hate me. But my 9yo is obsessed with crop tops.

She does gymnastics and dance and if I had abs like hers I'd be pretty keen on wearing them too!

To me it's about balance though. If she's in a crop top then no short shorts.

I'll bet XH didn't have a problem with them when he was 15.
It's just a top - it's not low cut, it's a belly button. I used to wear cropped vest tops as a teen - it shouldn't matter what you wear, it's how you act that counts.

Your ex husband sounds like a misogynistic arsehole don't doubt yourself she is wearing what a lot of 15 year olds are wearing.

If you were talking about 5 and 8 year olds I'd understand but one is an actual adult and one who's next birthday makes her 16 . Of course they should wear whatever they like. Dd11 wears crop tops with high waist shorts so you don't even see any flesh - not that a flash of stomach is offensive anyway. I don't think your exp's view is an excuse or relevant either being as he doesn't have contact

Thanks all for your comments, I know it sounds silly but have wondered about this a lot. Will just continue as I am then and encourage them both to be who they want to be / wear what they want to wear

They should wear what they like. He doesn't have to wear them and if he's worried about what looks or judgement they'll get he's part of the problem for sexualising an item of clothing on a child.

I wish I was young enough (and slim enough) to wear one.