To think this isn't concerning?

[plasmocy]

I've name changed for this as I'm looking for some opinions.

DS is 15, he's sensitive, quiet and well behaved most the time! He's very interested in true crime although he's also interested in other things like football etc.

Ive never thought this was concerning as he also does want to be involved with the police as a job, but he's not decided if he wants to be a police officer or something else yet.

His girlfriends mum messaged me earlier, saying her DD is upset because of DS. He told her to watch something about a serial killer on Netflix (he didn't force her, he told her to watch it ‘if she wanted’). She then started saying how she doesn't want her DD anywhere near DS as it's very worrying him watching things about serial killers (he doesn't just watch these things!) and that he could be dangerous.

Aibu to think that this isn't worrying at all? Or am I not paying enough attention to it? I could do with some outsiders opinions apart from hers.

@TiddyTidTwo

Is it "The Serpent" on Netflix?

If so, it's bloody fantastic!! And I'm not a serial killer either.

That's exactly what a serial killer would say...

I love anything true crime or forensic related, it’s absolutely fascinating. I have never had any desire to hurt or kill anything as yet and I’m in my 50s. Your ds’ girlfriend and mum are being ridiculous.

It seems to me that perhaps he suggested she watched this programme, so she did, was upset by the content and told her mum.

To be honest I wouldn't have liked that to have happened to my dd when she was that age. Some of that true crime stuff is truly repellent - it's the stuff of nightmares and really not suitable for adolescents imo.

Didn't you know OP?

All boys are rapists/serial killers in training

Your son is fine. The mother daughter combo are hysterical odd balls

There's nothing wrong with someone enjoying True Crime progammes. It's a matter of personal taste. DH and I love them and enjoy trying to figure the 'whodunnit' and learning about forensics. Our (adult) sons don't like them and refer to them as 'murder porn' (meaning they're distasteful).

I'd suggest your DS 'back away' from this girl as it sounds to me as if she and her mother might make mountains out of other molehills.

The only possible 'concern' I'd have would be if my son was more focussed on the actual crime itself rather than the police investigations end of it.

I can remember as a teenager discovering Charles Manson and getting quite caught up in that case and that of other serial killers. I don’t know why. As a police officer now I’m definitely not interested in reading details of gruesome cases - probably because I’ve been around dead bodies and I can visualise what some of these murder scenes would have looked like ( grim). I think there’s a difference between following an investigation and wallowing in the details of the crime itself. I wouldn’t want my child to be too interested although if it’s one subject among other things then it seems acceptable. I can understand why someone wouldn’t like it though.

I think the trend for true crime documentaries is pretty distasteful- the violent death of a person shouldn’t be used for entertainment IMO.

There’s a reason it is on Netflix - massive numbers of people watch this stuff. FFS

I'm not sure if she actually watched it, or if he just suggested it. Hes interested in the police investigations not the crimes.

@plasmocy

I'm not sure if she actually watched it, or if he just suggested it. Hes interested in the police investigations not the crimes.

But why do you lack confidence in your own son?

That's the bit I think you need to think about.

When my DD was about 14 her boyfriend of the time kept playing the music to Psycho down the phone to her. I am a paranoid, over protective mother but even I didn't think he was a psychopath out to kill her. I just thought he was being annoying and stupid - but I would never have thought of complaining to his parents that I thought he was dangerous. Teenagers and people of all ages are fascinated by serial killers. I don't think you need to be worried about your son on the account of his choice of film.

Seconding all the comments about their being some fascinating and deeply entertaining true crime documentaries on Netflix - and everywhere else - these days. I don’t have kids but I really wouldn’t worry.

Nah- lots of the kids are at it.
Criminology is a massively popular subject y'know. It's because loads of the young folk are interested in this stuff.
🤷

You need to sit down and have a serious talk with your son.
His girlfriend and her mother are both hysterical drama queens and he needs to get rid of her find another girlfriend.

Lots of people watch true crime shows/documentaries. That means nothing in regards to predilection for committing crime, let alone being a serial killer in the making.

Frankly I’m shocked you heard her out. I would have laughed, told her she was batshit and hung up.

The girlfriends mother sounds batshit! I love true crime documentaries, I also weirdly love ones about cults! Imo it's normal human curiosity and maybe your ds would be best to date someone of a less sensitive nature 🤔

She’s bonkers. True crime is having a real moment these days, it’s very mainstream and a common interest.

Bonkers.

I wonder whether her DD is a particularly sensitive type and her strong reaction is what’s set her (also highly sensitive) mother off. I’m personally not able to watch true crime shows because they freak me out so much but everyone else in my family loves them and can sleep soundly after watching.

Effectively all that’s happened here is that your son has said, ‘hey, I recommend a thing on Netflix’. Like PP have said, it wasn’t some link to the dark web! I gather Making a Murderer has had rave reviews all round?

There’s a flip side to this as well. I used to do a lot of work with the police as a consultant on the corporate side (not crime related) and remember often thinking that thank god there are amazing men and women who are willing to spend their lives dealing with this stuff so that the rest of us can live in safety.

The mum is over reacting. My 15 year old DD watches true crime documentaries all the time - she wants to be a forensic psychologist.

My DH had a vicious crime affect him. It's a crime likely to appear in true crime TV programmes as it made headlines news at the time and they make full programmes on it on the anniversaries etc. For that reason, he's not comfortable with people talking about true crime in front of him. So it could be something like that with the girlfriend's mum.

However, true crime exists and people watch it. Fact of life. He wouldn't stop people watching it just because he's been affected, although I'm not sure what he do if our DC decided they were into it.

I listen to every true crime podcast and I love true crime on tv. I’m not a criminal or had done anything remotely illegal (bar the odd speed ticket).
I love it as I get to see how the human mind work, what pushes people to serious crime and on the other hand, what makes people tick to want to fight crime. Ultimately, they are stories of “hope”, 9/10 the police outwits them, they find the criminals, they solve the crime. There are so many dedicated people in the police forces and many truly live for their job.
Your son had a lucky escape.

We are all different.

I don't understand the interest in true crime. Other people's pain should not be used for entertainment.

But I'm in the minority, it seems. But it appears sick and a bit creepy to me.

Sounds to me like the gf has watched something that's troubled/upset her, the mum has questioned her and she has put the blame on your ds because she knows her dm will be angry. She sounds a bit sheltered if that's the worst she's watched at 15!

I don't think you should be worried about your 15yo being interested in true crime so long as it seems like a normal, healthy interest and not obsessive.

Her mum is a loon.

Her mum sounds odd. I love true crime and gruesome horror movies. I wouldn't say boo to a goose in real life.