To be so enraged over a wine glass!!

[Warwicks]

I recently won a voucher in work for £50. I rarely treat myself to nice things so decided to spend it all on lovely things for myself.

I went to TKMaxx and bought pretty cushions, plant pots and two beautiful iridescent wine glasses.

I have taken care of them, washing them carefully and not putting them in the dishwasher.

DH asks if I want a glass of wine and I agreed, said to use my lovely glass. It was towards the back of the cupboard so impatient DH who is always heavy handed anyway, rather than moving other glasses to extricate it carefully obviously pulled on in and snapped the stem in half.

Oh well he shrugged and chucked it in the bin! I feel so upset over a glass!! I told him he needs to buy me another one. He’s always the same, no patience so will pull and push things until they give. He broke our new sensor bin by pressing the sensor in rather than pressing the open button.

Bloody oaf!!! I’ve told him he needs to buy me a new one. Sick of having stuff destroyed. He can’t see why I’m making a big deal over a £3 glass. AIBU?

@Cherrysoup

My oldest friend bought me stained glass wine glasses. My parents house sat (beneficial for them, they used to live in my area so have lots of friends here still) and invited some mates over. One of their mates broke one of these beautiful no longer made glasses. I was%still am-really pissed off. Why didn’t they give him a bog standard glass? Why didn’t I hide them?!

Your DH sounds thoughtless and impatient in general, he needs to be told.

Aawww Nooooooooo 😩

this is awful ... did they replace them or even offer...😔

too sad.. 🌸

Ironically the same happened to me yesterday. I have one remaining wine glass from the set I bought when I moved into my own home 15 years ago. It's nothing fancy like OP's glasses but it's just the glass I like to drink my wine out of - nothing else seems quite the same. The others in the set have all been broken by clumsy DH since we moved in together and the other finally got broken yesterday in one of his games of 'draining board jenga' when it was his turn to wash up!!

You're so angry because this a pattern of thoughtless behaviour from your shithead oaf of a husband

The glass isn't the issue here

The OP has only posted a couple of comments. The projection here is...intense, even for MN.

OP, it was an accident. If your DH is generally a good, kind egg, though clumsy with stuff and doesn't think that broken things warrant a big drama, then chalk it up, be annoyed and move on.

If he is indeed, the uncaring, thoughtless, hideous POS that he's being grown into by this thread, then it's not about the glass.

It's about consequences really, isn't it? If they don't experience consequences when something happens they don't learn and nothing changes.

I've imposed direct consequences on really trivial things a couple of times - with better effects than months of telling, reminding and nagging ever had. Frustrating to have to treat them like little children though!

@Thekindofwindowsfaceslookinat

You're so angry because this a pattern of thoughtless behaviour from your shithead oaf of a husband

The glass isn't the issue here

The OP has only posted a couple of comments. The projection here is...intense, even for MN.

OP, it was an accident. If your DH is generally a good, kind egg, though clumsy with stuff and doesn't think that broken things warrant a big drama, then chalk it up, be annoyed and move on.

If he is indeed, the uncaring, thoughtless, hideous POS that he's being grown into by this thread, then it's not about the glass.

If it was simply about a £3 glass, any person in a half decent marriage would not be running to MN.

The simple fact that OP feels this warrants a thread online shows that the glass isn't the issue

YANBU at all to be upset. I get irrationally sad when things break. But some people are just clumsy. It's annoying, but not necessarily indicative of anything sinister. Let it go. Buy yourself a new glass. Or just use the other one you still have.

This reminds me a bit of the thread a while ago with the woman who got angry that her DP used her 'pretty sponge' to wash something with.

It's about consequences really, isn't it? If they don't experience consequences when something happens they don't learn and nothing changes

I've imposed direct consequences on really trivial things a couple of times - with better effects than months of telling, reminding and nagging ever had. Frustrating to have to treat them like little children though

Jeez. Can you imagine a man writing this about his female partner? Can you actually imagine how that would go down here?

^Bksjshsbbev2737
I often feel it’s my stuff that gets easily broken while DH is careful with his so sometimes it looks like I over react to things but it upsets me^

This 100%. DH is so casual about everything but his own stuff. Christmas a few years ago he asked why I hadn’t made up a flowers and fairy lights arrangement for the fireplace that ‘always went in that old wine box’. Vintage champagne crate that he’d burst up for firewood for the chiminea the summer before.

Where’s that wee garden ornament of the boy that you got from your great gran gone? Fucked mate, you blootered the head off it with a football when showing off to DS.

Ditto beautiful vase that was a wedding gift off my late uncle, who spent more than he had to spend on a gift, yup you shunted it out the way when you were trying to get something out the cupboard and it got smashed.

I’ve never destroyed anything of his in 25 years of being together. He just doesn’t see what’s important to me, and doesn’t understand why I get upset at ‘stuff’ getting broken. Yes similar things can be bought, but they will never be replacements. It’s the ‘fuck it, why are you upset about a wooden box/wee cement statue etc’ attitude. They all mattered to me, and you ruined them you caveman.

I’d accidentally break something which mattered to him and when discussing the matter, be very disparaging about the broken object.

The simple fact that OP feels this warrants a thread online shows that the glass isn't the issue

This is MN. A thread can run to 15 pages about a sandwich. A thread that's literally Just About The Sandwich.

If there's more, the OP can tell us.

It sounds like it was a dodgy quality glass. Make your husband get you 2 better ones :) I wouldn’t get annoyed about this as long as he replaced it.

Definitely make sure he gets the replacement.

I feel for you. I bought myself some wine glasses earlier this year. Nothing terribly fancy - M&S £15 for 4. DH has already managed to break 3 of them. And yet his hideous cut glass tankards are still intact and have survived 20 years of us living together. I bought a second set after he broke the second glass. He suggested I should buy yet another set after breaking the third glass - but surely that’s something he should do.

@Warwicks These glasses?

I know they say gin glasses but I would use them for wine.

I understand why are so upset. You have probably reacted to his carelessness with an "Oh well, never mind" a thousand times before but this was one time too many.

He should absolutely replace the glass.

Get a grip. Honestly he didn't do it deliberately and I doubt he was being heavy handed in reaching for a glass. These things happen. Unless he was being a dick then what did he do wrong compared to accidentlally dropping it? Tell him to treat you to a nice glass whilst in tesco next. I love my glasses and yet seem to break them for a past time just down to use. Nice that you're sharing some wine together!

Sympathy regarding the heavy-handed husband. Mine does everything in a hurry and ends up breaking stuff. He shoves things into cupboards and kicks them shut. Pulls windows closed so hard the room shakes.

I got a new car this week and he threw in our pushchair wheels, slammed the boot twice before I has to shriek at him that they weren't in properly. Already a dent on the interior door! Fuming.

Yanking on it in an attempt to drag it 'through' a load of other glasses is pure thug stupidity though. That was not an accident. It was an expression of 'doesn't give a fuck'.

I don't understand why you should be all pussyfooting around, careful of his feelings, downplaying the value of stuff, when he doesn't give a fig about either of your feelings or your stuff.

@lottiegarbanzo

Yanking on it in an attempt to drag it 'through' a load of other glasses is pure thug stupidity though. That was not an accident. It was an expression of 'doesn't give a fuck'.

I don't understand why you should be all pussyfooting around, careful of his feelings, downplaying the value of stuff, when he doesn't give a fig about either of your feelings or your stuff.

I agree.

I don't understand why you should be all pussyfooting around, careful of his feelings, downplaying the value of stuff, when he doesn't give a fig about either of your feelings or your stuff

Where has the OP said she's 'pussyfooting around, careful of his feelings, downplaying the value of stuff?'

I mean, it could be true, but so far, the OP just hasn't said any of this.

His attitude was not the best and he should of apologised but it was an accident. I’m quite shocked at the consequences post but that’s probably because DH and I between the pair of us have broke about 10 wine glasses, 4 pint glasses , a bowl and chipped a ridiculous amount of mugs. I’d be fuming if DH treated me like a child when I break something and the feeling would be mutual.

Well I was responding to other posters' responses, as well as to the OP @Thekindofwindowsfaceslookinatek

(Didn't realise I had to reference each remark fully and precisely, for my participation in the conversation to be judged adequate by other posters).

I've had to buy thick glass large tumblers that weigh a tonne because DH breaks every single f%#ing one! So far the strong ones have defeated him so... yay!

What really, really pissed me off though is that every time I bought a set, he'd accidentally (carelessly) smash them over a few months but whenever there is just one left, he uses that and I'm relegated to a half size child's glass with the children. He breaks them all but because he's a man, a penis owner, he should have the large glass with dinner?
One day I jumped in first and poured myself the last remaining large glass and handed him a kids one and he was not happy.

OP I sympathise. I hate when people are careful with their own stuff but bloody careless with yours.

@Warwicks have you checked the TKMaxx website? If they don't have any more in store the website might have them!

he should of apologised but it was an accident

See I don't consider getting the glass out by pulling on the stem to get past the other glasses an accident. It's carelessness. And it sounds like he makes a habit of it.

OP does he ever break any of his things?

Well I was responding to other posters' responses, as well as to the OP @Thekindofwindowsfaceslookinatek**

(Didn't realise I had to reference each remark fully and precisely, for my participation in the conversation to be judged adequate by other posters)

There's just no need for the snippy attitude.

You referred directly to the OP's situation in your first paragraph. It was absolutely not clear that your second paragraph then addressed the feelings of the entire thread.