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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how much child maintenance you receive.

309 replies

Sailingthroughtheweek · 02/07/2021 12:07

I’m wondering where DC and I fit on the spectrum, just out of interest.

I receive £300 per month for one DC.
He lives 100 miles away and does no childcare at all, so that pays for breakfast/ after school clubs, holiday clubs and a bit towards her hobbies.

I’m very, very glad to be in my current position and not still married, so I’m not moaning at all, and also, I earn more than him so I don’t need more, but a £300 contribution to our DC seems low.

OP posts:
TurnUpTurnip · 15/12/2021 08:06

Nothing at all.

BirthdayAtChristmas · 15/12/2021 08:09

£50 a month for 1 child supposedly but he pays as little as he can. Sees her EOW for 1 night but is starting to cancel that now she's 7.

I don't need it as I work, so she's not suffering and I'm glad not to be in a relationship with him anymore.

Lachimolala · 15/12/2021 08:09

Nothing for my eldest, he’s now 10 so that’s unlikely to change anytime soon. And £267 for my two youngest and he begrudges them every penny. I only have that because I got CMS involved.

Jessie75 · 15/12/2021 08:13

Ive been luckyish, always got cms, but he loads up his pension to avoid paying as much as he can.

Jessie75 · 15/12/2021 08:17

@Misslewis

Advice please - 7 month old son, his father was my childhood sweetheart….. we reconnected during lockdown, I fell pregnant, he wanted this as much as I did…. Yet he left me when I was 3 months pregnant, never checked in on me during my pregnancy, our son is now 7 months and he has seen him 2 times and shows zero interest and doesn’t communicate…. Is it even worth going to the CMS for money from him?????
Yes if he is employed PAYE
BigYellowHat · 15/12/2021 08:19

Zero. Owed thousands in arrears.

VioletUltraViolet · 15/12/2021 08:37

My ex pays £250 a month and has her every other weekend Friday-Sunday afternoon and every Wednesday evening. I pay £900 for her childcare which everyone says we should split but it’s on my contact days that I am choosing to work so I think that responsibility does fall on me.

Eddmr · 15/12/2021 09:05

A private arrangement, rubber stamped by the courts - For two children, £2000 per month + 2% increase per year until they have finished a first degree, including a gap year. He has them 2 nights per week. High earner that uses money to alleviate his guilt.

worriedatthemoment · 15/12/2021 10:08

My sil gets at best £30 a week for two and sometimes £0 and he has the kids maybe every couple weeks for a couple hrs

Shmithecat2 · 15/12/2021 10:12

@ChampagneWorries

If one of your friends is getting £1800 a month then its court ordered or a private arrangement between themselves.

CMS can take a max of £1400 a month regardless of if the father earns 1 million a month.

That's for one child. If I had 2 dc and dh and I weren't together, I'd get this.
To ask how much child maintenance you receive.
Fomofo · 15/12/2021 10:24

Nothing we just split expenses with open communication

twinkletwinkleangel · 15/12/2021 10:29

I get 30 pounds a week it's a disgrace!

Collaborate · 15/12/2021 10:41

This is such a pointless thread. There is no standard. Everyone earns different amounts, and - wait for it - some people earn nothing. Why are people so surprised that some people pay no or next to no child maintenance? Do you always have a go at people out of work and on benefits, or earning a very low wage?

MrsBerthaRochester · 15/12/2021 10:58

£320 a month for two dcs. We have three but as the eldest is 18 he doesnt count apparently.
I have contacted cms before and the amount he should be paying should be nearer £600 but I know it is pointless my chasing it up as he would find a way of not paying it (Financially abusive throughout marriage)

TurnUpTurnip · 15/12/2021 11:13

@Collaborate

This is such a pointless thread. There is no standard. Everyone earns different amounts, and - wait for it - some people earn nothing. Why are people so surprised that some people pay no or next to no child maintenance? Do you always have a go at people out of work and on benefits, or earning a very low wage?
Actually I don’t think it’s pointless, some people actively avoid working so they don’t have to pay like my ex So it’s not always people desperate for a job but can’t get one, and there seems to be a big belief that everyone receives child maintenance when that isn’t true for a lot of people
Rexthesnail · 15/12/2021 11:21

£221 for one child. 0 for the other, I could put a claim in and get £28pm but I don't want it. I want nothing from him.

daimbarsatemydogsbone · 15/12/2021 11:24

Zero. I have only just asked though and NRP says she will think about it and let me know in Jan

LJAKS · 15/12/2021 11:27

@Misslewis

Advice please - 7 month old son, his father was my childhood sweetheart….. we reconnected during lockdown, I fell pregnant, he wanted this as much as I did…. Yet he left me when I was 3 months pregnant, never checked in on me during my pregnancy, our son is now 7 months and he has seen him 2 times and shows zero interest and doesn’t communicate…. Is it even worth going to the CMS for money from him?????
Always worth it. If you don't feel you "need" it you take whatever you can get and squirrel it away for your wee person.
MorningStarling · 15/12/2021 11:33

As others have said the figures are decided by the NRP's income, the number of other children they are responsible for and the amount of contact they have with them.

If an NRP earns nothing, they won't pay anything. The CMS can't deduct money that isn't being earned.

This is a point many people seem to forget, they assume that the amount depends on what is needed. What's needed and what's available are not the same thing.

ancientgran · 15/12/2021 11:35

I have a GC living with me, I get a payment from each parent but it adds up to less than £300.

yoyo1234 · 15/12/2021 11:39

Threads like this (I find) are a warning that court agreed settlements seem the best way. I could not keep the DC on 10-15% of DHs salary due to childcare/education costs.

gogohm · 15/12/2021 11:42

I get £850, plus he pays DD's halls rent directly. I'm aware I'm fortunate! Private agreement

yoyo1234 · 15/12/2021 11:43

Could your friend on £1800 a month potentially have forgone a share of her ex's pension for the house and equity? I know this to be the case in at least 1 divorce I know about.

Theworldisquiethere · 15/12/2021 12:06

None
One child, he has him 2 nights a fortnight, he is working but refuses to tell CMS how much he’s earning.

Aimee1987 · 15/12/2021 12:10

DP pays 250 for 1 child. DSS is here about 40 % of the time so 5 out of 14 nights in terms and half holidays.
Also pays all his hobbies, half school uniforms, school outs ect.
He earns just under 30 k.