To think I won't need to plan our lives around naps?

[AnUnoriginalUsername]

We have a 7 week old baby. Just saw another thread and though "shit, nap schedules!"
Does everybody have set times and places for naps? Is it really important?
DS currently sleeps mostly on me but also in his rocking chair and sometimes in his cot. We cosleep.

Am I being insane to think he can just nap when he's tired wherever we are?

@BastardMonkfish

You don't decide what to do about naps. Your baby decides what they want to do and communicates this by being insufferable when they want to be napping and/or not sleeping a sensible amount at night when they don't like the balance you've tried to strike. They're the boss of you now, Godspeed!

This!!

Some babies don’t need nap routines
Others make your life a living hell if they haven’t had the right about of sleep at the right time

You may well get one of each if you have 2 DCs…

Yes, my two are 21 and 20 now so we are talking a long time ago. I was sure there had been an update. That said, they weren't using it unsupervised as it was mainly in the buggy/car seat where they couldn't turn, or when we were out and about visiting. Not used in the cot at night.

I wouldn't want to recommend something unsafe.

I had one who resisted naps- and sleep in general. I tried to get her into a schedule but she wasn’t having it. Then I had another one and thought ‘I am not even going to ATTEMPT a routine with this one, but he made his own routine. Took naps at the same times every day, for the same duration…you could set your clock by him!

Your baby is still brand new. I would go with whatever he wants to do for now. A routine might evolve over time, but if not, no problem as long as he is getting enough sleep overall. 🤷🏼‍♀️

I actually think it is good to try and get them into a routine going to their own bed at nap times if you can. Makes life so much easier for you but you have to start it early. But if your kid is chilled out and will nap anywhere without being up all night, I'd say go for it!

We went with the flow with ours and they napped anywhere, and have both slept through from a young age. I knew mine would go to nursery around the one year mark and not knowing their schedule, I didn’t want my kids to be stuck in a rigid routine which would make it difficult for them to settle.

Several friends had a strict schedule, had to be in a cot in a dark room, absolutely no wiggle room. Their kids are terrible sleepers.

A flexible sleeper is better for the parents IMO, so do what you can to encourage it.

My eldest needed a schedule, it suited him and he was out of sorts without it. He wouldn't sleep anywhere except in his cot. He is 8 now and still needs routine and stability.

My youngest....well she didn't nap - ever - so it didn't really matter. She is still the most awake person I have ever met, she is 4 and never ever ever gets tired.

So as others have said its not really down to you (although I would bet if you are a ftm you think it is - I did too) it is down to the individual personality of your baby.

None of my 3 ever had set nap times and never had their naps in their cots. Only ever in the buggy, car or on me.

We made his lay flat pram his nap place from the off. Meant we could go anywhere and he could still have his nap. The cot was for night time sleep

Ds1 would only ever nap in his cot - even as a baby - wouldn't fall asleep in the car or pram. Just wouldn't fall asleep.

When he was 8 months old, we went to Portugal on a night flight in the hopes that he'd sleep on the plane. We didn't put him down for a nap that day, and went to the airport. Our flight was delayed by 12 hours, and we finally arrived at our hotel late the next evening. He was still awake. For 36 whole hours - count em - we certainly did! Put him in his cot and he conked straight out.

Ds2 was more forgiving, and whilst he wouldn't nap in the pram, he would fall asleep in the car...

Depends on your baby - 7 wks is quite early on - you might need to just play it by ear & see how it goes!

I was determined to still get out & about when mine was little & he pretty much slept anywhere & everywhere - I was quite laid back about it. When he was a bit older, 1-2 yrs, he settled himself into an afternoon nap time & would happily go up to his cot & sleep for at 1-2 hrs, which was a godsend for me to get stuff done or have a bit of 'me time'! I wasn't obsessive about it though - if we had stuff to do or places to go, he'd just sleep in the car, in the pushchair or wherever - depending where we were.

We had the odd day where he was the devil's spawn because he'd either not slept at all or had too long & refused to sleep at night...ah, what fun that was! 😄

I think you need to just try not to stress about anything, do what you want to do & see how baby settles. Every baby is different & you need to do what's right for you- regardless of all the well meaning advice & opinions you'll undoubtedly get!!

Good luck! X

I remember MIL telling me that DD had to be flexible and sleep when I wanted. Thanks for that. However we were out once and she got to experience toddler DD without a nap. She was hell. I used to plan holiday days around naps, just made life easier to deal with

It’s not essential to have a nap schedule if you feel fine with flexibility about what time they go to sleep in the evening. If it’s important to you to get them down at a certain time for “adult time” then it might be helpful.

I had a strict schedule with my eldest and none with my youngest. Neither was wrong it’s what worked for them and us at the time.

Ive had 4 and ive never planned my life around naps! Big big mistake in my opinion to do that. I was definitely stricter with the bedtime routine but not naps! They just had a nap wherever we were at the time, home, car, pram etc.

From 3 months - 1.5 years, mine only slept on me, in the buggy or in my bed. From 1.5-2.5 years, he only sleeps in the buggy (still, flat) or in his cot. It is limiting, yes, but you just have to crack on with a morning and afternoon structure!