There are three people in our marriage

[Uptheqpr]

What do you do when there are three of you in your marriage ?

@Uptheqpr

What do you do when there are three of you in your marriage ?

You go shopping and choose the best 'revenge' dress you can!

My friend got a private detective( yes, they do exist) and paid him a few hundred. He took photos. All the evidence she needed she said it was the best money she ever spent. Then she went to a solicitor, moved some money and kicked him out next time he was ‘away ‘ with work when he came home his clothes were all in bin bags.

Get rid of one or exit myself.

Confront him! Don't like what you hear? Leave him! Move on to pastures new. Good luck 🤞

If he is acting like he doesn't want to be around you, take the initiative & end your... I would say marriage but in reality it isn't any more. Do your detective work, get a solicitor & next time he is away for any time pack his bags & kick him out. Get copies of payslips, bank statements, sort yourself some cash, the best way is get cashback every time you shop, it doesn't show on your bank statement, make sure you have things like birth & marriage certificates, driving licence & passport. He has checked out of your marriage, you don't need to be living on eggshells all the time, you & your dog will be fine together.

What marriage? In all seriousness, you don't have one. Your H has withdrawn himself from it and is now effectively just the lodger.

I'd call time on it and boot him out - he's not contributing much by the sound of it.

Is this a polygamy relationship?

@Uptheqpr ditch his ass.

@SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius

Sorry - the picture didn’t post. This is Mia, basking in the sun.

Aww what a lovely girl. ❤️

Head up, tits out,lippy on and go and find your own "friend" and let it be known you are doing so,Stop being so accepting and withdraw completely,if he feels threatened then its his own fault,Hasnt this pandemic taught us anything? It should that life is too short to have shitty people ruin our lives.Stop wondering why stop beating yourself up you have had 2 yrs of this crap,,please OP go start living and leave him and his "friend" to sort themseles out. He sounds a right contolling wimp who the hell does he think he is?.Time to look after you anf move on my darling,

I might kick two of them out

Try having four.

I have a child, I'm also in a relationship with a child, and his parents.

That’s five @Pastymamma010

Hahaha @waterlego you're right. It's late, I'm tired, and I clearly cannot count

You wait until the other one 'disappears' in some shape or form.

Then you get involved in charitable activities,

then eventually you get to become the Queen of England.

Ordinary values and morals such as truth, justice, and being faithful to your partner don't apply to you...

Hope OP is OK, if you are still reading I think you know he's already checked out and you should try to get some self esteem back and leave. You're never going to be happy in a situation like this

Take time to find out what options you have in terms of rights/what you can make work and financial support. Bide your time and then the time is right either kick him out or move out yourself (with minimal notice).

Don't facilitate it.

I hear ya @Pastymamma010. I’ve also just realised this is a bit of an oldish thread.

Hopefully the OP has found a way to deal with her situation.

When it was my MIL who came first I got divorced. Not the only reason but a part of it.

Not a MIL is it, we need to know more op

Oh goodness , you haven’t got a good marriage I’d get a divorce I certainly wouldn’t put up with that Op

So your counsellor advised you to see things from his angle? I'm not sure that is good advice.

In fact I fear you have run into one of the shit counsellors out there who don't reckon with domestic/gendered power imbalances and pretend there are two sides to every story when one person is clearly being an asshole. To me it sounds like you need to start protecting yourself.

@Fromage

Boot the other two to kingdom fuck and take a much younger lover.

Best response I have EVER read 😁

Christ for your own mental health and sanity please leave...