How much does your job play on your mind?

[Changnsme53ew]

NC for this as I don’t want to get too identifiable

Just as title says really, even when not at work I constantly think of work. I keep checking my emails and when I do get an email I get a sinking feeling and have to read it whilst dreading what it will say.

I don’t remember feeling like this in my previous places of work. Not sure if it’s a mixture of having kids and working part time (previous to kids I was full time in a different place), not sure if it’s just anxiety or if it’s actual normal or maybe just the workplace I’m in. Most people I work with look stressed out all the time so I don’t think it’s just me.

I work in a secondary school btw. I went to speak to headteacher today as things I need to do job not given to me so needed his help getting things moving. He asked me if I had other interests outside of work and what I do to relax! That got me thinking maybe I am letting work play on my mind too much. I feel a bit embarrassed by his comment for some reason like it was negative.

Not sure what I’m looking for by posting this, I just feel like I need an outside opinion on this. I feel really stressed out all the time. Anyone else feel like this about their job?

Too bloody much.

I wake between 3-4am most mornings worrying about work and can't get back to sleep for ages. My alarm then goes off at 6am so I can run and de-stress before logging on at 8am.

Everyone knows how crap it is and most of my team are working 10 hour days but we just have to get stuff done. Work in FE and it's horrendous due to COVID.

Teacher. Love the actual teaching. Work in a toxic type of environment. A lot of mocking and unprofessional behaviour that's not stamped on by management. Favouritism. Makes me unhappy everyday.

A lot of these posts are education related. Schools, he, fe and social care.

I realise that I am very lucky. I love my job, and can switch off when I switch my computier off.

@livingthegoodlife

I used to. It bothered every aspect of my life so much that I resigned.

Sorry that's probably not the answer you wanted to hear. The sinking feeling of opening emails. The dread of the phone ringing etc. All gone now.

I've just recently quit a job that was unbelievably stressful too. And I'm made of fairly stern stuff, having worked in a similar line for nearly 20 years, but this was something else. First time I've ever quit anything and it feels great.

All the time. I love it, though.

I made myself a rule no work stuff after 5pm... today got a l message at 7pm about shit that isn’t happening until Monday so what the hell was the point in messaging me if it can wait.... I replied at 9:45 and said sorry for late reply I’m in the pub and yes I can talk to you about x on Monday !!! I’m actually at home watching gogglebox

Not at all since I left teaching

Working for the police now and my mind is completely blank when I clock off until the next shift. So happy.

I'm awake now because of work. I'm beginning to hate it. Not just my current place of work; I'm not sure I'm cut out for the job in general.

I want to quit but I'm pregnant and I'm getting enhanced maternity pay so I can't. And I'll be stuck there for a year after, at least.

I knew you'd be a teacher.

I teach primary. It's on my mind all the time.

I feel dread every morning when I wake up and all the things I need to do that day start running through my head. I really need a career change but don't know where to begin.

Solicitor. All the time. Can so rarely switch off.

[quote Changnsme53ew]@Firsttimebuyer1 what are u doing now? I have no idea what to do if I ever leave. This is all I’ve done so far[/quote]
I did another degree and am now a play therapist. I love it!

Yes, but normally only in the hours just after work. After I’ve logged off for the day I can’t help but check my emails on my phone to see if my boss (who works late most days) has sent anything over. It’s a bit contradictory as I like to know what I’m going into the next day, but equally if there’s something there then I start thinking about it in the evening. But then if I don’t check, and something big catches me off guard when I next log on, it really throws me off. Having work emails on my phone is a double edged sword in that way.

However normally after a couple of hours have passed it does leave my thoughts and i switch off for the evening. I also don’t get push notifications for work emails, I have to log into an app to check them - so at least they aren’t popping up on my phone while I’m doing over things or my mind is elsewhere.

I was you. Every Friday I put a out of office on my email. I took my work email off my phone. I NEVER look at it out if my contracted hours. My family and mental health has been so much better.

I think it is a personality thing also because I can be like this too- I feel like I cannot relax until I have planned a chunk of the next year so even though I just broke up 2 weeks ago for my 9 week summer break I am still wired thinking about planning for next year when I am transitioning to a different role and I will only be teaching the first 90 mins of every day. It makes me feel very guilty as I want to be more present for my kids. Try not to be too hard on yourself and cut out chunks of the day when you will be present with your kids.

Think teaching / frontline public sector is demanding.

My mum had a hard NHS frontline job (full time) and was brilliant (IMO) at ‘compartmentalising’, but working hard in difficult circumstances at work and doing the bulk of domestics at home did take a big toll on her health.

Think it was dismissive and manipulative of your head to make that comment, turning your request for specific action you’d suggested, around on you. The late notification of lessons being observed was v poor too.

Challenging you on ‘as my kids are so young I’m failing them by not being present here and now with them’. If by ‘being present’ you mean not WoH! Fathers don’t have these concerns!

If you mean detaching more from work when at home, there’re loads of practical things you could try.

Rarely. I'm pretty good at switching off when I'm not working. I work in HE.

I knew you were going to be a teacher (from the thread title) and lots of other replies from teachers too. I’m a primary teacher, I’ve actually been on maternity leave since February and I still think about it every day- the work etc but also the kids. I work in an area of high deprivation and some of the kids are very vulnerable, I’m also the SENCO (a colleague covering this role while I’m on leave) and I think all the time about how the kids are getting on.

Yes, I do think about work outside my work hours but I don’t really mind. When I am doing my hobby (tennis), I actually switch off from thinking about all worries and responsibilities which is why I like it so much. It helps to have a passion outside work for some relief.

It's really not just teaching. I work for local government and completely recognise this feeling.

I did some CBT when off work due to stress last year and there were some good tips about setting boundaries and changing your thought patterns when you realise you are expending mental energy worrying over something that doesn't merit that level of anxiety. Mulling over a problem in the shower is one thing. Lying awake at night because your brain is whirring and your heart racing is another. I'm slowly getting better at recognising the feeling and nipping it in the bud.

Setting clear boundaries is definitely part of it. Set times for checking emails if necessary, and stay off them the rest of the time. And I'd also go mental at someone that thought it was OK to notify me about something important for Tuesday at 5:45pm on the Friday of a bank holiday weekend. That was not your fault.

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City job. All the time. It is intrusive but I accept it because I'm compensated for it well. Though I too have it as a rule in our office that nothing but good news goes out on Friday afternoon. If urgent - jump on a call. If not, it can wait for Monday.

My husband - public sector. Once he switches off his computer, that's it.

Absolutely. I worry all the time, and I'm in a poorly-paid non-professional job in a charity. There's so much pressure at the moment, IMHO mainly caused by the organisation itself.

I used to be in education (post 16) and although it was gruelling and with long hours, I found it easier in many ways than what I'm doing now.

I feel sick logging on to work on a Monday, so I do some work on a Sunday so Monday's not so much of a shock.

Secondary Headteacher

SHED LOADS!!!

Don't need to say say more!

I locum and work with kids with life limiting conditions. Its the families and the children that play on my mind. Without sounding dramatic I can see a child one week and the next they have passed away. Equally I can see a child whose diagnosis means they have a very limited life length grow into adulthood. Makes you realthe fragility and miracle of life There is lots of paperwork but that is just par for the course.