Soft play. Lack of supervision

[mysterytoddler]

I take my 19 month old DD to soft play most weeks since they’ve reopened. I’m 7 months pregnant with DC2.

I’m so sick of parents not supervising their kids properly. Today was a classic. Another mum with 2 boys, at a guess I’d say that the oldest was 7, youngest 3. Both really boisterous kids. The mum spent most of the time sat at her table on her phone. She checked on them now and again but mostly left them to it. At one point she even took the toddler to the toilet and left the older one completely unsupervised.
I took DD to the large bit of the soft play that’s recommended for older ones which is my own doing but DD is really headstrong and finds the baby bit really boring now. But they were running all over the place and she got knocked over twice.

I also don’t understand why the 7 year old wasn’t at school. Part of the reason we go on weekdays is because it’s quieter and usually full of toddlers. I wouldn’t go on weekends cos I accept that there will be school age kids there.

I’m just sick of it. I manage to clamber all over the equipment and supervise my toddler despite being heavily pregnant. I don’t understand why it’s so difficult for others to do the same

This is how it is when you have babies or young toddlers. You have to shadow them at soft play. Believe me, the day where you can sit down and have a coffee and let them play is magical.
Of course, I lost that by having a third child. So my 4 and 6 year olds have to charge about unsupervised while I walk the 1 year old round and it's pretty crap

I miss soft play. Most areas of Scotland haven't had them reopen yet. Our local is for children up to age 12 so I'd definitely keep a toddler in the toddler area.

Children will bump into each other and it’s part of them learning. Like falling over etc. On a soft play environment they are unlikely to be particularly hurt if they fall over, that’s the joy of the place! It doesn’t sounds like your child was knocked over on purpose or by older children being mean / naughty. If my child was knocked over at that age I would have just said ‘oh dear, up you get. Maybe it’s a bit busy in this bit’ and moved somewhere else.

I'm starting to think this is a wind up or a reverse.

@Aria999

I'm starting to think this is a wind up or a reverse.

Oh totally, but the scary thing is, these parents are out there!

Today is teacher training day for a lot of London primary boroughs so that might be why!

Also late twenties is not very young lol

You can't be serious? A 7 year-old can be left alone while their mother takes the toddler to the toilet in the softplay ffs.

YOU had your child in the older kids area. You say you were there because your child is "head strong" I.e you can't get her to do as she's told, yet your complaining about other people bot controlling their children. Oh the irony!
Also, what does her age have to do with anything. She may not even have been the children's mother. Childminder, sister, babysitter.

You are the person in the wrong. Get a grip!

Also, none of your business why the children weren't at school.

Yabu.

My dc are older now, so I've been all the ages in soft play and my biggest bug bear by far is what you did. I'd prefer an unsupervised 3&7 yr old over a blooming parent helping her too young child in an area not meant for them.

If your blooming child can't go in the soft play area unsupervised amd unhelped, they shouldn't be in that section.

Let's wait and see if you're taking your child to the toilet with you in the softplay when they are 7.

You are unable to keep your “headstrong” 19 month old in the age appropriate section of soft play so you expect parents of older children to run around and helicopter theirs?

You are being very unreasonable.

How do you know she wasn't working on her phone? Or are you just assuming because you don't think people who have kids before their late 20s have decent jobs (but simultaneously must work because they can't possibly stay at home to homeschool)

No chance I'm running around chasing my 6 year old in soft play. You go to soft play so they run around and burn steam of. Don't take a baby in the big bit

Well, you'll soon have two DC's and can show us all how it's done eh ?

Joking aside, I do think your little one being knocked over is obviously shite. I'd like to think my 6yo would know better and my 3yo is usually the one I choose to supervise as he is quite young for his age iyswim and I don't leave him to it, so if he knocked a toddler over, he'd be in trouble as I'd see it.

I've also approached mums and told them if their DCs are behaving like little fuckers badly. It happens! My 6yo is an absolute delight (naturally), but occasionally, I do catch her being unkind when she doesn't think I can hear or see her and I tell her off. So if someone told me, civilly, that she'd done something to another DC, I'd appreciate it and make her apologise or take her home. Most parents do. Occasionally not and I've had some lazy mums glaring and sulkily dragging themselves off their bums to supervise their kid, but at least they do it, even with the attitude. Obviously, if you live somewhere like where I grew up, where there are genuinely dangerous people around, you might be more wary, but generally, I tell them if one of their DCs is being a bit of a terror and they usually are really apologetic. Obviously only if they're doing something quite bad like repeatedly knocking over a tiny toddler with a heavily pregnant mum.

I’ve had a lot of experience with soft play as I used to take my child every week since he was a baby. Once an older child (about 5 but probably had learning difficulties) purposely pushed my just waking 10 month old flat on his face, this was in the space between the play bits. Admittedly, I was irritated but that’s just life with kids. Although I was angry, I couldn’t justify being pissed off with the parent who had only just sat down. I told the child “it’s not nice to push”. If someone else’s kid is being too boisterous then you need to get used to giving them a firm word if the parent isn’t around. The older kids area will always be boisterous, you decided to take your 19 month old in so it’s your responsibility to keep her safe as she’s too young to go in on her own. It also makes no difference if you think the older child should be in school, maybe they’re homeschooled or maybe their school isn’t open.

People like you really irritate me. There are loads of play areas for littlies around here. There is one adventure playground for older kids with signs saying it's suitable for 8+. Yet it is always filled with small children and their parents 'supervising'. Last time we were there my ds waited the best part of 5 mins for a kid and dad to climb down a ladder. It just makes it completely unusable as a play area for kids. See also the BMX track that parents allow their toddlers to run around while kids with bikes who might actually want to use the track are made to wait.
You talk about her parenting her child but you are allowing your child into an area which you admit she shouldn't be because she is headstrong...

Yes, I've also done the "Oh dear, you just knocked her over ...ah, see minisylvie, he's sorry. Let's keep playing".

I'm sorry but 19m old is far too young for the bigger section! It's absolutely fine to leave a 7 year old to take a 3 year old to the toilet.

She should have been supervising the 3 year old, a child that age often won't wait their turn fairly for a slide etc and needs oversight. But by school age they should need minimal supervision at a soft play. DS is 4.5 and I can absolutely send him in with his friend and not need to be with him constantly!

This has to be a wind up. If not, you’re an arsehole.

Honestly, children don't NEED to be supervised at soft place. Its soft. The entire place is soft! They can't hurt themselves. The building is totally kid-friendly and secure. It's very safe. That's why people go! It's not like they're playing outside or at risk of getting lost/injured etc. The whole point is that it's a place where kids play safely and parents relax with a coffee or something. Children are allowed to be near each other without their parents hovering over each child to make sure neither child touches the other one. If your child gets knocked down - so?! The place is entirely soft and also packed with staff whose sole purpose it to keep an eye on the kids! I haed to go to a soft play as a kid with my grandad and also various parents of my friends, they didn't once 'supervise' aka awkwardly hover around and follow us for no clear reason, not one of them. If I go to a soft play there's no way I'm going to follow them around the thing to male sure they don't accidentally knock another child onto the soft, safe, bouncy floor 😂

(I'm talking about parents of older kids, of course. As a parent to a toddler, YOU have to supervise because toddlers need supervision everywhere. The other mum did nothing wrong)

@mysterytoddler

No but it shows what could happen if kids are left unsupervised

That child is 17 months old, why was SHE not supervised? Most people here haven’t advocated leaving a toddler to play alone.

I let my 2 and 4 year old go round soft play by themselves. They stick together (because they enjoy each others company) and are capable of coming to find me if they need to.

I wouldn't do it at just any soft play though- the one I pick I can see most areas from the seating area.

You were in the wrong area of the soft play for your child's age and development. Its like having a picnic in a football pitch and getting grumpy whenever a ball comes close.

Oh and if you can't leave your 7 year old in a enclosed, kid friendly space for 5 minutes whilst you take another kid into the next room for a wee then something has gone drastically wrong with their upbringing (SEN etc excluded, of course )