She seems older for her age

[Justsawagecko]

My toddler Dd. She’s almost 3 but has crazy vocabulary..using words like ‘Absolutely’ ‘Broadcasting’ ‘Besides’ etc. She hears something and it just seems to stick in her mind, she knows what it means too. Ever since she was around 1.5, her language just took off and we’ve had normal conversations ever since. She crawled & walked fairly late, but just seems so attuned to things and like an older child in a toddlers body in many ways. It worries me for the future, is this normal?

@Seeingadistance What other signs were there?

@MarkRuffaloCrumble I was being tongue in cheek, but you missed that.

I was like this, I think because we did not do a lot of separating children by age or separating children from adults in my family or neighbourhood, so I was often in the midst of a range of conversations.

Both my DDs have always been good with words/vocab. One was an early talker/late walker. The other was the opposite. They both ended up the same by the time they started school.

Both still wordy in their own ways but neither outstanding academically.

Me and DH are both wordy but not really bright. We did the bedtime reading etc but not so much of the babytalk and I think that might be a factor.

About liking adults more than peers, I think it’s quite common with only children, at least by what I have seen with my nephew and niece and DDs peers. But don’t overthink that, because by y6/y7 school friends are far more important than parents.

It sounds like you have an inkling that there may be neuro-divergence. And there may/not be, but you do need to give it a little bit more time.

At 3, I would try and get as much time playing with others at your house or the park (you might have to be v hands on). It won’t always end well. DD2 was shocking at sharing/playing but is now the opposite.

But don’t worry too much, she will be what she will be. Introvert/extrovert, neuro typical/divergent. Sporty/academic.

Focus on resilience, kindness, humour, good manners. All those things are so much more important in the long run.

I was being tongue-in-cheek btw because A Level is Advanced Level; that’s what the ‘A’ stands for. I would hope that a teacher teaching English A level would have an a Level in it, I’ve never heard of advanced A level but then perhaps I’m not advanced enough to know of it

There is always something to worry about with our little ones but as tricky has said, they will be what they will be. My son's speech is insane and he spoke early and people often said he has "old man" language. He is also very imagery oriented (,am so angry am like thunder! After bring upset at child minder). And obsessed with solar system to the point of knowing about characteristics of each planet, birth of stars, dwarf planets. He is also strangely lacking in focus except on trains (obsessed with locomotives he knows their numbers n makes) and space of course. I used to worry about whether he is neuro divergent. Now I say he will be what he will be. And hopefully he will have a supportive community around him

@Letsallscreamatthesistene

A thinly veiled brag post if ever ive seen one.

@theleafandnotthetree

Christ where are all you geniuses with your genius children? I have never met a child anything like what is being described here, let alone multiples of them ( and sometimes 2, 3 or 4 in one family!). My own are academically pretty able but I think theres a touch of hyperbole going on here

If it helps my DS1 was completely different from DS2 as he barely talked and his younger brother (13 months apart) was speaking in sentences while he still wasn't.

He is the more academic of the two, averaging over 90% in everything on his Computer Science Masters. DS2 who talked in sentences at 13 months and whose first word was "yellow" at about 7 months is doing perfectly well at Uni but not as academic. He was diagnosed as Dyspraxic at age 17. DS1 had an initial assessment for aspergers at about age 11 and was told that he'd likely be borderline so we didn't progress - he still barely speaks.

Neither DH or I are geniuses but are probably above average.

@NCjourno

Meh.. I was reading the Guardian upside down at that age.

I didn't amount to much.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

They are all different! My twins were using really long words at age 3 or 4, but sadly no-one could tell because of their speech delay! In reception they got top marks for 'language for life' test because they could understand everything but no-one could understand then. Now they are 10 people can understand them and they will use long words!

My son aged 2.5 uses language like this. He’s always been quick at talking and likes to describe his many dinosaurs by their true names. He describes himself as excited, things as fantastic, moments as scary. He knows all colours and numbers to 20 in two languages (multi-lingual household, no brag). I thought he was some genius, until I took him to a toddler group today and a little girl a year younger than him successfully fetched some water and poured it from one jug to another, while ds couldn’t master walking the jug to the table without spilling it (and he started walking at 9 months). Some kids are better at different stuff. He also absolutely refuses the potty, but has declared the Triceratops as his favourite dinosaur! His language is great but he struggles with so much. I feel like language is his flex haha! From what I’ve seen with ds, a lot of it evens out the older they get.

My kiddo does that too. She’s 2 and told me something funny I said was “a lovely joke.” Similarly casually uses 3-4 syllable words correctly regularly. It’s advanced language for sure but all kids are different and it’s just the way she’s developed.

Why would this be worrying you, you should be pleased. Lots of children this age are adept at words and talking well, if a parent/parents,talks to the all the time in a grown up manner.

She will level off and just be normal.

Early language skills, when coupled with other areas of developmental delay, can very much be an early sign of neurodivergence.

It could also be ADHD/ADD. I had very advanced language skills because I loved to "hyperfocus" on books and was able to read from age three and also spell any word correctly that I had only seen once. My life turned out perfectly fine, so not being NT isn't the end of the world. Sensitivity to sounds, noise and introversion are also common symptoms of ADHD.

You might just want to keep an eye out for executive function issues or anxiety/mood disorders. I was extremely messy and disorganised as a child, and struggled with anxiety in my teens & 20s because I always felt I might be missing or forgetting something. Ironically I overcompensated by trying to do everything perfectly so I actually excelled in school & work.

Both ASD and ADD fall on a wide spectrum so there's no point worrying too much about your child now. She's clearly excelling in some areas so try to enjoy that and don't let it become a problem unless other issues come up. My husband has ASD and I have ADD, and only realised this as adults. Both of us are clearly on the "mild" end but definitely fit all the criteria for the neurological differences in thinking & behaviour. We have very normal lives, probably even privileged, by most standards. We managed to turn our specific interest/hyperfocus topics into good careers (in different fields). We also have a DD(2) together so I'm obviously keeping a very close on eye for NT symptoms but I'm not worried since I know that it doesn't mean your life can't be normal and enjoyable in many ways.

OP if you are worried, get your daughter assessed. My DS had very advanced vocab and preferred adults. He was diagnosed with ASD aged 8. I knew there were problems as his behaviour wasn’t like other kids. But everyone told me I was the problem and that he was fine. Until he wasn’t, and the school actually started listening. We initially had an Ed psych assessment and she was horrified and said he almost certainly had ASD, so we had him properly assessed and he was diagnosed. I wish I’d trusted my own instincts sooner.

@ByeClare

I was being tongue-in-cheek btw because A Level is Advanced Level; that’s what the ‘A’ stands for. I would hope that a teacher teaching English A level would have an a Level in it, I’ve never heard of advanced A level but then perhaps I’m not advanced enough to know of it

I don't know if it still exists but there was an option to do an extra paper when I did my English A-level. I can't remember what it was called - maybe the extended paper or something?

You had to read much more widely than the standard set texts, and there weren't any set texts, just quite general essay questions you had to choose which bits of your reading to use to answer. I read Anna Karenina, Heart of Darkness, Things Fall Apart, and King Lear. Probably others. I seem to remember writing an essay about nature imagery.

Can't remember where my keys are though.

NCjourno

Meh.. I was reading the Guardian upside down at that age.

I didn't amount to much“

🤣

I echo what PPs have said, that if you’re concerned you should get your DD assessed. It doesn’t sound to me as if there’s anything wrong from what you’ve said.

That would really worry me too OP you poor flower. What a dilemma having a child that can talk.

@FreezerBird cheers that's interesting, never heard of that. My DC's doing A Level English (literature) and that's not an option, and I did it too a long time ago but again no extension papers. But you probably did yours in the time in between DC and I - after they jiggled around with A Levels after I did them, and before they jiggled around with them again before DC started their A Level course.

Doesn't make sense that an English teacher could do such an extension as a one-off though!

My husband was saying words like "erroneously" at 3 according to my (usually non braggy) MIL. He got full marks at 11+ then...left high school without any a levels and has done fairly well in life but was absolutely shit academically. I wouldn't worry, kids develop at different ages.

@DeflatedGinDrinker How incredibly witty you are 👏 read the whole thread and perhaps work on being a better person.

Mine was the same at that age! Her vocabulary used to amaze me - still does, and she’s ten! But as a pp said, we never did the baby talk with her at all (recently she’s started calling horses ‘horsies’ which she’s picked up from a toddler nearby and it drives me crackers cos she’s never used baby talk before!!) And she was one who was slow to walk!! She’s just a very normal child who’s progressing well at school - her teacher likes to leave her story writing til last to mark though, as she knows she’ll be in for a treat!!