She seems older for her age

[Justsawagecko]

My toddler Dd. She’s almost 3 but has crazy vocabulary..using words like ‘Absolutely’ ‘Broadcasting’ ‘Besides’ etc. She hears something and it just seems to stick in her mind, she knows what it means too. Ever since she was around 1.5, her language just took off and we’ve had normal conversations ever since. She crawled & walked fairly late, but just seems so attuned to things and like an older child in a toddlers body in many ways. It worries me for the future, is this normal?

Firstly, embarrassing @Bertiebiscuit…

Secondly, @Letsallscreamatthesistene this post: Im alright with that if im honest makes me feel sorry for you as you must be very unhappy or very unfulfilled as a person... cue defensive post about how brilliant everything is

@lilyofthewasteland This is why I’m unsure

@Winterwoollies Was thinking the same 😞

The unjust thing, I like to call ‘little Greta Thunberg’, I totally agree all children are highly attuned to unfairness, but when you have an Aspie it’s a bit like you’re at a tribunal or court of law it’s so intense! Mine also had terrible endings to play dates and parties regularly, again I know this isn’t necessarily unusual but after a while of noticing my DS was always doing it more regularly and more violently than any other child I couldn’t just dismiss it as normal…It has got loads better though, because little ones with ASD can also be fantastic learners, and mine even at 5 is understanding how to manage the situations he finds tricky. The hearing issues you mention OP also sound really familiar to me, again little people do generally have really sensitive ears, but it can be different with ASD kids because it’s not really about volume, but sensory processing and you notice that difference as a parent even without knowing exactly what it is. I so related to your post, OP as my recent experience started from a similar place of worrying about things everyone else was not worried about! And it could well be that you do have nothing to worry about! It’s important to know official diagnoses with high-functioning ASD can take years, so you have to be okay with a bit of uncertainty. I got to a point with my DS when it just became easier to accept he probably was as tailoring our life to that made things much better, but we didn’t get there for a long time. And now we’re there we are all pretty happy in our half neurodiverse half neurotypical madhouse xxx

@99Marbles She’s due to start nursery/pre school part time in September. We’ve been deciding between a couple we like. When we went to view one of them a couple of weeks ago, one of the classroom’s was full of children and very noisy (as they can be) Dd was quite affronted by it and was complaining and putting her hands over her ears saying how noisy it was, she was getting cross about it. We’re not choosing that particular nursery, for other reasons, but it did make me worry if she’ll be ok, as obviously classrooms will have noise 🥲I just want to know she’ll be ok, feeling bit sad about it, but I know I don’t know for sure yet. It’s all wrapped up in having to leave her properly for the first time (has been at hone with me) but knowing I won’t be there if she gets upset.
She also was almost brazen in her confidence, walking up and taking things out of pots, trying to get glitter out etc, when she wasn’t supposed to, I don’t know, perhaps this is just toddlers!

*Home

Again, trying to open pots, commenting on noise in a new place. All sounds really normal.

@Justsawagecko I do hope you find the right nursery for your little one.Its such an important decision isn’t it? And that first day when you leave them 😌. She may get used to the noise, but then again she may not and only you can make the decision of where is right for her.

You came on here with concerns about your precious child , not bragging ( I was about Oxbridge ...and am not ashamed of that) , but asking for advice and support .I don’t post on MN very often , but I feel that some of the posters on here have treated you very unfairly. Sending love x

@Dishwashersaurous ..yes reaction to noise seems to be quite normal, particularly for an only child perhaps .

I hated loud noises as a kid OP, and I do not have autism. I just had sensitive ears and they used to scare me. She’s also not used to the classroom environment so it may have been overwhelm from that, too. I know you will but support her and follow her lead, whoever she is, and champion her. If you do have any concerns, get the ball rolling now as it can take a long time and you may feel better knowing you’re finding out and not ‘in stasis’ worrying.

She will be okay! In the long run nursery /preschool / school really helps as this is where they learn how to be in the world with others…but if I were you I’d identify a member of staff once she’s settled that she / you particularly like and tell her some of the things you’re a bit worried about? Given your concerns part-time will be a really good balance for her too.

I havent read all the responses, I'm sorry.

My daughter was late to speak, but then quickly developed a very broad vocabulary. She still has an amazing vocabulary for her age (10, not so far off 11) and is "above expected " with literacy at school. She still struggles with peer relationships, repetitive behaviour, anxiety, regulating emotions.
This week she has been diagnosed (after a loooong wait) with ASD.

and I did suspect she was a little different from very early on... but though initially it was just motor skills and some immaturity. Other difficulties became more apparent as she got older. I have been worried about her for years though, since she was pre school age I think.

My niece was an adult in a toddlers body it has been very beneficial to her, she is mature organised and confident now at 19.

My 3 year old is the same. She is so articulate and has great vocabulary

She picks it all up from YouTube and the tv 😀

I don't understand why you are trying to analyse and label your TWO YEAR OLD... n

@Dishwashersaurous Yes, hope so, I guess it’s just too early to tell

@DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep What other things worried you when she was very little?

@andora82 Not trying to label her, just looking for some advice on things I’ve noticed..plus, she’s 3 in a couple of weeks.

@Drivingmeupthewall Yes, you’re right, it is all new to her 💜

@bossybloss Thank you, that’s really kind 🤗x

[quote Bananasinpyjamas21]@ByeClare Being articulate is not a sign of autism. Your DD may well have been like this, however there is no evidence that it is a ‘sign’ as all it shows is that her brain was processing language very well.

Yes any developmental delay is worth following up. The OP has not described anything out of the normal range of development delay

However being good at language is not a red flag for anything and there is no reason to suggest this to the OP.

It also subscribes to the stereotype that autistic children are bright but quirky and articulate. This is a damaging stereotype for many who are minimally verbal. The vast majority of autistic people have significant language difficulties. One third have limited or no speech, it is not an ‘array’ it is a significant part of autism. Until the term ‘aspergers’ was done away with - and autism used instead - autism was only used for those with language delay (asperger’s was used for those without a language delay).

Btw you might not want to use the term ASD as many find it offensive to be described as having a disorder. ASC is more respectful as it describes autism as a condition rather than a disorder.[/quote]
You and I clearly have some different views on this, and that is OK.

However mirroring my language in your last para to snipe at me is shitty. The use of the term 'neurodivergent' is not comparable to the usage of the term 'ASD', which is a widely used medical term. I made it clear that I'm neurodiverse that I'm part of that community, so I would appreciate you respecting when I'm saying how people like me often like to be referred to as. I said I don't mind the term 'neurodivergent', but tbh I only don't mind it when it's someone else who is ND who is using it. That's my right to say. I have some ownership/relationship to the term 'neurodivergent' as it could be used to describe me; since you haven't said you have autism and presumably would have done so in this discussion, you do not have the same ownership or relationship to the term/acronym ASD.

And if you are going to complain about the usage of the term ASD, perhaps don't use it in your first post on this thread

Doesn't sound like you have cause for worry.
Sounds like you have a clever girl who you can connect with and nurture.
My DD now 8 started talking very clearly at 9 months, didn't start walking til 14 months, but walked everywhere from age 3 when the buggy was too heavy and annoying to push. It's great. We didn't go through terrible 2s tantrums because she could articulate what she wanted and understand what we said back. We had some threenager moments when she was pushing boundaries about what she was allowed to do. (Keep her off screens as much as possible before it becomes an addictive habit. They learn how to do everything on an iPad or phone way before they understand what is safe content to access.)
DD started reception very confident and happy because she could communicate and understand things well and engage with learning. Play phonics games and songs and encourage the building blocks of reading so she can enjoy her firm grasp of a broad vocabulary.

Kids don't play together well until they are nearly 6. In their minds, the whole world revolves around themselves so other kids are sometimes uninteresting, or a threat to getting what they want. Sharing and taking turns and figuring out what's fair doesn't really click until they are nearly 6.
Getting attention from grownups makes them feel special and they don't have to worry about having to share their toys with adults.
Continue to engage with your articulate daughter, introduce her to books and music and arts and crafts, and dance and sports and nature, play games with numbers and colours and shapes as you go about your day. Continue to provide stimulation and challenges and enrichment so you can enjoy watching her explore and discover the activities that make her feel happy and proud.

Th

I read your first post and thought that sound like my DD. Then ima few more and you are basically describing my DD’s first few years of life! Identical! And I knew there was something different about her from the second she could crawl! She was diagnosed with ADHD when she was 8. She’s as bright as a button and never fails to entertain us with her quirky ways! X