To ask what you think of weighing children in school

[cadburyegg]

Discussion on our school groups about the possibility of weighing children restarting as it was halted in March 2020. Lots of parents think it’s shameful and unnecessary, some are of the opinion that it’s “just for statistics” and can also be useful to see what centile your child is at.

I’m on the fence tbh. What are your thoughts?

Dreadful, and means that heavier children will be bullied.

I went to a hockey match a couple of years ago. The keeper was the child who is quite overweight. One of the parents , known for being super bitchy and cliquey anyway, said "oh well of course it's X in goal, it would be because he's huge, look at the size of him...you know he weighs almost DOUBLE what my son does?!". Another parent said she couldn't say things like that and asked her how she knew that anyway. The response from nasty bitchy mother came "oh they weighed them in science last week and my son came home and told me the results."

So not only did her son bully this overweight child because the weights were all known in class, but this mother was using the info to be openly nasty about him too. When challenged about it, she replied "well it's a good thing he knows, and that his parents know, at least they might, you know , DO something about it now".

I have chosen never to speak to the mother concerned again as I no longer wanted to be part of her spitefulness toward other children and parents. She is well known as being a class A bitch anyway who thinks she is a lot better and nicer than she really is. But this shows why weighing children at school "in the name of science" is outdated and should not be allowed.

The weights are only sent to the parents. They aren’t screamed out in front of everyone!

I think it’s a useful national exercise and had no issues with my DC being done. It was rather pointless at my old school though as the parents of the children who were overweight declined to let their children be weighed so the overall feedback was that 100% of the Y6s were a healthy weight. Rather pointless really.

Redheadonascooter, 3 breakfasts on a scooter seems excessive at 5, no wonder she will end with a food issue later

**Do they take height into consideration too? My son is 94th centile for weight and height, the health visitor said that means he is fine, just tall. I wonder when he gets to school age he will be heavier than average because of his height?

My son is very thin, there is absolutely no weight he could possibly lose!**

Yes because they calculate it with height, weight and age.

However, some overfed children do grow a lot taller so they are on higher weight and height centiles.

No I wouldn’t be happy for my child to be weighed. My child wouldn’t be happy with being weighed either. I wouldn’t give permission.

Do they do this in reception?

I'd be happy to because I'm the parent and I don't want to be setting my child up for health/weight problems (like I had as a child) so if an external 'body' said she was overweight I'd take it on board and try and change it. I know with children every child so different and the margins are small which makes it difficult.

Dreadful, and means that heavier children will be bullied.

They don't read out the results, obviously 🙄

@Flowerlane

No I wouldn’t be happy for my child to be weighed. My child wouldn’t be happy with being weighed either. I wouldn’t give permission.

@Flowerlane - just wondered why? Particularly your young, primary aged child - why would they even think it’s a problem being weighed? Are they overweight? Surely they just stand out more being the odd one out who is not getting weighed and the weight is communicated privately directly to you.

Do they do this in reception?

Yes they do it in reception and yr6

@Justgettingbye

Do they do this in reception?

I'd be happy to because I'm the parent and I don't want to be setting my child up for health/weight problems (like I had as a child) so if an external 'body' said she was overweight I'd take it on board and try and change it. I know with children every child so different and the margins are small which makes it difficult.

But surely you look at your own child and can see if they overweight??

My children are skin and bone. So I try and tam their diet with fat and calories where I can.
If I had the opposite, I’d do the opposite.

Because I have eyes. I can therefore see if my children are overweight!

@Inastatus my child is not overweight but is very aware of weight. There is a child in the class that is sadly overweight and has in the past been bullied for it. In our house we try to make a point of it’s not about what you weigh it’s about being healthy - exercising and having a balanced diet.

If my child was weighed it would play on their mind, I don’t want a already anxious child having the extra worry about their weight. There is no need for them to be weighed.

My children are skin and bone. So I try and tam their diet with fat and calories where I can.
If I had the opposite, I’d do the opposite.

Unless they are markedly medically under weight you will probably find that "skin and bones" is actually the right size. They shod be bony. We often think normal sized children are under weight as so many are chubby. I wouldn't be stuffing rubbish in them unless medically advised.

Because I have eyes. I can therefore see if my children are overweight!

We have become completely desensitised to what is healthy and what isn't, I can only assume the amount of overweight children is down to the fact parents don't see them as big. I sincerely hope that's the case or there are a lot of parents wilfully over feeding their child despite knowing they're doing it. I think many are ignorant to it.

@spanielstail

**Do they take height into consideration too? My son is 94th centile for weight and height, the health visitor said that means he is fine, just tall. I wonder when he gets to school age he will be heavier than average because of his height?

My son is very thin, there is absolutely no weight he could possibly lose!**

Yes because they calculate it with height, weight and age.

However, some overfed children do grow a lot taller so they are on higher weight and height centiles.

That's very interesting, re overfed children growing taller. My friend's child is tall but unfortunately VERY overweight, but she can't see it. She wouldn't let them be weighed in reception, as she said she was conscious of her weight when young and didn't want the child to be the same. She's overweight herself. I worry about her child but I can't say anything as her and the grandma are in denial that there's any problem.

I don't mind but this is because my children are not overweight, they would come out as healthy to skinny. I think if that wasn't going to be the case I'd feel differently.

Maybe other nhs trusts are more inclusive!

It's not run by individual trusts, but by PHE and the equivalent in other home nations. Private schools are not excluded. Though if one declines to let them in, I don't think they can be forced.

The aim is to surveille the population. They added letters to parents/caregivers only in the 1990s.

We were weighed at the start of every term at our all-girls school and during my time there two girls died from anorexia. Many had eating disorders and were very self-conscious about their appearance and weight. Lining everyone up to be weighed did not help. I think it is the responsibility of parents and the GP.

The response from nasty bitchy mother came "oh they weighed them in science last week and my son came home and told me the results."

That's nothing whatsoever to do with the NHS paediatric survey, which is clear the DC shouid be weighed indivudually, sensitively and in private, and results are not shared with the school in any way that identifies individuals.

Hugely damaging

meditrina thank you. I can’t imagine why school would exclude it was a very ordinary primary in all other respects. I’d be interested to know if other children in private schools were weighed yr R and 6.

But surely you look at your own child and can see if they overweight??

My children are skin and bone. So I try and tam their diet with fat and calories where I can.
If I had the opposite, I’d do the opposite.

Because I have eyes. I can therefore see if my children are overweight!

Yes I also have eyes.

My child is in the correct age clothes size, to me she looks 'normal', more or less the same as her pre school class when I pick up/drop off. By sight she looks fine and chances are she is but what is the harm of checking this by weighing/measuring her? If the parents (me) don't have an issue with it why try and argue otherwise? My mum buried her head in the sand with me so I know what it's like and would rather make sure my children are on the right track.

It’s essential for public health planning.

It’s done privately and sensitively (not like e science class example above where all the kids knew everyone else’s weight).

And a lot of parents ARE blind to the problem. Every year there are complaints by parents that their “very sporty and active” child was deemed overweight - failing to accept that those facts are not mutually exclusive. I could happily run 10k races when I was overweight. I was sporty and fat. Now I’m a healthy weight and sporty - and much healthier!

A lot of people are blind. Especially if you are in area with a lot of overweight children your child won’t stand out. I now live in a more affluent area and when I go back to deprived town I notice it whereas when I lived there it was just the norm. Clothes sizes are more generous.
In those newspaper sad face photos they do the child usually looks overweight yet parent has gone to press to say how ridiculous it is they’ve had a letter.
I’m an adult bmi 24 and wear a size 10 or 12 and get comments you don’t need to lose anymore weight yet I’m very near top of healthy bmi. As 2/3 of women my age are overweight or obese it scews peoples perceptions of a healthy weight.

There is a difference though between looking at your child thinking they are the correct 'normal' size and looking at them knowing they are very very, skinny and most certainly will not overweight. I knew my son was underweight last year as a 13 year old as the GP had said so, he was a vegan at the time and now I would say is low but healthy. I think people do know, who are these people kidding themselves. My DD lookong at her is slim and low percentile, not underweight like her brother but usually in trousers a year younger than her age etc so I know my judgement is correct.