To think instead of raising the legal age we should do this instead

[Marriageisspecial]

There is a private member’s bill going through the commons to raise the legal age to get married from 16 to 18. I currently know two school leavers who have just ‘sat’ (different with covid) their GCSEs who are planning on getting married they are both the same age and they live together ect. I know another 16 year old who is starting an apprenticeship in September and will be earning £12,500 per year. I do also understand the concern over coercion and being married off to much older men. However there are also young couples who may want to get married also situations if one has a terminal illness and wants to marry their girlfriend/boyfriend or a teenage pregnancy. So Aibu to think instead we should adopt the system of Texas where you must apply to the court to get married if you are 16-18 this way we could still protect people but make provision for the above cases?

When they applied to court does someone then assess the situation and decide yes or no?

Because I find the idea of people in power making decisions on whether to apply the law or not pretty scary.

I wouldn’t look at any state in the US as a glowing example of how to deal with scenarios like this. Fuck me, it’s case in one state where sex with someone under the age of 18 is unlawful- statutory rape- but if the guy marries the girl (for example) he faces no criminal charges. As Samantha Bee said on the subject “wtf when a burglar gets caught he doesn’t get to marry the house!”

The minimum age should have been raised to 18 long ago.

The example you gave have no reason to marry until 18, saving up will do them good anyway

I don't think minors should be allowed to marry for any reason. Teen pregnancy is not a reason to marry. However I don't think it should be raised to 21. At the end of the day if an 18yo is an adult then they should be allowed to get married.

I've been with oh since I was 15 we still aren't married. We'll get round to it at some point. I don't know anyone who got married at 16 let alone be able to afford it. I mean there's always divorce so I don't really see why people shouldn't.

strong no on the teenage pregnancy as a reason for marriage. I grew up with way too many 'shotgun wedding' families to think that's a good idea

This.

Nah. 16 year olds are children. I'd raise it to 21.

21 is about right.

Agree, 21

There are states in the US where a rapist doesnt' have to vbe prosecuted if he marries the underage victim. Sounds absolutely great.

What is th idea behind marrying a terminally ill sweetheart? I know it is heartbreaking, I lost a friend in 6th form to cancer, but there is no real benefit in a practical sense. I know of people doing it to get life insurance policies or arrange for children born out of wedlock being better off but for two 16 year olds?

One of my nieces married at 19. it was a disaster. My DSis, her mum, married with 21. I am sure there was love in both cases but I also have seen how difficult it is to get a higher education and job prospects or careerr while trying to get a marriage. to work.

It is better to educate girls (and boys) to learn to put themselves first and teach them about life before allowing. them to sign a piece of paper they don't know or understand the repercussion about. it.

The reasons you gave are not valid. None of them. Especially a traumatised teen marrying a dying sweetheart.

I think OP’s username is a clue. I’m guessing hardcore religion is informing her views. None of the moderate religious types I know would back marriage at 16, irrespective of which religion.

" if one has a terminal illness and wants to marry their girlfriend/boyfriend ".

That sounds sweet, but in reality you are making someone who is emotionally immature with little life experience, your next of kin. I've seen Mother's and wider family cut out of funeral arrangements and not know what happened to the ashes, or have any say in the grave. Then within six months the widow/we has fully moved on and it becomes just a distant memory.

I say that as someone who was with my DH from the age of sixteen until I was widowed twenty two years later. Likewise my DD has been with her partner from seventeen, for eighteen years. There isn't mortgages being obtained. They can't rent without guarantors and most LL wouldn't rent to them. So there's no need for a marriage contract to be entered into. It would change the laws around contracts and could open up credit companies arguing that credit should start from sixteen.

I don't think it should be 21 unless we are going to higher the age of combat.

Why 21?

18 is the age of doing grown up stuff for most things surely.

And given loads of people on the thread want to marriage age and consent age to be the same... That's not viable is it!

Thirdly, nowhere in the USA is a good example of how to do things when it comes to this issue. Some States have no minimum age. Some can and do allow 12 year olds to marry after a ‘process’ is satisfied. And, some States think that the answer to an adult male getting a minor pregnant is to marry them. So, no, on balance. Let’s just ban children from getting married. Because in the UK, that is what someone under the age of 18 is. A child.

^^That, 3000 times

Children shouldn’t be allowed to marry under any circumstances OP

I don't agree with 16 but I don't agree with 21 either

I am sure when my parents got married, the legal age was 21 and parental consent was needed before that. The age of majority was 21 and when this reduced to 18, so did the age for marriage. I do agree with the proposed change from 16 to 18 but think going higher than 18, when legally an adult, would not be appropriate.

16 is too young to be married. It’s odd that you can’t have a credit card or a car but people will argue that you should be able to marry. 16 year olds can’t even have a phone contact idk why a marriage contract is okay?

I see no valid reason to get married at such a young age. What possible benefit does a 16 year old gain from being legally tied to someone?

there are also young couples who may want to get married also situations if one has a terminal illness and wants to marry their girlfriend/boyfriend or a teenage pregnancy. So Aibu to think instead we should adopt the system of Texas where you must apply to the court to get married if you are 16-18 this way we could still protect people but make provision for the above cases?

YABU. At 16 you have absolutely no idea of the magnitude of the legal implications of being tied to someone a) through marriage with a child involved and b) handling the death of a spouse.

I'd even argue that at 18 you probably don't understand that fully either but at least then you're legally an adult.

Even if applying through courts, there's no guarantee that this wouldn't be coerced or if the child understands fully what they're committing to.

Frankly I think its shocking and shameful that we STILL allow child marriages in the UK, should have been banned long ago.

Personally I'd also raise the age of consent to 18 as well. With a 'Romeo and Juliet' exception so two teenagers aren't criminalized. How is it legal for a fifty year old man to have sex with a sixteen year old girl (anyone else remember Peter Stringfellow in his hot tub with his sixteen year old 'girlfriend') and yet it's illegal for a fifteen year old to have sex with her sixteen year old boyfriend.

I married at 17.
Been together 41 happy years.
It depends on the individuals.
No I wasn't pregnant.
Had first child at 18 because we wanted to.
Me and my DH have worked all our lives, have never been on benefits.
It worked for us and still does.

In 1980 things were different and nobody seemed surprised that we were getting married.

@potter5

I married at 17. Been together 41 happy years. It depends on the individuals. No I wasn't pregnant. Had first child at 18 because we wanted to. Me and my DH have worked all our lives, have never been on benefits. It worked for us and still does.

In 1980 things were different and nobody seemed surprised that we were getting married.

I think a lot of people would have been surprised.

Presumably you married of your own free will, weren't coerced, weren't married to a much older man who may have been your cousin and hadn't grown up with the idea that you would have little to no choice in the matter.

The proposed bill is to help protect girls in exactly those situations.