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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is my neighbour a cf? what do I say?

171 replies

Pleaseleavemealone · 15/06/2021 11:38

morning,
have slightly changed so as not to out..
yesterday I knocked into my neighbours car and slightly cosmetically damaged it. Was not on the body work but on a plastic part that can be taken off and easily put back on. Of course I immediately offered to replace this part, and neighbour says yes we'll look on the internet for a part. So ive looked on the internet and found a new part, about to order only to get a message from neighbour saying "this is the quote we've got, its X amount, hope that's ok we'll let you know when its finished".
They had already booked it in to be fixed in the garage at that point without saying anything to me, as I was under the impression that we were just going to get a part from the internet. Believe me when I say this is the easiest fix, a child could do it. Its literally screwing a bit of plastic on. Thing is, the garage they have gone to has charged extortionate prices (think 3.5x what I estimated), inflated money for the part and obviously charged for labour, which I'm not happy about as it's literally a ten minute easy job that can absolutely be done by yourself.
I don't even have this kind of money, it would have even been a stretch for me to pay the price I thought it would be.
I know it's ultimately their decision on how they get their car fixed, but I really feel my neighbour didn't have to take it to a top of the range garage and is being ridiculous expecting me to hand over that money without discussion.

OP posts:
AlCalavicci · 15/06/2021 12:35

While I get that the extra cost is not what you want , I agree with PP , I also wouldn't want a it fixed by someone that doesn't know what they are doing even if it does seem like a easy job.
The part you have sourced may not be genuine , the colour / finish may not be a perfect match and lot of cars body work parts have plastic clips to hold them in places as well as screws they are really easy to snap and a swine to replace.

If I were you I would go to reputable garage, pref one that is dealership recognised with very clear photos and make / model of car and ask if they can give you a rough quote , if there is a big difference speak to your neighbour and very politely ask if they wouldn't mind using a different garage , but if they say no they want to stick with the one they have chosen then you must accept that .

DamnitFanny · 15/06/2021 12:35

Even a very small knock can cause damage under panels which then ‘pop out’ and look unmarked. I would always insist the car is checked over by a reputable garage for this reason. Someone drove into the back of my car and insisted their ‘mate’ could fix it - ended up going through the insurance and they found more damage than initially thought. You hit their car - you’re the cf in this one!

godmum56 · 15/06/2021 12:39

I know who the CF is and its not your neighbour!

TakingTheLowRoad · 15/06/2021 12:39

You damaged their car. They’re perfectly entitled to get it repaired where they want and by a qualified person. That’s what I did when someone “bumped” my relatively new and pristine car by not looking properly when they pulled out of a junction. Not my problem they damaged the alloy, mud flap and wheel surround. I had the right to have the car put back the way it was before they hit me and by the garage of my choice, which happened to be the dealership.

JustMeAndWheatley · 15/06/2021 12:43

I’m with your neighbour on this one!

Forgottenyeti · 15/06/2021 12:45

Is this a reverse?

Hsurbbrb · 15/06/2021 12:45
Biscuit
MikeWozniaksGloriousTache · 15/06/2021 12:46

You’re the CF imo. You crashed into their car and then complaining about the cost of them getting a professional to fix it. I wouldn’t want some random irresponsible neighbour fixing anything when they caused the damage. If you can’t afford it then you need to go through your insurance.

LittleDidSheKnow · 15/06/2021 12:50

Sorry, neighbours are not CF.

FunMcCool · 15/06/2021 12:52

Ask them for another quote but you’re the one in the wrong here.

Lalliella · 15/06/2021 12:53

Have they already had the car fixed? They shouldn’t have done this without agreeing with you. They should’ve told you the cost then given you the option to go through insurance. The insurance company will have approved garages that they use. Your neighbours can’t just take it anywhere. If they’ve already had it done then they are CFs.

dottiedodah · 15/06/2021 12:54

Quite often what we see as "cosmetic damage" can be more difficult to repair than what is seen at first glance .I would go through your insurance if you can. They are not being unreasonable to want it repaired properly .

RaspberryCoulis · 15/06/2021 12:55

Is this one of these threads where the OP gets an overwhelming response that she is the one who is unreasonable, then comes back and announces that actually she's done a "clever" reverse and that in fact she is the person who was crashed into?

Hope not, because people who post reverses are fuckwits.

Hawkins001 · 15/06/2021 12:55

It tis a pickle

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 15/06/2021 12:57

You need to tell them you can't afford it so it's either sourced from online or go through insurance.

Jaxhog · 15/06/2021 12:58

@summersolstice43

I think if someone damaged my car, no matter what they damaged and how easy it was to replace, I'd want it done at a reputable garage. You're lucky they didnt insist on going through your insurance to be honest.
This.
SeasonFinale · 15/06/2021 12:58

It's not them it's you!

bunburyscucumbersandwich · 15/06/2021 13:00

You are the CF! You've damaged their car, and to say yourself hassle and money you've offered to pay instead of claiming on your insurance.
They have the right to have it repaired to what they want and who they want it done by.
Next time, drive more carefully and don't hit their car!

VoiceOfCommonSense · 15/06/2021 13:03

No.. you are the CF. It will teach you to take care whilst driving..

MadeForThis · 15/06/2021 13:03

Reverse

whynotwhatknot · 15/06/2021 13:09

Ask deifitely to see the quote just incase theyre adding on other things but they do have the right to go to a garage not want it fixed by you

BungleandGeorge · 15/06/2021 13:15

If it’s a cheap plastic part I presume that the difference in cost between the bodge job and a professional garage is not an enormous sum? They should have checked whether you wanted to proceed or go through insurance before they took it to the garage for work but I expect they didn’t due to the inconvenience. They’re doing you a favour by not going through the insurance. That would be easier for them and they’d most likely be able to get a guarantee courtesy car etc. If you requested not to then you need to pay

chunkymonkey101 · 15/06/2021 13:20

Sorry but YABU. We had similar and thought that it was superficial, the person who hit us wanted to fix it themselves. We went to 3 different garages to get a few quotes and there was a fair amount of unseen damage so ended up going through insurance

PinkCast · 15/06/2021 13:20

I know you say it's an easy fix, but I'm completely useless at anything like that so would always go to a garage to get it repaired. If you damaged my car I wouldn't be happy with you doing the repair, I'd want it done professionally. You damaged their car, you or your insurance pays.

GoldenBlue · 15/06/2021 13:23

I would want the work done by a professional garage and would either go via insurance or expect you to pay for the cost of a garage repair.

You damaged their car

You don't get to set the rules about the repair