AIBU that neighbour is a cheeky F !

[Karmabites2591]

Named changed because completely outing If she is on here.

So we live in a terraced house with decent size gardens.
Our garden has a pool, climbing frame and tree house thing for kids.
We have fences but they are lower enough to look over etc.
We have been out every day the last week.
My kids have noticed that things haven’t been where they left them in the garden but I just assumed they just forgot etc

Anyway, I got home from work early today and the kids were still at the park and one with my sister.
When I arrived home.
The neighbours child was in our garden using the climbing frame whilst his mum was in her garden watching.

Seriously ??? Neighbour was apologetic when she realised I was annoyed but said she didn’t really see the problem as he was supervised and wasn’t doing any harm ?

[stayathomer]

The parents involved thought I was mad for being annoyed about it.
It's only since I've gotten older that I've realised that some people have totally different thought processes. I new people that were climbing over fences to get into school yards with their dogs to play at weekends and not see anything wrong with it. I kept saying 'but what if everyone did it?' and they said 'it's a public place, our taxes pay for it'

[stayathomer]

Knew even!

[StrongTea]

Wouldn’t remove your kid’s toys. Why should they do without stuff because of your rude neighbour?

[Maggiesfarm]

I can hardly believe the cheek of anyone allowing their child to go next door to play with stuff in the garden. I mean, you just wouldn't. Well some people obviously would, your neighbours unfortunately.

[Nanny0gg]

@Singlenotsingle

Did the child do any damage? No
Poor child, looking sadly over the fence while your children play.
Yes, the woman should have asked but it's not the worst crime in the world.

Until something happens...

Do you make a habit of using other peoples' things without asking?

[LittleOwl153]

Seems a shame your kids are loosing their play equipment because someone else thinks they are entitled to it if you don't yet have a planned move date - especially given the current weather!

[Warmduscher]

It’s not the OP’s job to provide play opportunities and stimulation for someone else’s child, unless she is advertising her services as a play leader or childminder.

[EineReiseDurchDieZeit]

Not just using peoples things but allowing your child into someones empty home without asking! Give over with your bleeding heart poor child shite.

[PinkG0ld]

Don’t remove the play equipment! Your DC will think they’re being punished because of the little shits next door. Install CCTV and do something to the fences. Maybe a spiky plant running along the top and all the way down like a trellis?

[MsHedgehog]

@LookItsMeAgain Have you found that thread?! I really want to read it!

[mygee]

How rude! Time for new, taller fences? Or some trellis on the top of the existing fence? Proper cheek!

[contrary13]

"Also, it's not the OP's role to provide outdoor play facilities for another person's child; if the "poor child (is) looking sadly over the fence" maybe its CF parents can take the hint and fork out for their own toys instead of waiting for OP and her family to leave their home and sneaking their kid over the fence."

My parents neighbours used to help themselves to my daughter's toddler-sized plastic garden slide all the time, apparently. When we weren't at my parents, the slide was stored behind their woodshed, and the husband just used to lean over and grab hold of it, lifting it over the fence so that their toddler could play on it. Until the day I was the one who watched him do so. I may have risked my own life and limb to stick my head over the fence and demand to know what the hell they thought they were doing - and to return the slide which I'd bought, for my child's use, immediately. They rather shamefacedly did so, and then allowed their toddler to scream, despite a vast array of garden toys already littering their space, for a while in temper that "her" slide had been taken away by "the nasty lady next door".

What they didn't take into consideration is that, unlike some people, I don't believe in giving small children everything they demand, when they demand it. So I cheerfully sat out in the garden with a book and ignored the noise. It stopped eventually. And the slide (which the parents had obviously seen my child using from a window overlooking my parents garden, and felt entitled to its use for their child) was moved firmly out of their reach. Within a few days, my mother very pointedly moved everything else out of reach of that fence between the gardens. Just in case.

The wife, it later turned out, was lovely. But the husband was an arrogant bully who floundered when stood up to (which I did a few times, because he didn't frighten me - I'd lived through worse than he could dish out to me). Sadly, their children followed in their father's footsteps.

Things like this go on more often than we realise, though, I think. When we had our own garden, I insisted on a shed large enough to keep everything under lock-and-key - especially as my parents fence is 8' and ours is half that size between us and our neighbours (who had small children and grandchildren living there/visiting every weekend during the summer! They're teens now, so unlikely to want to borrow a toddler sized slide, or paddling pool - which is my dog's, as it happens...).

[SchadenfreudePersonified]

However they have clearly been waiting for us to all be out !

And this tell you that inspire of her saying "she didn’t really see the problem" , that she knows fine well there is a problem.

I'd raise the height of the fence with trellis and grow something spikey up it.

[Hollywolly1]

It would make you wonder how long has this been going on for, they probably hooked up to your ESB as well. This reminds me of a thread on here a while back where a woman had her neighbour in the next flat using her tumble dryer as they had a shared utility type of arrangement.
You say they have a pretty garden and nice furniture so basically it's just pure stinginess that they won't buy swings or toys etc for their own kid but will happily wreck yours and apart from that how about covid and touching everything.

[BlueLobelia]

CF indeed.

We had a neighbour who used to wait for us to leave for work then let her jack russell into our garden to shit on the lawn.

Pity for her I was working from home one day.

[FricasseeTurnips]

[quote MsHedgehog]@LookItsMeAgain Have you found that thread?! I really want to read it![/quote]
I've been advanced searching but I can't find it. Perhaps it was in Chat.

[DishingOutDone]

There are always people who will defend this behaviour though as we've seen - I remember a thread about a pool being used whilst someone was out, the neighbours popped round with towels etc., and a significant number of posters came on and defended the CF neighbours - similar sort of thing; you're not using it so why shouldn't they help themselves, not fair if they don't have a pool etc.

OP ask if you can have a go on her husband's cock, you won't be doing any harm and she can watch (supervision aspect).

[HollowTalk]

@Karmabites2591

That’s the thing as well my children well 2 of them the other one is a baby. But my eldest 2 are much older than the boy.
They must be helping him climb over. Climbing over and passing him over etc
The pool
Is safe thankfully.

So your children are helping him climb over? That doesn't make sense.

[Lilibet2022]

Absolute CFers OP. Some fast growing prickly climbing bushes/plants along the fence should help. I told my CFer neighbours DCs to keep out of the gardens nicely and she's running a whole hate campaign against me now. Like yours OP ours is a mess I'm trying to sort out gradually and I just didn't want them hurt. careful with the cameras if she's anything like my CF NDN she'll complain about that too.

[Lilibet2022]

Hollywolly1 same here. We have swings and toys etc for the DCs to play with. They have flowers a hot tub and a Wendy house they've all outgrown...

[stackemhigh]

@LookItsMeAgain

I remember that thread... the poster had a long garden and they had garden toys (swing, slide etc) put into it but they could also lock their garden. The neighbours were using this (unbeknownst to the poster) and when they got locked in to the garden they were apoplectic with rage, even though they were in someone else's garden using their garden equipment!


Also, if I remember correctly the CFs said something like it wasn't fair that the OP had her own 'playground' and that she was legally obliged to let CF's kids use it, or something along those lines? The sense of entitlement was staggering.

[osbertthesyrianhamster]

I'd still get a camera.

[lydia93]

I don't understand all the pussy footing around.

Don't remove your play equipment and ruin your children's playtime.

Simply every single time you see anything, call her out on it.

Put something in the garden so when it's moved you can straight away go round and call her out.

The cctv is the best option as you have proof and call her out every single time.
People like this sometimes need to be called out ALOT.

It happened in my garden and not even when I'm out! So every time I would go out and tell them to go back to their own garden.

[TheLovelinessOfDemons]

I'm pretty sure that's trespassing.

[Karmabites2591]

I meant the parents must be helping him climb over not my kids.
Mine are 8 and 14. What I mean is the equipment in the garden are for their age group.
There ds is 4/5