Deleted threads

[HeyGirlHeyBoy]

Oh ffs, another thread where op, apparently 40+ posts in, realises information could be identifying so a thread posters have bothered to reply to is gone. Always seems to be when the resounding response is YABU. Funny that I'm sure I'm not the only one put off responding by this happening so often.

others that are likely trolls that I seem to get sucked into.

That's the point of a troll.

I'm no expert on identifying them, but if something seems a bit too well placed to push all the classic MN buttons, it's worth a second thought...

@HeyGirlHeyBoy

Lol morealonetime! It's not so much a zombie thread as an ongoing annoyance thread!

I'm not talking at all about genuine concerns wrt identifying people, tho I do think we all have to be aware we're on a public forum when we post. I'm talking about the flouncers who don't like the unanimous replies of yabu and those others that are likely trolls that I seem to get sucked into.

But how could you know which is which?

If they don't give identifying information!

@HeyGirlHeyBoy

If they don't give identifying information!

But you don't know what information could identify them to someone they know, especially if they're talking about a specific incident.

Especially if they have multiple other threads in the same username

Maybe don't post a specific identifying Incident? But Im talking about specific incident in OP, 99% of posters say yabu and the next thing there's a deletion, impression given is it was the yabus that caused the 'concern'. Anyway it annoys me and stops me bothering to respond overall. It doesn't bother you, no problem.

@ludocris

Are you talking about the house moving one?

It's not really surprising that the number of deleted threads is increasing given how common it is now for active threads to be shared in articles by trashy newspapers. It's one thing to share your stories/experiences/thoughts on a forum designed for parents. It's quite another to have to that information shared in newspapers and on social media sites. Whilst any information shared may not appear 'outing' to you, if there is a specific incident recounted or a conversation repeated, anyone else involved in said incident or conversation who happens to see the article could easily work out who it was. The more it's shared on social media, the more those chances increase. I've seen a couple of threads picked up in this way recently where the OP was complaining about their in-laws. Can you imagine the potential fallout?

There’s no way that I would ever start a thread on MN dealing with a crisis or personal matters. It’s so unpredictable which one some lazy, scummy hack will pick up on.

@HeyGirlHeyBoy

Maybe don't post a specific identifying Incident? But Im talking about specific incident in OP, 99% of posters say yabu and the next thing there's a deletion, impression given is it was the yabus that caused the 'concern'. Anyway it annoys me and stops me bothering to respond overall. It doesn't bother you, no problem.

But the ones where there is a huge pile-on in AIBU are precisely the ones the hacks often pick up!

‘Pile-on’ all too often means a lot of people agree and the OP doesn’t like it.

@opalescent

Why does it bother you all? Genuine question? Why is it an issue if someone gets their thread pulled? There's plenty more to read

I can’t believe you’re genuinely confused.

@ludocris

Especially if they have multiple other threads in the same username

Then maybe they should think about it in advance.

@HeyGirlHeyBoy

I know mnhq probably can't, but if would be great if they could take a look and reply 'Well no, nothing v identifying there, the situation maybe but you as the poster, no. Thread stands

I’d love to know how people get their threads zapped because that’s exactly what they said to me.

I posted a rant when I was really upset about a situation that had happened to my DD at her SEN school. Name change failed and someone advanced searched me, cross referenced threads and both commented on the thread in a way that made it clear they knew me and text me.

I asked for the thread to be deleted and MN said no. I emailed them the text I had from the person who’d upset me and had been pointed in the direction of the thread.

They still refused to delete unless I posted on the thread and told people who’d “taken the time to reply why I wanted it deleted.”

It was a full nine hours before it went and it did cause bother for me. I’ll never post about anything important on here again.

Yet some folks get threads pulled just because they don’t like being told their BU!!!

Then maybe they should think about it in advance.

@WomanStanleyWoman is this primarily a forum for parents to support each other, or a site set up for your entertainment?

@WomanStanleyWoman

‘Pile-on’ all too often means a lot of people agree and the OP doesn’t like it.

Doesn't make a difference. They're still the threads more likely to be used as clickbait by desperate hacks.

@ludocris

Then maybe they should think about it in advance.

@WomanStanleyWoman is this primarily a forum for parents to support each other, or a site set up for your entertainment?

Absolutely it’s a site for support. I’m just interested in how many people suddenly panic that their thread is ‘identifying’ when they don’t get quite the support they were expecting.

Absolutely it’s a site for support. I’m just interested in how many people suddenly panic that their thread is ‘identifying’ when they don’t get quite the support they were expecting.

Bit of a circular argument really. I'd say that those are the threads most likely to be reported by the trashy tabloids. You think it's largely down to the number of people disagreeing with them.

I just don't see why anyone would really care about a load of random strangers online dissing them, as long as it's just on the one site. They can always change username and no one would be any the wiser. However, I would care about my story being splashed across social media.

But that’s the risk they take, isn’t it? It’s not like the tabloids scraping MN for content. ‘But I never thought it would happen to me’ really isn’t an excuse.

@WomanStanleyWoman

But that’s the risk they take, isn’t it? It’s not like the tabloids scraping MN for content. ‘But I never thought it would happen to me’ really isn’t an excuse.

I simply don't see why you think your entertainment is more important than someone else's sense of privacy.

I simply don’t see what you don’t get. We’ll obviously have to agree to disagree.

@WomanStanleyWoman

But that’s the risk they take, isn’t it? It’s not like the tabloids scraping MN for content. ‘But I never thought it would happen to me’ really isn’t an excuse.

Who cares. Literally, who cares. This is primarily a parenting support site. It's a place where people come with all kinds of situations, ideas and questions, and seek to connect with others. If that person then worries or regrets the thread, why on earth should it matter if they need to have it removed?

As a pp said, often the OP doesn't intend to identify them self at the outset, but over the course of the thread they are pushed to reveal more and more information.

Your attitude of casual meanness is so common on MN these days. I've really started to think twice about whether I want to be here any more.

Sick of hearing about posters who 'can't handle the truth', 'don't like the responses' or 'get their arse handed to them'. It can be a real bitch-fest at times.

@WomanStanleyWoman

But that’s the risk they take, isn’t it? It’s not like the tabloids scraping MN for content. ‘But I never thought it would happen to me’ really isn’t an excuse.

Case in point. So bloody self righteous

I agree with opalescent

Case in point. So bloody self righteous

ME self-righteous?! Have you listened to yourself?

Maybe you should practice what you preach re: ‘casual meanness’.

Why should anyone need an 'excuse' to have their thread deleted? The whole idea is ridiculous! There is no genuine, supportive, well-intentioned reason to think that people in distress or needing advice/support shouldn't have the right to have their thread deleted if they change their mind about posting for whatever reason.

Like I said, we’ll have to agree to disagree. If you’re determined to be a dog with a bone about it, you’re only wasting your own time.