Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I should be allowed to flex my working hours for school hols?

136 replies

Lucy788 · 11/06/2021 21:11

To give context:
Ds started reception in September. There was no wraparound on and as I have been WFH my boss agreed I could start work half an hour later at 9am to drop him off. I do this 4 x days a week and make up the 2hrs 1 evening.
This has worked well throughout - he has said so himself and let me continue to do this 2 days a week when breakfast club opened in Nov.
As of start of August this year our company are due to move back to original working eg. Working from the office and regular working patterns.
This obviously coincides with Summer holidays. Today I discussed with my boss that for the first 3wks in Aug I'd like to continue exactly as I am as the holiday club he will attend opens at 8.30 and he will be going 2 x days a week. So I will need to make up an extra hour a week.
He basically told me that unfortunately flexi time will have ended by then and therefore I can't!
I am kind of in disbelief. I'm more than happy as of Sept when back to school to return to normal working pattern, but I've done this since September and it has caused absolutely no issues whatsoever.
I explained to him that my alternative is to take unpaid leave 2 x days a week for 3 weeks as I will have no childcare and he basically sent me away and said he will think about it and let me know next Thursday if im allowed.
Aibu to be pissed off about this!?

It's a computer based roll and I work alone, eg. Me not being there at 8.30am doesn't impact anybody and I've demonstrated that for months.

OP posts:
coronafiona · 11/06/2021 22:32

Have a look on sitters.com and find a nanny for a few weeks? I sympathise as am in a similar position. I wish employers would learn about flexibility from covid. Sad

TableFlowerss · 11/06/2021 23:07

@Nordicwannabe

But that's totally different, Tableflowerss. Of course if it's shifts or the company needs cover, and the flexibility would negatively impact colleagues, then the boss is entirely right to refuse.

But OP has said she works alone on a computer, and there is no impact on her job. She shows flexibility on her side, and works extra hours. To refuse her a half-hour flexibility for a few weeks which won't have any downside but will make her it possible for her to actually work, is bloody obtuse.

I agree with you, in OP’s case it’s totally fair enough and it’s only temporary.

My example was someone utterly taking the piss with their expectations and the boss righty refusing.

OP’s is nothing like that at all.

jelly79 · 11/06/2021 23:12

Fill in a flexible working request formally. Your reason is you have proved it can work rather than your sons wrap around care

They will need to evidence the business reason for declining.

Of course other colleagues can do the same

CornforthWhiteH · 11/06/2021 23:13

I don't understand bosses who are so inflexible.

However. I don't believe when we choose to have children it means that our work needs to accommodate our childcare issues. One of the reasons I actually left my job was because it was basically impossible to do with with children. That's my issue, not my bosses.

We do seem to have turned into a nation where we all believe that work should accommodate our lifestyle choices. I would just take the unpaid option - or get a new job, maybe work for yourself where you can do exactly what you need to do re childcare school drop off etc.

But I do reiterate that it does seem daft he's suddenly not so accommodating after being so helpful. Possibly more behind the scenes going on I would imagine.

MaMelon · 11/06/2021 23:15

Yep, that’s a ridiculous management decision right there. Why some managers behave in this way is beyond me. If you were in my department, your role allowed for it, and you’d worked flexibly and productively over the last year on this pattern I would extend it by three weeks without a second thought. Hopefully once they’ve reflected on it they’ll realise it is a perfectly reasonable request and grant it.

Forgothowmuchlhatehomeschoolin · 11/06/2021 23:20

Hate jobsworth bosses.
Hope he doesn't want any favours off you OP.
Ffs they go on about getting mums back into work but with shit like this it is hard to get a job.

randomsabreuse · 11/06/2021 23:24

As children get older there are far more childcare options, most offer early drop off in normal times but aren't yet!

Myotherusernamewastakenagain · 11/06/2021 23:24

Your boss is a poor manager and very short sighted. When I managed a team I made sure that flexibility was a given both ways - if they ask me to start late or finish early I always said yes without question and on the odd occasion I wanted them to work early or late I'd never get any aggro from them.

Ofpalestsilver · 11/06/2021 23:25

I really don’t understand why people still insist of being so inflexible. I’m incredible fortunate to work somewhere we have so much flexibility and it’s just increased more during the pandemic. There is such a high level of trust. And that trust is repaid. It’s super sad to see companies not trust their employees

Blowingagale · 11/06/2021 23:36

Maybe the next level of management are now giving less leeway. Your manager has agreed changes in the past and has not said flat out no.

I can also imagine he/company may be getting a range of requests and need to be fair to everyone including people with children or other caring responsibilities but also people with illnesses. also needs of all the staff and perceived/actual fairness. Company wide policy/approval process will cover you even if you don’t work in as team.

Rubyrecka · 11/06/2021 23:45

Why can't you just abide by the company policy and the contract of employment you have agreed. I get it doesn't suit your life and or plans but guess what it's your contract so unless you can talk HR around like it or lump it.

Dddccc · 12/06/2021 00:06

Sorry but your employer has been more then flexible for a year I think you should suck it up and find you own solution

Lovethewater · 12/06/2021 00:21

It is really disappointing that your manage has not agreed your request for flexibility of an hour for 3 weeks. However it may be that he is trying to deal with reluctance from colleagues to return to the office and a number of different requests for flexible working, covering leave etc., so potentially a number of things in the mix and a need to be seen as fair. He has said he'll think about it rather than an absolute no, so fingers crossed for you.

AudacityBaby · 12/06/2021 00:26

Bit surprised at how divisive this is - it seems a reasonable request to me and as a childless worker I wouldn’t be bothered by it.

(I’ve a thread running at the moment about issues at work I am bothered by and that turned into a bunfight. Classic MN. Grin)

Anyway, YANBU.

Namenic · 12/06/2021 00:38

I would leave a company that didn’t make these allowances IF my role did not require it (eg customer facing). I have worked overtime unpaid due to unexpected work incidents - because I know it is a give-and-take and my company treats me well. So the company benefits too. A high degree of trust is part of the company outlook and I think it benefits everyone on the whole.

Dahlia444 · 12/06/2021 00:43

@Lovethewater

It is really disappointing that your manage has not agreed your request for flexibility of an hour for 3 weeks. However it may be that he is trying to deal with reluctance from colleagues to return to the office and a number of different requests for flexible working, covering leave etc., so potentially a number of things in the mix and a need to be seen as fair. He has said he'll think about it rather than an absolute no, so fingers crossed for you.
I agree with this. For a year and more now as management we've been dealing with many many individually reasonable requests for all manner of issues e.g. wraparound care, home schooling, safe transport, shielding, living with shielder, lack of usual grandparent care... it goes on and on. It's so hard now to see what's fair and what's not, and who minds and who doesn't. If he's anything like me he was looking forward to the time when the requests would ease off and people would just stop asking 'can I just...'. I sympathise with both sides but do hope he will agree for you.
theloraxspeaks · 12/06/2021 03:17

YANBU, it's half an hour, 2 days/week for 3 weeks. It's ludicrous if they won't accommodate under these circumstances especially since it isn't like a job in health care or teaching where someone else would have to cover.
I hope your manager comes to his senses!

Rmka · 12/06/2021 04:24

I'm quite shocked by this. It sounds like your boss doesn't allow this on principle, but what exactly is that principle and does it actually matter? In all companies I've worked for flexibility up to 1 hour was a given and we only had to inform our line manager, not even ask for permission.

Only exception were roles that required being in the office at specific times, e.g. call centre. But, as those roles have shifts, people have some flexibility with rota.

30 minutes is nothing. There are usually no meetings that early, a lot of people are chatting in the kitchen, making coffee, and then it's almost gone.

Rmka · 12/06/2021 04:27

@Ofpalestsilver

I really don’t understand why people still insist of being so inflexible. I’m incredible fortunate to work somewhere we have so much flexibility and it’s just increased more during the pandemic. There is such a high level of trust. And that trust is repaid. It’s super sad to see companies not trust their employees
This.
Rmka · 12/06/2021 04:35

@CornforthWhiteH

I don't understand bosses who are so inflexible.

However. I don't believe when we choose to have children it means that our work needs to accommodate our childcare issues. One of the reasons I actually left my job was because it was basically impossible to do with with children. That's my issue, not my bosses.

We do seem to have turned into a nation where we all believe that work should accommodate our lifestyle choices. I would just take the unpaid option - or get a new job, maybe work for yourself where you can do exactly what you need to do re childcare school drop off etc.

But I do reiterate that it does seem daft he's suddenly not so accommodating after being so helpful. Possibly more behind the scenes going on I would imagine.

But don't you think that's part of a bigger problem? Roles that are impossible to do with children is one of the reasons why there's such a big wage gap between men an women. And a lot of the time inflexibility of the employer makes no sense. There are so many roles that can be done equally well at different hours. If that means the employee is happy, it only benefits the employer. Happy employee is loyal, more motivated, more flexible...
supersuds · 12/06/2021 05:09

It's actually incredibly difficult for your boss to turn your request down legally, unless there is a very clear reason why the work cannot be made up in the evenings (for example if you, say, worked in a shop and the first half hour of the day was critical to setting up for the day).

Specifically, you have the right to request flexible working and your boss can Only turn it down for limited business reasons. If he turns the request down for spurious reasons, then it's likely to amount to indirect sex discrimination. Have a look at your company's flexible working policy and the ACAS guidance on this.

MoppaSprings · 12/06/2021 05:18

It does seem very ridgid for the sake of half an hour but perhaps your boss is preempting complaints from other staff members.

What do you plan to do for holiday cover going forward. If you have used up all your holidays how do you plan to accommodate half term and Christmas holidays?

Your boss is maybe thinking ahead.

InnaBun · 12/06/2021 07:26

Yeah it does seem silly you might end up taking half a day's leave but it happens a lot in my workplace. It's just too big and clunky for everyone to be able to have flexibility outside what the system can cope with.

What would happen if you just turned up late those days?

copperpotsalot · 12/06/2021 07:42

I've never been brave enough but I have worked with people who have just announced that they will do this and I think it's a really good way to do it.

Interestingly both were from outside of UK, European.

Comtesse · 12/06/2021 07:44

Yanbu OP, not in the slightest - completely annoying of your boss, so short sighted of them.