Who is BU?

[hdha]

2 people, person A and person B.

Person A is a SAHM. A receives money from parents £200 a month. This goes towards birthdays, wedding, fathers/mothers day, clothes, items for baby. This money is rarely spent on A unless needed.

Person B says that A should give the £200 to B as it's 'fun money'. B says that normal SAHMs put any money they get into family money for it to be shared. A agrees with this, however, A has no access to B's money therefore this means that A would have to ask for money if anything is needed. A wouldn't be comfortable doing this.

Who is BU?

B is actually the devil with a stick on moustache

Joint account and share all money.

A needs to stop being a SAHP and protect themselves. This is terrible. All money should go into one account and both A and B need equal access to all of it.

B should be giving A money not A’s parents

Joint account

Bloody hell. NO way would I live like that. Person B sounds controlling as hell.

A should tell B to go screw his self.

A should get a job so she isn't financially dependent on B and then leave.

Woah, assuming A is the mother and B the father why is her name not on the CB, she's losing out on her pension stamps!!

Person B gets CB. Person B also took the maternity grant. A's and B's relationship is happy besides this.

Happy???

Good lord, Person A has Stockholm syndrome. And is being abused by Person B.

A’s parents are clearly trying to give A the means of escape!

There are so many things wrong here that it's hard to know where to start.

Person B is abusive. Person A cannot see that because victims of abuse can rarely see it as that is how abusers work.

Person A needs to get out asap

This must be a shock OP but I suspect that your parents gave you the money for bills because they though my you couldn’t afford things saw the fact B had a new Mac book and were surprised

Your relationship is incredibly abusive or if A if your daughter she is and good luck

You’re being financially abused, OP.

Tell him you need equal access to all money or you’re leaving. And mean it.

A should put the money in the joint account usually.

However A and B should have the same amount of pocket money each month to buy whatever they want and childrens clothes etc should come from the joint account with a general agreed monthly budget on that (would of course need to be flexible).

B is financially abusive. A needs to get herself a job. Both B and A's parents are treating A like a child. A is behaving like a child in being told what to do and taking money from parents.

If A and B get CB and maternity grant is B that high an earner or do they not live together and A is claiming independently?

B should be sharing his money with A

Interesting that B thinks A’s money is “family” money but B’s money is not.

A needs to find a job and leave B

I don't understand why As parents are giving A and B money when they have enough for mac books and tvs. A and B should be more open about money and have a joint account. A needs to grow up and ask for joint access to money or go get a job. And B needs to let go of controlling all the money.

Why the fuck is B getting the cb and the parents money being used for baby things. So many things wrong here.

@hdha

Person B gets CB. Person B also took the maternity grant. A's and B's relationship is happy besides this. But B makes A feel inferior at times.

So you are person a, and your partner is shafting you?

Why are you carrying on with the A and B talk? Say who it is - it sounds like a GCSE maths leadup otherwise

I hope A and B are married otherwise A has a lot more to worry about than £200.

I would use the opportunity to open up a discussion about 'family money'.

B is clearly of the opinion that all money coming in should be shared... so lets start by assuming all income is joint . Clearly there'll be spare 'fun money' after the bills are paid. I'm glad that B feels that should be 'family money', so it should be split equally between both A and B. Will you both have individual accounts for that? B will need to set up a standing order at the start of the month.

...and how did CB end up in B's name when A is a SAHM? That's clearly an 'oversight' which needs addressing.

Both A and Bs money should be shared - b is now backtracking as they realise they are much better off. If b doesn't share they are financially abusive

B is unreasonable not to allow access A to family money.
A is unreasonable to accept money from her parents rather than standing on her own two feet.

I hope that A is married to B so has at least some level of financial protection in the case of a split.