Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wedding suit drama - AIBU?

58 replies

Hopelesshostel3 · 04/06/2021 14:33

My best friend has turned into a complete bridezilla - so much so that the friendship will never quite recover after the wedding. As my opinion is pretty cloudy as it is just wanted to see who’s being unreasonable:

In MOH and my partner is buying a new suit as he’s gained weight over lockdown/wants to look nice on the day. He was looking in a shop recently and sent over a picture of a suit he liked. As I was with my friend I showed her it (I thought it was really nice). She’s said he can’t wear it as it’s a similar colour to what the grooms party is wearing. She also said he can’t wear a tie that’s the same colour as my dress as that’s also what the grooms party will be wearing.

Here’s my AIBU it’s a different style of suit, while it’s the same colour it’s different material/pattern and it’s a pretty standard suit colour. My partner is feeling pretty insecure he’s gained weight and it’s the first one he’s liked the look of. As he said, it’s an expensive outlay and he’ll be wearing it for other weddings/events to come.

OP posts:
BorisKilledMyHusband · 04/06/2021 14:34

She is BU. But to keep the peace keep the suit and change the tie. Job done.

AryaStarkWolf · 04/06/2021 14:35

Yeah she's BU, not sure how you would handle it though, sounds like she'll be pissed off with you if he gets it

Cinnamon12345 · 04/06/2021 14:36

Good idea boris

thefirstmrsrochester · 04/06/2021 14:37

She is BU. Get the suit, compromise on the tie.

thecatsthecats · 04/06/2021 14:38

Unreasonable about the suit, reasonable enough about the tie.

My husband always takes a second tie to weddings just in case he matches the wedding party.

fallfallfall · 04/06/2021 14:44

You need a real discerning eye to tell the difference in men’s suits anyway.
Get the suit, really it’s non of her business what guests wear.

katy1213 · 04/06/2021 14:46

When did weddings get so tacky? And what happens if another guest inadvertently wears a tie the same colour as the groom? Will the marriage be invalidated? Will Bridezilla be carried down the aisle in a swoon? Barred from the photos, obviously.

trevthecat · 04/06/2021 14:47

If you hadn't shown her, you wouldn't of known. She is BU unless she is letting every guest know what they can't wear! (Although I'd say she was BU to tell guests too 🤣🤣)

DramaAlpaca · 04/06/2021 14:48

She is being a bit of a bridezilla isn't she?

I say he should buy the suit as he likes it and it makes him feel good, but compromise on the colour of the tie.

Holly60 · 04/06/2021 14:51

If she asks why he bought the suit just say you completely forgot to mention to him but that you made him go back out and choose a new tie, because you knew that was important to her Grin

CrazyCatsAndKittens · 04/06/2021 14:53

Are we allowed to ask what color the suit is?

If it's a fairly neutral color like grey or black, it's not a problem.

If it's a more unusual color like periwinkle or fuchsia, maybe she has a point.

But, I agree with keep the suit but change the tie.

Lorw · 04/06/2021 14:59

Yeah change the tie 😁 if he has a different colour tie on and no flower thingy nobody will think he’s one of the groomsmen even if he’s in the same colour suit.

My exh’ best mans GF sent over a picture of a dress that was the same colour and style as my bridesmaid dresses, and asked if she could wear it as she wanted to match him and obviously he already had the tie that matched the bridesmaid dresses so she knew colour schemes, I said no as she isn’t part of the bridal party, I don’t think I was that bridezilla tbf 😂

Inertia · 04/06/2021 15:01

She'll never notice what suit he's wearing on the day. Just never mention it again and let him buy the suit he wants.

Changing the tie should do the trick.

He won't want to look like he's with the groom's party anyway, he'll get given jobs to do.

Original poster
Hopelesshostel3 · 04/06/2021 15:01

@CrazyCatsAndKittens

I wasn’t going to say as I don’t want to be too outting but as I’ve NC; Navy. Which I think is pretty neutral and every other suit seems to be navy at the moment.

He doesn’t want to wear grey as he’s had a couple of grey suits in the past and he wears black to work.

OP posts:
AryaStarkWolf · 04/06/2021 15:04

[quote Hopelesshostel3]@CrazyCatsAndKittens

I wasn’t going to say as I don’t want to be too outting but as I’ve NC; Navy. Which I think is pretty neutral and every other suit seems to be navy at the moment.

He doesn’t want to wear grey as he’s had a couple of grey suits in the past and he wears black to work.[/quote]
There's going to be a lot of guests wearing Navy suits, ridiculous of her to tell you your partner can't wear a navy suit, tell her that, say fine, he won't get the tie but the suit is Navy, loads of people will be wearing navy suits fgs

Original poster
Hopelesshostel3 · 04/06/2021 15:04

@Inertia he’s already been given a massive list of jobs Blush

OP posts:
PleasantBirthday · 04/06/2021 15:05

It's completely unreasonable to veto a navy suit. There is no question of that. If he likes this suit, he should get it. Maybe wear a shirt that isn't white and a different colour and she'd have to be Columbo to notice.

PleasantBirthday · 04/06/2021 15:06

different colour tie....

BlueDucky · 04/06/2021 15:07

Navy suit is fine. Yes he should wear a different tie though.

WellLarDeDar · 04/06/2021 15:08

She is BU. Surely the groomsmen will be obvious because they'll all have button holes or something whereas your OH wont?

SecretSpAD · 04/06/2021 15:09

Bollocks to that. In my experience most men all wear a black, grey, blue suit to a wedding and no one bats an eyelid. If she wants him to look different then she needs to get the males in the wedding party in top hat and tails!

Sunbird24 · 04/06/2021 15:10

Totally agree with everyone else, get the suit, change the tie. If you’re having flowers as MOH can you pick a colour that’s in there so he still sort of matches you and get a tie and pocket square?

MaMaD1990 · 04/06/2021 15:11

Don't mention it to her again and tell him to buy the suit he likes but just a different colour tie. She sounds a complete PITA. I wouldn't worry too much if you're going to run for the hills after the wedding anyway!

SecretSpAD · 04/06/2021 15:12

Of course if you were going to turn up as a couple in top hat and tails and you in a long white dress....then she'd have a point Grin

boredbuttercup · 04/06/2021 15:12

I'd hazard that Atleast half of the male guests will be in navy suits as black is more funeral than wedding and that only leaves navy and grey for the majority of people who don't wear very bright suits. But I don't think the tie thing is U and I think you'd actually be a bit cheeky to have him turn up in a tie which you know is the same colour and the grooms party, couples who aren't the bride and groom really don't need to match at weddings. And even though your friend is being U about the suit I'd have him wear a different coloured shirt to the bridal party too for the sake of the friendship and keeping the peace.

Swipe left for the next trending thread