AIBU MIL get DD changed when she has her for the day

[Unicorn93]

So I send my DD to my MIL one day a week whilst I’m at work, I send her dressed and ready for the day, I get photos in the day and she’s in a completely different outfit one that she’s bought for her, and before sending her home again puts her back in the clothes I’ve sent her in. I sent her in her sandals as it’s been nice weather and on the photo she has put socks on with the sandals??

I’ve not said anything as I appreciate the help from her and she’s a good grandma but I can’t help but get annoyed by it

Weird but saves your washing and free childcare 🤷‍♀️ It’s one day a week, let it go.

(That said, if my DM had done this I’d have been furious, my DMIL wouldn’t have bothered me at all!)

I do this when my nephew stays for the weekend. He is the same age as my son, and I just want to make life easier for my sister to not have washing to do when he goes home.
I don't buy him anything specific though, just put him in my toddlers clothes.

It's a bit bonkers, but mostly harmless.

@SilverBangle

How old is DD?

I keep some clothes here for when I have DGS for the day. We usually do outdoor things like gardening, making mud pies, splashing in puddles, taking dog for a walk, which usually involves mud. He likes to get the paints out, tape lots of sheets of paper together and lay it on them grass, and do handprints, footprints or just paint with brushes.

Before he goes home I bath him and put him back in his clean clothes (the clothes he wore here) and wash his muddy/dirty/painted clothes. Saves his mother the job.

He is 3. I didn’t change him when he was a baby.

Wow you sound amazing! What a lucky boy your grandson is!

My mum is a pain for this. I once turned up at hers to find my 16 year old son in her old joggers and t-shirt because he was cutting the grass for her and she was worried he'd ruin his decent stuff (his own unbranded joggers and t-shirt!). She bought little overalls for all of my children when they were young, for playing out in her very neat, not at all muddy garden .

Totally agree! Can you look after my boys

I think it's quite sweet - regardless of the reason behind it. Could be to keep her clean, or just because she prefers the clothes she has chosen. It sounds like it comes from a place of love so what's the harm?

Mine used to do this. At the time it bothered me, I felt it was along the lines of treating her like a doll. But looking back, it's such an insignificant thing and for so short a time that it's really not worth getting yourself wound up by it.

*Chickenonaperch

What would annoy me us that you want your child to look a certain way. I love seeing little girls in dresses and it would really irritate me if someone took a dress off to put trousers on or an outfit I didn't like.

It would annoy you if the person who was looking after your child (I presume for free) put them in an outfit you didn't particularly like?*

Looking after them "for free" doesn't give you free run. E.g. they should only be fed what the parents say is ok.

Also in answer to your question. It would depend on how much I hated the other outfit. If for example i had dressed my daughter in a pretty floral dress and then discovered she had been out all day in a tacky slogan t shirt I would be upset

I wouldn't sweat it, just ignore

I would just let her get on with it.

I relate to this. I got on so well with my mil before ds was born. Now she drives me mad with his controlling she is over him. When she stays with us she will go and change him right after I've dressed him, claiming he is too cold. I bring her up on it and she'll then just do something else instead like fix his hat right after I've put it on his head, offer him food even though I've just said he's full and finished.
It's drives me batty!!

Just a thought OP Did your MIL have her own baby girl? She might have been waiting decades to dress a little girl up.