Why do my neighbours insist on sitting in their front garden?

[vnk21]

I am sure this makes me unreasonable but the incessant noise is giving me the rage.

I WFH, in an upstairs room at the front of the house. Today it's about 26 degrees here so I have the windows open. And all I can here is next door.

There's currently an entire family of them outside (mum, dad, and various kids). The parents have garden chairs out in the front garden and the kids are kicking a ball around - all of them are making a load of noise. Plus every time anyone walks past they have to engage them in conversation.

The houses in this street have small front gardens, Theirs is paved, and the size of 1 large car. Their back garden is at least twice the size. Why would you not sit out there?!

I'm not expecting silence, but the incessant shouting/screaming is so bloody irritating - especially when one of them goes indoors and they carry out a yelled conversation from the house to outside! First thing this morning it was lovely, birdsong and (because it is a relatively busy road) cars going past. But their noise is far more irritating than cars going past.

There's no solution other than closing the windows (and sweating in the heat) is there? Or hoping for rain.

I appreciate it's only a week and the schools will be back next week (so at least I should get some quiet 9-3), but I'm concerned they're going to be like this for the whole 6 weeks holiday which will drive me mad!

I'm in Melbourne.Years ago I was on a website that playfully identified what exemplified the typical Australian, and noted the sanctity of the back yard as the place to hang out: "only Poms and reffos" sit in the front garden, apparently.

On my street only two neighbours sit in their front garden, me and my NDN. Both forrin. Though to be fair, we're behind high fences so can't be seen.

On the other hand, the next house house down has converted their front garden to swings, as the back yard is entirely swimming pool. No problem for me except they have three screamy children, egged on by their screamy mother. It's horrible.

They are just enjoying themselves in their home.

You are trying to do office work in a domestic setting which will always be a compromise unless you can afford a detached house with a home office?

We use our front 'garden' because our back yard is a concreted slope and very shaded. I remember visiting my Gran as a child and sitting out front because she only had a tiny yard at the back too.

Me and the kids had a lovely day yesterday. Mine are quite quiet naturally, but even if they were more boisterous and loud I wouldn't worry because it is our home not an office.

DH works from home all the time now too and I take the view that once his work start paying me for the use of our bedroom every day as an office space, then they have to cope with the occasional bit background noise.

You are trying to do office work in a domestic setting which will always be a compromise unless you can afford a detached house with a home office?

Exactly. Perhaps people should be pushing harder for a return to the office?

how dare anyone expect that their parents show the slightest bit of respect for people who may be working or sleeping

Likewise, why should kids be curtailing their play for those wfh? You cant expect perfect conditions during office hours if you’re in a residential setting.

I don't expect perfect conditions. But there are lots of other families in this street who don't feel the need to make anywhere near these levels of noise (the family in the house attached to mine, for example who I never hear - their kids mainly play indoors, when they are out in the garden there's never any yelling and screaming either).

Also they're not in their home, they're outside it. If they were indoors, given that our houses are not attached, the volume would be significantly less.

It's about give and take and respecting others. I don't expect silence. Car/bus/ lorry noise is expected throughout the day, ditto passing dogs barking, birds tweeting and so on, the sound of power tools, lawnmowers etc. I'd find it a bit odd not to hear any of that. Also people talking as they pass, children laughing etc. It's the super loud screaming and shouting that this family do which is intolerable, and is inconsiderate of others. I would always make sure my children when that age never got too rowdy or loud so they disturbed others, and I certainly never permitted the screaming and shrieking. However these parents think their children can do no wrong, never tell them off and let them behave as they please - and this is the result.

They were 'out the front' again at 8am this morning, but after an hour or so of noise (which I could still hear despite the closed windows) seem to have gone out. Hopefully for the day.

I have a large back garden but never go in it, preferring to sit in the front.

this is because the front is concrete and south facing so much warmer. The back is also accessed from the basement so more hassle.

I also like seeing people go past in the street.

Also they're not in their home, they're outside it.

They’re on their own property.

I believe you can ask the council to come out and assess noise levels. But I doubt they’d be remotely interested in getting involved in what you’re describing. Sunny days are going to be noisier. That’s just how it is.

Have you a plan for returning to the office?

As I've said upthread, there is no plan for returning to the office, as there is no office to return to. The company I work for has closed the building permanently.

I think it's odd to camp out in the front garden if you've got a back garden.

And it's quite intimidating when you have to walk past and people stare at you.

I’d be looking for another job if I were you. Or office space to rent.

I think it's odd to camp out in the front garden if you've got a back garden.

Even if your front gets all the sun and your back none?

Which is the case for people who live across the riadtrip from us.

Road

@garlictwist

I have a large back garden but never go in it, preferring to sit in the front.

this is because the front is concrete and south facing so much warmer. The back is also accessed from the basement so more hassle.

I also like seeing people go past in the street.

Mumsnet algorithm: DOES NOT COMPUTE, DOES NOT COMPUTE!

Sits in front garden: council house benefit scrounger, dressing gown, shrieks like a banshee and flirts with the binmen.

Large rear garden with access from basement extension: Georgian townhouse, children privately educated, twin-set and pearls, champagne and canapes on the terrace.

The people across the road from us do this too and I don’t understand it at all. Their back garden overlooks a great big field so is much more pleasant but they’d rather sit in the front overlooking everyone else’s homes. They play crap music (s club 7 and basshunter feature quite loudly) and often dance along.. in the front garden so everyone can see. I don’t get it!

I think it's odd to camp out in the front garden if you've got a back garden.

Surely if you're lucky enough to have both, you can choose?

Of course you can choose. But why would you choose to put yourself so publicly on display to everyone? And for health reasons, why sit closer to exhaust fumes?

If you have a walled front garden, or one that is say 40-50 ft long or more (so you're a long distance from the road) then it's not the same, but in this street our front gardens are 15ft at most, the length of a large car. And there's traffic going up and down all day long.

The gardens aren't walled either, most people have an open driveway, so fence or wall either side between houses but nothing separating the garden from the pavement/ road.

We get that the noise they make is annoying and you don't feel you can move your wfh office from your front small bedroom

Half term in U.K. is nearly over. I totally recommend getting a fan and over the ear nose cancelling headphones 🎧

This sitting at front watching children play in street may pass soon once school returns, but you'll have 6 weeks of it in the summer- so maybe have a chat with your NDNs if they are approachable (?) and mention you can hear every word they shout to each other and also so can your work colleagues...

Sometimes people are thoughtless because they don't realise they are disturbing you. It depends on how well you approach it and if they are people that won't take offence

@vnk21

Of course you can choose. But why would you choose to put yourself so publicly on display to everyone? And for health reasons, why sit closer to exhaust fumes?

If you have a walled front garden, or one that is say 40-50 ft long or more (so you're a long distance from the road) then it's not the same, but in this street our front gardens are 15ft at most, the length of a large car. And there's traffic going up and down all day long.

Because they can choose. And do. Obviously different perception and priorities to you, which sucks for you, but they're perfectly entitled to act upon the basis of their perception and priorities on their own property. Now, if they tried to move in on your property, then you'd have grounds for complaint!

It's odd to sit in the front garden like this in my opinion.

Isn't that what wayne and waynetta used to do on that manky sofa?

Sitting out in the front or the back is just a cultural thing.

Making a lot of noise is anti-social although what counts as a lot is cultural.

But offices were created for a reason and the assumption that people can recreate these spaces at home seems very flawed.

I've got a front and a back garden. The front garden gets the sun in the morning and the back gets the sun in the afternoon. So I sit at the front in the morning and at the back in the afternoon.

I feel for you, but it could be worse. I've worked from home for many years and have a similar IT set up to you. All was fine until my neighbour's son took up drumming. His bedroom overlooks my office, so you can imagine what it was like in summer. His parents both worked outside the house. Even my top-of-the-range noise-cancelling headphones weren't enough. I recorded the din and played it back to my neighbours. They took away his drum kit!

Good Luck.

Tell me you live in a council house without telling me you live in a council house 🤣🤣🤣

Guilty! I grew up on an estate and everyone did this. It was to be sociable and mix with others. I now live in a council house on a new build estate. The one row of social housing everyone sits out front and mixes with one another. None of the privately owned homes do this.

Why is of your concern?

I'd probably just move to the other side of the house tbh. They dont know they are annoying you, but i do appreciate that you are trying to work and it's irritating. Easier to keep the peace and try not to let it get to you.