AIBU about my clothes or is DH?

[ACupOfTeaSolvesEverything]

Since lockdown 1 last year I’ve been slowly running out of clothes. Just wear and tear, cats clawing my leggings, torn jeans etc. Bought new jeans online at Christmas then got paint all over them 🙄
Anyway. Ordered more clothes online last week and they aren’t very nice so I kept an emergency pair of rubbish leggings and returned the rest.
Yesterday I wore the leggings and DH commented he could see my knickers and I may as well not wear them. I know that but I’ve not much else to cover my arse.
Today I’ve put on a short dress I don’t often wear but have owned for years. I’m going clothes shopping to an actual shop today. DH has just asked me if I’m going out naked. I asked him if he was being obnoxious on purpose two days in a row and he’s flabbergasted, says he’s just letting me know and I’d tell him if it were the other way round. (I wouldn’t. He frequently looks “interesting” but I figure it’s choice.)
AIBU or has he been massively rude? He’s not usually a twat 🤷🏻‍♀️

I would want to know if my leggings were see through and my dress was too short to be decent, which is what his comment implies. I don’t think husband and wife that are comfortable with each other always need to always stand on ceremony and use the utmost diplomacy. A couple of times at his lock down worst I have told DH he looks like a tramp.

I can’t understand why or how you let your clothes supply run down to a pair of see through leggings and a too short dress though.

I would want to know, but only you know if it was said to be mean.

I can’t imagine running out of wearable clothes though. I know shops have been closed but free returns have been mostly the norm.

@ACupOfTeaSolvesEverything

There’s a difference though between “I can see your pants love, you might want to be careful bending over” and “are you going out naked?!”

This is probably the difference that he hasn't quite grasped.

Perhaps he'd like to consider how he'd feel about the difference between you saying 'You need some new T-shirts love, that one's wearing thin' or 'Wow, those are some short shorts' and 'Haaaaahahahaha And what have you come as, little boy?' or 'Did you dress yourself this morning, or cover yourself in glue and roll through a rent-boy's wardrobe?'

Gliblet yes! Exactly! Just a bit of a rude way of telling me!

The dress was mid-thigh length, long sleeves, round neckline not revealing. I do wear it with leggings in winter so maybe that’s why he thought I looked “incomplete”...

As for why I had let my wardrobe run down I can thank my ADHD coupled with wfh and homeschooling a child with SEN in the middle of a pandemic. I can just about manage to keep us in clean pants! I did have two pairs of jeans until a week or so age, one pair I tore on a dog walk and the other I got acrylic paint all over.

He's body shaming you to destroy your confidence. Tell him to fuck off.

Fwiw I now have a lovely new summer wardrobe courtesy of Tesco, took DS this morning and splashed out on both of us 😁

I'd get an "are you going out naked?" comment from DH but it's usually followed up with "if so, I might join you". It depends on how you usually interact. DH is colourblind - I'd have no qualms at all with a swift "absolutely not, go and change" to any outfit that I thought the colours clashed on - and he'd be mortified if I let him out looking like a kid's TV presenter. Was your DH being insulting or was he being playful? What was the tone and how do you usually interact?

Ignore him. Allocate 5% of your wages for clothing allowance, I use a starling account for all my sink funds, and buy what ever clothes you like.

I'd want to be told if you could see my pants through my leggings and if my dress is so short you could see my pants haha. Both comments my DH would say. I told him his top was both too small and also on back to front this morning 😂😂. I do get why it would annoy you though!

My DP is no fashionista, but I would absolutely want him to tell me if my knickers were on show. I don’t like it when he comments on “fashion items” though - I bought a knitted tank top thing and he helpfully said it looked “like a string vest”. He just doesn’t get it sometimes!

The other day I was out by myself wearing a cream midi dress which has a kind of under layer slip, and the slip but had ridden up somehow (probably because of my bag rubbing it as I walked). A lovely lady grabbed me and told me the dress was now pretty much see-through. I had massive knickers on underneath so I am not sure if that made it better or worse!

@honeygirlz

He's body shaming you to destroy your confidence. Tell him to fuck off.

there's always one

he really was not, and the OP finally has clothes by now.

Someone tald me I was wearing stripy knickers. I was but had no idea my leggings were see-through. Not a big issue it was in the gym.

Start pointing out his 'interesting' outfits.

@fashionablefennel

yes, there's always a know it all like you. Wind your neck in.

honeygirlz
no need to project and get so angry, the OP has her clothes anyway

@fashionablefennel ok, love you're one pulling angry faces but you crack on

@honeygirlz

He's body shaming you to destroy your confidence. Tell him to fuck off.

I think that's a bit ott.

@honeygirlz

He's body shaming you to destroy your confidence. Tell him to fuck off.

You could win the Olympics with a leap like that.

You'll know better than us if he has form for this . If he's just being honest but tactless or mean and controlling.

Even with the dress, I have a few dresses i wear with leggings in winter that in no way shape or form would be appropriate to wear without.

Would you have picked that dress to wear like that if you weren't forced by lack of choice? If not,why not?

Do the three of you have no constructive advice for OP? You've posted nothing to OP and jumped on a pile on. Pathetic.

@honeygirlz

He's body shaming you to destroy your confidence. Tell him to fuck off.

@honeygirlz It really doesn't sound like it.

Another with no constructive advice for OP.

@honeygirlz How exactly is it body shaming? If my husband told me that my knickers were on show, I'd be glad as I'd want to know

Because OP didn't like the way he spoke to her and he said she may as well go out naked. Her knickers may not even be on show.

@honeygirlz

Another with no constructive advice for OP.

you projecting and making stuff up is the opposite of helping the OP!

The only one who seems to have a problem with their body on this thread is you.

Anyone else would mention to their partner that their choice of bottom clothing are see through and that you can see their underwear.

At most it would be "underwear shaming" if you must insist?

@fashionablefennel why are you so angry? OP has her clothes.