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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Driving without a license with baby in car

106 replies

Driverdilemma · 30/05/2021 23:35

Basically, someone I know is driving without a license. She has just bought a car and started driving lessons but doesn't want to wait for passing her test. She is 6 months pregnant and has a 1 year old in the car with her. Her mum, who also doesn't have a license, condones this and lets her daughter ferry her around as well. They say it's the norm, that everyone does this before they pass their test. Her mum found the concern funny and laughed. The way I see it is she is putting her child and unborn baby at risk. She is also putting other drivers at risk. In my opinion she is being monumentally stupid and selfish. She is never going to listen to any sense, she is a law student so knows the facts. WIBU to report it? Or is it none of my business?

OP posts:
SixDegrees · 31/05/2021 09:45

Yes, report.

Driving cars has the potential to kill people if the driver messes up, that’s the whole reason drivers are required to pass driving tests before driving solo. Plus she’s uninsured while doing this.

And all this about how reporting her could risk her future career - is someone who genuinely believes that it’s ok to drive without a licence or insurance really suited to a career in law?

If she’s regularly doing nursery drop offs / pick ups in the car, then it should be easier for the police to catch her in the act.

murbblurb · 31/05/2021 09:48

Zero fucks about her and to be honest,not many about the baby, especially if it is in a car seat which protects it. She could kill or injure someone's life partner or breadwinner.

Speak to the police on 101 with details.

ineedaholidaynow · 31/05/2021 09:51

If you know the nursery she uses you can let them know too as a safeguarding concern

motogogo · 31/05/2021 09:54

Report her name, address and numberplate.

I'm guessing she's not that young? Perhaps she had a licence from age 17 and is taking refresher lessons/advanced lessons?

mangodreams · 31/05/2021 09:55

I would do as a pp suggested and tell her you will report her if she doesn't stop and remind her this will mean she will not be able to practise law ever. If she says she doesn't care then that's up to her.

Suffolkpunch345 · 31/05/2021 10:00

That is ridiculous. Driving without a full licence in some countries is or was the law at some point. Are they British ?

I think it would be kind to give a warning shot and let them know you will report them and state the reasons why e.g endangering others. You could send an anonymous note?

WhoWants2Know · 31/05/2021 10:09

A mother at my child's school was caught doing this on the school run. The police actually stopped her at the school and impounded the car.

Ozanj · 31/05/2021 10:12

This happened to a friend of mind. Does she know that if she gets into an accident and the police are called social services will become involved? My friend lost her kids for 3 months while they made her pass through hoops to ensure she was a fit parent.

Zzelda · 31/05/2021 10:15

@MaMaD1990

Just taking a slightly different view on this - if you report her, her potential career will be down the toilet. Yes you are right that she shouldn't be doing this and it would technically be her own fault if she did lose any job prospects on the back of you reporting her, but can you not warn her before? As in, "I know you're driving around with no licence with your kid in the back, it's dangerous and you need to stop or someone/I will report you". If you're not friends and you aren't worried about a breakdown in friendship, could you not give her the opportunity to stop being so stupid?
You'd be doing the legal profession and any future clients of hers a favour by keeping her out of it. I doubt that anyone this dim would qualify anyway.
Zzelda · 31/05/2021 10:17

The trouble with warning her is - what are you going to do if she carries on? If you then report her she will 100% know that it was you, and she's almost certainly stupid enough to get vindictive about it as she won't acknowledge it was her own fault.

CookieClub · 31/05/2021 10:23

@Driverdilemma

I don't think it's ever right to drive without a licence, but the fact she is taking her child in the car leaves an especially bad taste in my mouth. She is picking up and dropping off at nursery every day. She thinks everyone does this kind of thing and yet she studies law... I hope she doesn't plan on practising law after graduating.
Presumably she has a valid provisional licence....so could it be that she is dense enough to think that she is legally allowed to drive herself, on her provisional, as long as she is displaying L plates..perhaps?? (Obviously not realising she should be under passenger supervision from a Full-licence holder)

I am baffled as to how anyone studying law can think this is legal, but maybe she genuinely doesn't get driving law...??

AdobeWanKenobi · 31/05/2021 10:35

@Nomorepies

Yes report, obviously Hmm
You say that but the vote currently stands at 385 with 4% thinking OP is BU. That means around 15 people who’ve seen this thread apparently think reporting an unlicensed driver is unreasonable.

They walk amongst us.

Jizzonmy · 31/05/2021 10:36

Report report report

Puzzledandpissedoff · 31/05/2021 10:54

For all those saying "her insurance will be void", what makes you think she's even applied for insurance? Hmm

As for "who the 7% of people are that voted Yabu", they're probably those doing the same thing ... after all there are plenty of them about

HagenDaz · 31/05/2021 11:12

Have you decided what you’re going to do OP?

Icanflyhigh · 31/05/2021 11:28

Report via crimestoppers.org.uk its anonymous and a marker will be put on her number plate which will be picked up on ANPR.

woodhill · 31/05/2021 11:34

Definitely report

How terrifying that she thinks this is common practice. Is she right?

user1492809438 · 31/05/2021 11:36

She won't be able to practise law with a conviction. However I'd report both of them, they are putting everyone's life at risk, not just their own familys'.

dottiedaisee · 31/05/2021 11:39

Report today ...her child has absolutely no control ...do it for her child and other innocent drivers . It a no brainer .

twoshedsjackson · 31/05/2021 11:40

As PP's have said, if she's studying law, she should be aware that she's aiming for professions where any infringement would preclude her from working. I can't see her getting far in a legal career with that attitude. She seems to have grown up in a setting where "rules are for other people" and the example is being passed on to a third generation.
And that's before we even get on to the far more urgent question of child safety, and the hazard she presents to everybody else on the road......
You can report her anonymously; if you don't, the consequences could be awful.

TwoAndAnOnion · 31/05/2021 11:42

@Driverdilemma

Basically, someone I know is driving without a license. She has just bought a car and started driving lessons but doesn't want to wait for passing her test. She is 6 months pregnant and has a 1 year old in the car with her. Her mum, who also doesn't have a license, condones this and lets her daughter ferry her around as well. They say it's the norm, that everyone does this before they pass their test. Her mum found the concern funny and laughed. The way I see it is she is putting her child and unborn baby at risk. She is also putting other drivers at risk. In my opinion she is being monumentally stupid and selfish. She is never going to listen to any sense, she is a law student so knows the facts. WIBU to report it? Or is it none of my business?
Generally I'm live and let live, but I would report this, not for her sake but for the poor sod who she hits and cant count claim on her non-existent insurance. Id report her mother too.

Crimestoppers
crimestoppers-uk.org/give-information/forms/give-information-anonymously

woodhill · 31/05/2021 11:50

@twoshedsjackson

As PP's have said, if she's studying law, she should be aware that she's aiming for professions where any infringement would preclude her from working. I can't see her getting far in a legal career with that attitude. She seems to have grown up in a setting where "rules are for other people" and the example is being passed on to a third generation. And that's before we even get on to the far more urgent question of child safety, and the hazard she presents to everybody else on the road...... You can report her anonymously; if you don't, the consequences could be awful.
Yes, why is her dm endorsing this.
ineedaholidaynow · 31/05/2021 12:00

@TwoAndAnOnion what about her DC in the car. She hasn’t passed her test yet, we don’t know how competent a driver she is. She is putting her child at risk never mind anyone else she might drive in to

JellyBabiesFan · 31/05/2021 12:02

You absolutely have a moral obligation to report her. Please call 111 and give details of the car, address and when she does the nursery drop off. People die on the road each die and many are attibuted to poor driving.

MiddleClassMother · 31/05/2021 12:03

I would phone 101 to report it. She is not only endangering herself and her children, but many others on the road. Someone in my town was killed when they were run over by someone without a license. How anyone can condone it, shocks me.

Her insurance (if she has it) will also be void.