To beg social services to do something

[Realitea]

I live in a posh area and nearby, there’s a young woman who is extremely mentally unwell. Her dh has left recently. Her children are not getting to school. They’re not being fed proper meals. The mother leaves them with whoever she can pay/bribe to watch them for her, usually cleaners. Her live in house staff have all left as they can’t take it anymore. She cannot put anyone’s needs before her own. She doesn’t work but always has ‘important calls’ to make.
She’s taking many prescription drugs.
The crisis team have visited, social services have visited, the police have visited. (Police are very regular now) Nothing is being done. It’s getting worse. The children are now trying to get into my house or the mother bangs on the door pushing them through telling me she’s desperate as she has such important business to attend to. I’m working from home and it’s causing major disruption. Tonight I broke - I told her this is unacceptable and she must get help. It falls on deaf ears. Why aren’t any authorities doing anything? Is it because it’s clear she has money? Why haven’t any authorities actually gone in her house? She always persuades them to speak outside. Because the house is disgusting inside. At least there are cleaners going in now. I just feel I can’t take any more. I hate seeing the children suffer like this but the more we help the less likely it is she will get help I think. Also she’s accused a couple of neighbours of very serious crimes and I’m worried if I get too helpful/involved she might turn on me and I’ll get accused of something next.
Another neighbour got a text last night asking if she would put her children to bed for her! We’ve got our own children, it’s very hard to manage all this.

Honestly I think next next she forces her children on you, you should phone ss whilst they are there.

Good idea. I was considering calling the police but yes I think SS would be better.

Every time this happens report it. Like the other pps idea of calling the authorities when the kids are at yours.

Ring the police not SS. They are very unlikely to come out straight away as they are not first responders.Police reports are primary evidence.

Ok. Next time I’ll do that. I was going to keep a diary but I’m just going to report every time. I don’t understand why none of the authorities are leaving this neglect.

If she's white, female and rich, there's little-to-no chance that they'll do anything. DH's mother was very similar - he and his sister suffered all kinds of abuse and neglect and no one would do anything. They simply know that there's no point attempting to remove children from someone who will make a good impression in court.

Keep reporting to SS. And repeat. The fact the children aren’t getting to school will also be flagged so you’re not alone. Just because she’s “posh” it will not mean this is ignored.

Without going into detail, I’m a foster carer and look after a child from a very similar background.

Where’s the husband??

That’s what I feared Babbly
Not sure how good of an impression she could make though as more and more people are noticing now what’s happening
The fact she’s gone for about six different psychiatric assessments is a red flag to them too I should think. If she doesn’t like what one says she’ll go to the next
Crisis team have been out too
The more that can be added to her ‘file’ maybe the more likely some action will be taken

Puppymonkey - so it can happen then! I would love to foster, I bet it’s very rewarding. Something to think about once mine have flown the nest.

The husband has left and not able to return

The husband has left and not able to return He may be unable to return to the property but why is he incapable of looking after his own children? He's as much at fault as she is, if not more if she has mental health issues.

I'll never understand why so many people need others to tell them to report things to the relevant authorities. Surely you automatically do if you have concerns about anyone who is vulnerable?!

I have reported twice now. My question was more why aren’t they doing anything.
The husband is incapable of looking after his own children because he can’t return to the house, where they live. I blamed him as much as her but when I learned what had happened I realised he is powerless in the situation.

The bar to get children taken into care is very high. That is why to looks like nothing is being done. Neglect in particular is very hard to get children taken into care for. Just keep reporting.

The husband cant ask to take the children?

Although in most situations like this SS would ask the father to take care of the children. So I would suspect the father has said no.

I used to be a Local Authority social worker and had statutory powers to investigate instances of children deemed to be "at risk".
We worked with families, with the involvement of other agencies, to try and find ways of improving their situation, with the aim of keeping families together.
But we also had the power to remove children, and ultimately to apply to the court for care orders.
Based on your post, I am absolutely horrified that nothing is being done about these children, who are very clearly being neglected.

The husband is incapable of looking after his own children because he can’t return to the house, where they live That makes no sense. He can apply for mediation then court. Plus if social services are involved they will have or will do ask him to take them. Sounds like can't be arsed tbh, parents don't have to live together to parent.

Why are you opening the door to her? She bangs on it, call the police and tell them your insane psychotic neighbour who's on drugs won't leave you alone.

I know, I am going to stop going to the door now. I’m too bloody nice. I assumed it was a parcel delivery as they always come at that time but it wasn’t!
@LindyLou2020 thanks for your reply, just wondering what would happen if the neighbour refused the help offered, what would happen there? Whenever anyone tries to talk to her about getting help for her mental health she gets really angry
As for the father, there is a lot more to the case there. I can’t say for fear of outing myself. He hasn’t said no though. He legally can’t go near them

Thresholds for intervention (especially very expensive intervention like removal and court proceedings) are extremely high at the moment. As other have said, report and keep reporting. Give detail about what you observe of the impact on the children (emotional / other) of this neglect. Each and every time. It will build a picture and a case for more adequate safeguarding of these children.

What are their appropriate ages?

@Realitea No one can be forced to get mental health help unless they are a danger to themselves or others. Again the thresholds are high.

@Realitea

I know, I am going to stop going to the door now. I’m too bloody nice. I assumed it was a parcel delivery as they always come at that time but it wasn’t! *@LindyLou2020* thanks for your reply, just wondering what would happen if the neighbour refused the help offered, what would happen there? Whenever anyone tries to talk to her about getting help for her mental health she gets really angry As for the father, there is a lot more to the case there. I can’t say for fear of outing myself. He hasn’t said no though. He legally can’t go near them

Do you not have a spy hole? Look through that. If you haven't got one, just 'Who is it?' If it's psycho neighbour tell her to go away. FFS. If she keeps banging or leaves the kids there, call the bloody police! Don't let them in or things will carry on with her being allowed to get away with it.

Yes it’s police you need. Social services cannot remove a child without a court order. Police can do emergency police protection (I can’t remember if it’s 48 or 72 hours) which by the time that expires the local authority usually has then been to court to get an appropriate order (usually an interim care order or a section 20)