Going from 2 to 3 kids is the hardest family size to transition into?

[scandicandi]

I have 2 kids (3 and 1 years old) and DH and I would love a third.

We found going from 0 to 1 kid traumatic and then amazing. Going from 1 to 2 has been easy and so enjoyable.

But AIBU to think going from 2 to 3 is a different ball game as you are outnumbered?

Would love to hear other people's experiences.

Everyone will have different experiences OP.

I found 0-1 fine and 1-2 utterly horrific.

No chance of a 3rd.

A lot of things for families are catered to 2 parents 2 kids, like holiday packages and family tickets to theme parks etc. So I think the leap can be expensive in that sense. I would have thought the mental/physical drain would be bigger going from 1 to 2 than 2 to 3, but I think it's very dependent on age gaps!

0-1 also fine for me. 1-2 awful. Second is just over 2 and it’s still fairly awful. I keep waiting for it to get better and it hasn’t much!

The main thing is that you forgo any me-time as it’s hard for one adult to have 3 at once when they are very young. Most people I know with 3 that manage well have Nannies or Grandparents close by.

I found 0-1 ok 1-2 horrific and 2-3 the easiest of the lot !

It's not so much that you are outnumbered, but that everything seems to be set up for 2+2.

Going from 1 to 2 didn't cost us a penny. We probably made a profit on dc 2 because of Child Benefit! But going from 2 to 3 was expensive. We had to buy an MPV because a regular family car cannot take 3 carseats or boosters.

I found 1- 2 the hardest but think it depends on the age gap. There was an 8 year gap between them so I'd forgotten about the harder bits of toddlers and babies and remembered everything through Rose tinted glasses, my 2nd was a shock to the system.

2-3 was a joy

I have five and only found 0-1 and 1-2 to be difficult transitions.

0-1 fine 1-2 blood nightmare. No third on the horizon!

Best thing we did. I read everything online about having 3, pondered for best part of a year, but knew in my heart someone was missing from our family. The moment she was born we felt complete. She slotted in, we were very relaxed and yes, getting out of the house can seem an effort, but overall we haven't really struggled. I do feel more tired though and when only one is home it seems very relaxing

This is really interesting as I am ttc #3 at the moment.

I found going from 0-1 absolutely horrific despite ds1 being very much planned. Obviously it did get a lot better but I was grieving for my pre-baby life for a long time.

Going from 1-2 was an absolute piece of cake. I don’t know if it’s because ds2 was an easier newborn or if my expectations were different or that I was used to being a mum and my life didn’t change too much. Probably all of the above.

I know several people that found it quite the opposite though and found 0-1 easy and 1-2 tough so interesting to see how #3 will slot in.

I really wish I hadn't opened this thread. Currently pregnant with my second. 🤣

For me 0-1 was the hardest, I found 2 to 3 easy. I love having 3 DC, they are all grown now and get on so well. I feel very fortunate.

0-1 was okay for me but 1-3 hard. 2-3 was okay. I mean it’s fairly chaotic and we planned to stop at 2 but I’m very glad number 3 is here. It’s down to individual family dynamics though. My eldest needs his own space more and the 2 younger ones are massive extroverts so I’m glad they have each other. I think it’s helps that number 2 has never been an only child so you don’t have quite the same adjustment in that regard.

2-3 definatly the hardest, whenever I see someone have a third now I just pity them!
It's the increased expense and the fact it's so much harder to fit everything in, the washing and general 'child admin' is never ending

0-1 - fabulous
1-2 - still great but much harder than 0-1. Mobile baby and toddler is a thousand times harder than newborn and toddler though, so it was a gentle introduction.

1-2 really hard, 2-3 much easier

It was easy for us👍🏻
0-1 was soooo hard!

0-1 utter joy
1-2 much harder still happy
2-3 just extends the lack of sleep etc but as a family it's amazing. The kids are best of friends.

2-3 was way easier in my experience. Baby just slotted into the routine, I had 3 under 4. That said baby 2 was a nightmare and screamed for pretty much his first 3 months so anything was going to be easier than that! I have 4 now so transition from 2-3 obviously didn't put me off kids

2-3 broke us. I think we were expecting them to just slot in. We were also expecting #1 and #2 to get easier quicker than they did.

It's easier having all 3 as they entertain each other.

I know someone who went from 1-3 last summer with twin boys. Honestly looks like the worst situation ever

But more seriously, that may because the mum seems to love it while I know that dad is miserable

Somebody told us having two was like having pets and having three was like running a zoo!

We planned for two, had three at four and under at one point. The hardest transition is from none to one, not two to three. You worry so much less with each new one.

My two are ten and six

I suffered and still suffer from
Depression since having my second .

There's no way I found physically or mentally have another child

2-3 is a big leap