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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Car crash debacle

247 replies

guesswhatteapot · 26/05/2021 23:36

So I picked my son up from school and drove home the usual route. Pulled up outside my driveway on the left hand side of the road. We have a shop opposite and it's a main road so always busy with cars parked outside the shop. I sat in my car waiting for the traffic to go past, looked in my rear view mirror, no traffic. Started to reverse onto my driveway. Next thing a car hits the side of me and rips off the front of my car. She must have been parked across from me on the opposite side after going to the shop. She must have pulled out when no traffic coming, completely ignored my reverse lights and ploughed into the front of my car. We exchange numbers and she says she will text me later with her details... no text. I phoned my insurance company, my car is undriveable . I text her and she replies with "Your fault, I was stationary, you reversed into me, not going through insurance company, etc.
I replied that if she was stationary and I reversed into her A) why was the damage to my car at the front and not the back and B) why was she parked across my driveway blocking my access to my driveway?
AIBU to think that she just doesn't want to go through our insurance companies and is trying to blame me for this?

OP posts:
DumbestBlonde · 27/05/2021 11:12

[quote GreenWillow]@DumbestBlonde

If you didn’t see them, then by definition you were going too fast for the bend.

Your stopping distance should never be more than the distance you can see ahead of you.

Your driving caused the cyclists to crash, hence you were in the wrong. You seem to think it’s actually amusing that they were unable to uncleat in time to avoid the crash too.

My husband and eldest DS are both club cyclists - people like you are the reason my heart is in my mouth every time they go out on a group ride Sad

Your nasty comment about their kit says everything we need to know about your attitude too.

Not expecting an apology, just having to ensure my DH’s life assurance is up to date largely due to attitudes like yours.[/quote]
I feel inclined to submit the diagram, which I think I may still have Hmm

ANYthing that encountered them on that bend - would have collided - even other cyclists. It is blind and needs care., which the were not taking. I was taking great care in my car - I also ride it on my bike - and KEEP MY EARS OPEN. Not babbling along as though the only people in the world.

You cannot make them totally right, and me totally wrong in that situation, I'm sorry, you can't. They were NOT AWARE of their environment - heck, it could have been someone who WAS NOT going as slowly as I did that they met - and then they would have been on the bloody car bonnet, or even under the tyres!

Criticise my attitude all you like but I am a far safer driver to (hah) bump into than many many others, I can promise you that!

I have never yet NOT taken into consideration a cyclist or group of them, even going at their speed for what seems like quite some distance given the roads nearby. I also pass WIDE AND SLOW, indicate, take plenty of room to pull back in - same with horses and enyone else I might meet who is slower than a vehicle. But there are limits for God's sake.

The assumptions you are making are ridiculous and make you look bad. When I suppose it is ME that you want to look bad.

The joke about the purple leggings (I wear themself) was because he was trying to claim for them; they suffered NO INJURY, apart from to their pride.

I expect the Life Assurance remark is tongue incheeek - but I suppose that he has Cyclist Insurance as well - in case, you know - he meets someone like me on one of his Club rides. Because if I EVER have an incident [not necessarily in my car...] that involves a bike, you can bet I will be after them on THEIR insurance!

I am not sure why you think I would even consider apologising. You, on the other hand........ (no?)

It's gone past that now anyway Confused - and so quickly Sad

NotAnotherPushyMum · 27/05/2021 11:14

It’s likely that they’ll say you were at fault because you were the one manoeuvring. I was reversing out of a space, was actually in first gear and ready to pull away when someone drove into me. Insurance decided I was at fault and weren’t interested in listening to anything else because I was the one making a manoeuvre, even though the other driver clearly wasn’t paying attention.

GreenWillow · 27/05/2021 11:25

@DumbestBlonde

Wow, I don’t think I really need to add anything to your previous post to demonstrate my point.

You know that old saying about giving someone enough rope to hang themselves...?

starfishmummy · 27/05/2021 11:27

Stip tzlking to her and pass everything to your insurers.

GreenWillow · 27/05/2021 11:29

Anyway, back to the actual OP,

Can you try very hard to place the other driver as having parked on the opposite side of the road?

The Highway Code actually prohibits parking in this way (for precisely this reason).

One of the shops much have some form of CCTV?

I know it’s too late now, but I have front and rear dash cams fitted to my car for precisely this reason. There are so many drivers like this woman (and @DumbestBlonde ) on the road that the £200 or so it cost to fit them will be so worth it in the long run.

GreenWillow · 27/05/2021 11:30

I mean parking facing against the flow of traffic, it’s actually an offence in its own right in several jurisdictions.

Lovemusic33 · 27/05/2021 11:30

Not worth reporting to the police, hand her details over to your insurance company, you should have legal cover through insurance? Send the insurance company your version of events and the photos.

At first I though you were possibly in the wrong as you were the one reversing out but if she hit the front of your car you must have been pretty far out into the road when she hit you? She was either not concentrating or was speeding?

Whythesadface · 27/05/2021 11:32

Did you know any cyclist under 18 is deemed to Never be at fault.
Can claim against you till they are 18.
I was doing 5 mph turning right already turning, signals ECT.
The bike overtook me as going too fast , and went over my bonnet.
It was my fault apparently.

HoppingPavlova · 27/05/2021 11:32

Just to clarify, I did phone my insurance company straight after and gave them her phone number and car registration so it has to go through the insurance companies whether she wants to or not.

This makes it even more perplexing as to why you have contacted her at all, makes no sense?

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 27/05/2021 11:42

If she was parked and you were driving then she has pulled out without checking so surely she is at fault....

Also, if I understand the diagram correctly, you were facing the correct way for the traffic at all times, but she was parked up outside the shop pointing against the flow of traffic? Although this is very rarely pursued, it's against the Highway Code; I don't know for sure, but it might even be technically illegal.

I don't know how the law sees it, but if you're on the opposite side of the road, I'd say the onus is on you to check extremely carefully that the entire road is completely clear for some way in both directions before you make the dangerous manoeuvre of crossing the whole road to get back on to the correct side.

If a car on the other side of the road were driving along as normal, whilst you were reversing on your own side (having checked it's safe behind you) and that car just randomly swerved into your lane and into your side, nobody would think you were to blame.

As PPs have said, if she genuinely believed that you were wholly at fault, why wouldn't she want to claim for her damaged car on your insurance? Very fishy.

Some insurance defaults are theoretically sensible, but some are outrageously unfair. Such as the assumption that the driver behind - i.e. the one with the damage to the front of their car - is always to blame for not leaving enough room, even though the one in front could have reversed, put their foot down and slammed backwards right into them.

LongCOVID · 27/05/2021 11:46

Don't bother to engage with her. Give the details to the insurance company (and leave them to deal with it) and report her to the police for failing to give details (and mention it appears to be unsafe driving to them - if she didn't see a car, she would not have seen a pedestrian, cyclist etc)
She may not be insured. She doesn't appear to be a safe driver.
Try not to get stressed by it. And be prepared to block her number if/when she gets angry that the police and insurance are dealing with it - don't get involved directly (it will be better for your stress levels and for the claim).

Original poster
guesswhatteapot · 27/05/2021 11:55

I only contacted her after I informed my insurance company because I've never had an accident before and thought it was correct to give the other driver my details, insurance company, car registration, address,etc.
I haven't contacted her since but she has sent me a text claiming that she was parked up behind me and that I reversed into her stationary car. But there's no damage to the back of my car 😳
I am just going to ignore.
Also, does anyone know how long these things take to get sorted. I did tell the insurance company that I needed a courtesy car and they said they would contact the garage to come out to look at my car but no word yet.

OP posts:
YellowScallion · 27/05/2021 11:58

My car is only just now getting repaired for an accident mid April

NamechangedGamechanged12 · 27/05/2021 12:08

I got a courtesy car within a day or two after someone hit my car

GabsAlot · 27/05/2021 12:10

im afriad it takes a while but they should assess it quickly and giv eyou a car if you have that in your policy

NavigatingAdolescence · 27/05/2021 12:11

They won’t give a courtesy car if the car is written off.

Doris86 · 27/05/2021 12:11

@guesswhatteapot

I only contacted her after I informed my insurance company because I've never had an accident before and thought it was correct to give the other driver my details, insurance company, car registration, address,etc. I haven't contacted her since but she has sent me a text claiming that she was parked up behind me and that I reversed into her stationary car. But there's no damage to the back of my car 😳 I am just going to ignore. Also, does anyone know how long these things take to get sorted. I did tell the insurance company that I needed a courtesy car and they said they would contact the garage to come out to look at my car but no word yet.
Let her lie to her insurance company and incriminate herself. Take photos of the damage to your car, including the back to show it is undamaged, and provide them to the insurance company.
EverythingRuined · 27/05/2021 12:12

@Nodal

Why are you engaging with this woman, just give all the details you have, your version and diagram to your insurer and let them get on with it.
This. No point giving this any thought really. Hand it over to your insurers to deal with.
BungleandGeorge · 27/05/2021 12:14

Generally I think you have to pay extra for the courtesy car cover on the insurance as an option. The garage will sometimes be able to lend you one whilst your car is in for repairs but it’s not guaranteed. You need to read the insurance documents and see what they say. If it’s written off usually you just get the money no courtesy car.
Usually the garage gives the insurance company an estimate and if it’s a big claim the insurance get a second opinion. In my experience it’s not a quick process- sorry. I’d it definitely not driveable? Did you get it back on to your drive?If it’s deemed her fault you can try an claim the cost back from her insurance.

GabriellaMontez · 27/05/2021 12:18

Take plenty of photos. Do you have photos of hers too? Make a written 'statement' now while it's all fresh in your mind. Ask in the shop for witnesses or CCTV.

Original poster
guesswhatteapot · 27/05/2021 12:27

The car isn't a write off I don't think. It starts and I can't see any damage apart from the body work. If it wasn't for the fact that the front is hanging off and dragging on the floor I would have driven it to the garage myself. I do have courtesy car included in my insurance.

OP posts:
ArgyleIsle · 27/05/2021 12:29

You'll only be entitled to a courtesy car if it is part of your policy. Sometimes this is a added chargeable extra. Check your policy to see if you are covered?

I wasn't with mine. I had to hire a car and claim the costs back once liability of the other driver was proved.

ArgyleIsle · 27/05/2021 12:30

Sorry, crossed post!

SnackSizeRaisin · 27/05/2021 12:41

It may still be written off if only bodywork damaged. Bodywork is expensive to replace. If it costs more to repair than the value of the car they will write it off. It's nothing to do with safety or what type of damage. Anyway hopefully they will come out soon. Happened to me once - they only came to my area on a Tuesday so had to wait a few days and take a day off work.
If they do write it off and give you cash, you don't have to accept the first amount they offer. They always offer low but you can haggle if you have evidence. It's worth having a look now to see what you think your car is worth based on similar cars on autotrader etc. Then you won't be caught on the hop if they phone and offer you an amount.
Don't worry too much if they find it's your fault - I had a car written off (vandalism but they counted it as my fault as no one else to pursue for the money) and I only lost 3 out of 8 years of no claims bonus, and it didn't hugely affect my premiums.
Also don't have any further contact with the other woman, it's unnecessary and will just stress you out.

aiwblam · 27/05/2021 12:45

The insurance were quick when someone rammed my car. The person did actually admit it though and it was their insurers who organised for my car to be fixed immediately

That said, someone also rammed dh car and dh insurer sorted it quickly, even though it was the other person’s fault and they subsequently denied responsibility. Dh insurer took them to court and won, but dh did not have anything to do with it.