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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Car crash debacle

247 replies

guesswhatteapot · 26/05/2021 23:36

So I picked my son up from school and drove home the usual route. Pulled up outside my driveway on the left hand side of the road. We have a shop opposite and it's a main road so always busy with cars parked outside the shop. I sat in my car waiting for the traffic to go past, looked in my rear view mirror, no traffic. Started to reverse onto my driveway. Next thing a car hits the side of me and rips off the front of my car. She must have been parked across from me on the opposite side after going to the shop. She must have pulled out when no traffic coming, completely ignored my reverse lights and ploughed into the front of my car. We exchange numbers and she says she will text me later with her details... no text. I phoned my insurance company, my car is undriveable . I text her and she replies with "Your fault, I was stationary, you reversed into me, not going through insurance company, etc.
I replied that if she was stationary and I reversed into her A) why was the damage to my car at the front and not the back and B) why was she parked across my driveway blocking my access to my driveway?
AIBU to think that she just doesn't want to go through our insurance companies and is trying to blame me for this?

OP posts:
HPmagic · 27/05/2021 08:06

Message her and say that's fine I will involve the Police and say you have a camera att your house that caught the incident so it's no issue, to see if it scares her a bit

Horehound · 27/05/2021 08:11

@HPmagic

Message her and say that's fine I will involve the Police and say you have a camera att your house that caught the incident so it's no issue, to see if it scares her a bit
No, don't message her at all. She doesn't need to be communicated with. Ops insurers will deal with it.
Mrgrinch · 27/05/2021 08:12

You have to need to speak to her at all. Call your insurer and pass on the details you have and they will take it from there and should find out who she is insured by. She is committing an offence and knows she is at fault.

vivainsomnia · 27/05/2021 08:16

Either or both of you could be in the wrong.

If you were parked there, and not yet signalled when she pulled out but you fail to see her because you were looking at cars coming from the back rather than side, than you’d be in the wrong. It makes sense that you would hit her with your front right as you turn to reverse.

Similarly, she might have pulled out as your were already engaged in your manoeuvre, indicating, and she also only looked at cars coming from the road, she’d be in the wrong.

Both are responsible for looking for hazards from all directions.

As you didn’t really see her and therefore don’t know at which point she manoeuvred out, and most likely neither did she see you or she wouldn’t have gone out, you won’t know and neither will the insurance companies, and this will likely result in a 50/50.

Definitely go through your insurance.

EarringsandLipstick · 27/05/2021 08:20

There's potential for both of you to be at fault.

Why on Earth didn't you a) exchange insurance details (it's just a photo of the discs surely?) and b) report to police, which is a requirement of an insurance claim? (Well, it is in Ireland)

Anyway. As everyone else has said, report to your insurance today.

Minezatea · 27/05/2021 08:22

I had a CF pull onto my side and smash wing mirrors and then refuse to take responsibility! She had the nerve to send me a bill for her damage. I just passed on all the info to the insurance company and she went quiet then. Some people will do anything to avoid taking responsibility for themselves. I would suggest stop interacting with her and she is not going to get it and it will just be like banging your head against a brick wall.

ThursdayWeld · 27/05/2021 08:24

@EarringsandLipstick

There's potential for both of you to be at fault.

Why on Earth didn't you a) exchange insurance details (it's just a photo of the discs surely?) and b) report to police, which is a requirement of an insurance claim? (Well, it is in Ireland)

Anyway. As everyone else has said, report to your insurance today.

We don't have "discs" in the UK. We also don't have to report car damage to the police.

What is actually the point of providing legal advice from a completely different country?!

ThursdayWeld · 27/05/2021 08:25

Anyway, as PPs have said, all you have to do is contact your own insurance company. No further communication with her required.

SofiaMichelle · 27/05/2021 08:25

@EarringsandLipstick

There's potential for both of you to be at fault.

Why on Earth didn't you a) exchange insurance details (it's just a photo of the discs surely?) and b) report to police, which is a requirement of an insurance claim? (Well, it is in Ireland)

Anyway. As everyone else has said, report to your insurance today.

No such thing as 'discs' in the UK.

It's not a requirement to report to the police unless there's an injury, in the UK.

MrsTulipTattsyrup · 27/05/2021 08:28

Your insurers will not thank you for trying to do their job for them, and will tell you to stop communicating with the other party.

So just make your report (you should have done so immediately), give them the details you have, and let them do their work. Most policies include a provision for a hire car if your own is repairable (often write offs are excluded) so you shouldn’t be without transport while it’s put right.

This is really a very straightforward process so stop trying to do an investigation and leave it to people who know what they’re doing.

EarringsandLipstick · 27/05/2021 08:31

We don't have "discs" in the UK. We also don't have to report car damage to the police.

What is actually the point of providing legal advice from a completely different country?!

Thanks for correcting me. I did appreciate it may be different, hence noting I was in Ireland.

BeenAsFarAsMercyAndGrand · 27/05/2021 08:32

All this debate, and yet you still don't appear to have passed her details to insurers and police? Just do it. You don't need to contact her at all, in fact it's best if you don't.

EarringsandLipstick · 27/05/2021 08:32

No such thing as 'discs' in the UK.

It's not a requirement to report to the police unless there's an injury, in the UK.

Thanks. Sorry, I wasn't aware.

honeygirlz · 27/05/2021 08:34

Definitely report to your insurers.

m0therofdragons · 27/05/2021 08:36

My insurance company was amazing. I wasn’t in my car but an old lady reversed into my car in a private car park. There was cctv so I gave them the car reg and they pursued it and never even watched the cctv - letter to her saying in x date she’d hit x car at x venue and to contact them. She did and paid up. I honestly didn’t expect anything but was so fed up as 4 people hit my car that year. I’m never buying a black car again!

SofiaMichelle · 27/05/2021 08:37

@EarringsandLipstick

No such thing as 'discs' in the UK.

It's not a requirement to report to the police unless there's an injury, in the UK.

Thanks. Sorry, I wasn't aware.

There's no need to apologise! Smile
ThursdayWeld · 27/05/2021 08:38

That "discs" thing does seem like a good idea though!

Bigtruth · 27/05/2021 08:39

For the love of God why do people give advice if they don't have a clue what they're talking about?

Sometimes it's better to say nothing but everyone thinks their uneducated opinion is somehow important.

Call the police because she hasn't given her details despite the OP clearly stating that they have a name, phone number and reg number? I mean, please, give me strength.

Report to insurer, that's it. Done.

Petronius16 · 27/05/2021 08:40

Do not engage with her. Give the details you have to your insurance company. Leave to them.

Nothingyet · 27/05/2021 08:41

@ThursdayWeld

That "discs" thing does seem like a good idea though!
We could also use them to show the car is taxed. They could be displayed on the bottom left of the windscreen.
honeygirlz · 27/05/2021 08:43

She eventually replied with "I have decided not to pursue a claim regarding the damage that you did to my car with your car. My husband can fix it."

This is a text from a guilty person. If you were at fault she would probably go through insurer's.

Quartz2208 · 27/05/2021 08:49

@ChubbyLittleManInACampervan

Yes, I think you are mistaken OP in thinking that with an accident you only call the insurance company of the car perceived to be at fault

That is not how it works

You both call your insurers. They hash it out between them. The outcome may be be: your fault/50-50/her fault

If she is not insured, your insurance company will deal with her directly

Hope it all gets sorted out

This - I think you are totally misunderstanding how this process works. You contact your insurers and you give them her car registration and that is your part done.

Your insurers should send you a car to use (because that is what insurance is there for) and they will work out the claim - most likely to be 50/50 (because like it or not it probably is) and take it from there

I am not sure what you are expecting but I think you will lose some of your no claims bonus

Erikrie · 27/05/2021 08:54

Just give the insurance company your details and her phone number, registration. Explain what happened. Ask for a hire car.They'll do the rest and chase her up.

EvilPea · 27/05/2021 08:59

I bet the shop has CCTV.

Although I would prepare myself that its going to end up 50/50

Notnownotneverever · 27/05/2021 09:01

Shame as most PPs I don’t understand your issue. You just report this to your own insurance and go through them. You give them the details you have like her Reg no and phone no and they pursue her / her insurance company.