For the love of all things... read the thread

[Peachesarepeach]

I'm so tired of posters not reading the thread and either missing crucial updates or repeating the same comment 500 times.

Go on, I dare you to tell me I'm being unreasonable... but only if you read all the previous comments!

I have been thinking of this too OP, I've come to the conclusion that very few people actually ever read the OP properly let alone the thread.
I usually read upto about page 3, because by then the random questions start...
Some examples...

OP... "My husband never wants to talk to me"
(Response by post 2 in some cases, but by every post on page 3) is.... "Have you tried talking to him?"

Another...
OP... "My husband never listens to what I say"
Responses here grow legs pretty quickly. It's usually
"Do you think he's got an ASD?"
Or.... "LTB"
These usually are said numerous times.

The one about the lady passing is very sad, it's actually very disrespectful, but people aren't bothered, they're already off sprinkling their pearls of wisdom on another thread at page 42 😮

i never register the usernames of commenters anyway, so they can make an ass of themselves....its all anon here anyway

@Everleigh2021

i never register the usernames of commenters anyway, so they can make an ass of themselves....its all anon here anyway

me neither.

I try to quote the posts I am replying to, so it doesn't matter who wrote them really!

[quote Everleigh2021]@EarringsandLipstick nah you're alright ta.....i'll do it my own way

always have, always will. soz an all[/quote]
How eloquent 🙄

I guess, but equally, and maybe more to point for the love of all things stop appointing yourself thread police!

@PurpleDaisies

It’s really off when a poster has admitted they were out of order and then new posters arrive to kick them. The show op’s posts function ought to have stopped that now but some people think their two cents is too important to check they’re not going to look like a twit.

^^ exactly.

It's rare enough that OP's accept a YABU consensus or that they are wrong. When they do, it's incredibly unfair that they still get posters haranguing them.

Apart from being unfair to OP, it also derails the thread.

@GirlCrush

its only mumsnet....a bit of a time wasting forum, nothing special!

why should anyone have to plough through loads of messages before giving an opinion?

This is it in a nutshell. We all have some time to spare but then, we have jobs, sandwiches to make, a pile of dirty plates etc...

It's like reading a woman's magazine problem page - and for the most part we're not that invested in the advice or the outcome.

@GucciJackie

I guess, but equally, and maybe more to point for the love of all things stop appointing yourself thread police!

But, but, but I've made myself a hat and a tabard

It doesn't matter... no one will read this!

If you don't have time to read a thread, then perhaps consider whether you need to post. Often, it probably doesn't matter if you post irrelevant, out of date, repetitive, poorly-nuanced, unnecessary drivel on the end of a long thread but it's worth remembering that sometimes people are describing, real or difficult situations and your crashing disregard for what has gone before can be, at best, insensitive and at worst, harmful. It's like barging into a room full of people and shouting your opinion across the space with no social graces or consideration.

But then I also have little truck with people bunging everything in AIBU because they're above using the topics available to them. It's a bear pit full of pomposity and lacking in critical thought (not this thread op!).

@ShowOfHands

If you don't have time to read a thread, then perhaps consider whether you need to post. Often, it probably doesn't matter if you post irrelevant, out of date, repetitive, poorly-nuanced, unnecessary drivel on the end of a long thread but it's worth remembering that sometimes people are describing, real or difficult situations and your crashing disregard for what has gone before can be, at best, insensitive and at worst, harmful. It's like barging into a room full of people and shouting your opinion across the space with no social graces or consideration.

But then I also have little truck with people bunging everything in AIBU because they're above using the topics available to them. It's a bear pit full of pomposity and lacking in critical thought (not this thread op!).

Great post 👏

I like your attitude, OP.

@ShowOfHands

If you don't have time to read a thread, then perhaps consider whether you need to post. Often, it probably doesn't matter if you post irrelevant, out of date, repetitive, poorly-nuanced, unnecessary drivel on the end of a long thread but it's worth remembering that sometimes people are describing, real or difficult situations and your crashing disregard for what has gone before can be, at best, insensitive and at worst, harmful. It's like barging into a room full of people and shouting your opinion across the space with no social graces or consideration.

But then I also have little truck with people bunging everything in AIBU because they're above using the topics available to them. It's a bear pit full of pomposity and lacking in critical thought (not this thread op!).

Brilliant post! 👍

Not being interested in what's been/being said on a long thread, plopping your opinion and moving on; it's like shouting out random crap in an empty room. You just look like a twat!

Do you really think that on a thread 10 + pages long there a chance that no one else has spewed out the same boring knee jerk reaction as you 100 times ?

I just don't see the point of bothering to speak when you've no time or interest to listen.

But, but, but I've made myself a hat and a tabard

Tin foil i hope?

Then I also have little truck with people bunging everything in AIBU

I think people post on aibu for traffic though. I post about my child's special needs on the special needs board. I typically get one or two responses and usually a handhold rather than someone with similar child.

I post on aibu and I get a much bigger response. Similar Sen parent advice as well as handholds. And when you're feeling very lonely because all the other mums had not babies and you're struggling it's nice to know people in volume are going through the same, but not necessarily hanging out on Sen.

Nt not not.

Thanks all, I feel totally vindicated as apparently the only arguments against it seem to be basically "I'm too important and wise for people not to hear my opinion" despite not having time to hear anyone else's.

Goantrooster - probably as I have very poor make and do skills. I might have to downgrade the tabard to a sash.

I always wonder what the people who do this are like in real life. The loud sort who just talk at you like a foghorn rather than to you? Those annoying as fuck people who think the whole world is just waiting with baited breath for their opinions even when it's something they know little about?

You can't help cross posts but I think its a tragedy when a person reaches adulthood not understanding the difference between a conversation and talking at someone.

[quote Everleigh2021]@EarringsandLipstick nah you're alright ta.....i'll do it my own way

always have, always will. soz an all[/quote]
What do you know - sometimes one post actually DOES tell you all you need to know.

@Peachesarepeach

Yeah I find it odd that people can't even be bothered to scan the thread (including the ops posts) and take a general sense check, but still think their point is so invaluable THAT.THEY.MUST.COMMENT. But they must expect someone to bother reading their posts otherwise why bother making them?

However this thread has made me laugh, and I totally deserved all the duplicating piss-takes!

Completely agree. Do these people genuinely never consider that, if they find it oh so boring and time-consuming to read actual responses before they share their absolutely vital viewpoint, many others will see their post as just one more to scroll past?

why should anyone have to plough through loads of messages before giving an opinion

How can you not realise your opinion will be yet another one to ‘plough through’?

Unfortunately you can't make MN posters use this forum as you would like them to.

If they only read the OP of really long thread, and make a comment that's either been said over and over or completely inappropriate because things have moved on then they'll look daft. But that's on them.

If I come across a really long thread I just assume everything's been said, and don't read or comment.

I find it easier on the website rather than the app, I can't seem to filter the OP post's on the app, whereas on the website it's easy to click and see all they have posted. If it's a thread with 100's of comments I will read the beginning and the end posts but miss the middle.

Oh god I had this months ago when I hit a low spot with a newborn in lockdown. I was explaining it was quite lonely and I didn’t get to spend much time with DH due to going to bed with ds at around 830, so the days dragged.

I clarified on page one that I didn’t have a problem going to bed early as I was tired but twenty pages later I was still getting and and ‘put a monitor on’ (even though poor ds was weeks old) - argghh.

No. I reply to the opening post. I don’t read 560 comments first ...