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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not served alcohol with a meal.

336 replies

GingerFreaker · 25/05/2021 17:57

I'm slightly miffed today.

We went out to lunch. We being grandparents, myself and 19 year old grandson. We booked a table. We ordered a bottle of wine with our meal. They refused to give the strapping 19 year old a glass, because of challenge 25, and the twit did not take his driving licence.

It stupidly "spoilt" a lovely long planned meet up.

Since we can legally buy a 16 year old alcohol with a meal, am I right to be annoyed it was refused today?

A pub chain, if it makes any difference.

OP posts:
4PawsGood · 25/05/2021 20:04

@RickiTarr

Do you know what “twit” means? Grin

He forgot to take it with him to the pub (for which his Gran charmingly calls him a twit hmm).

NewPapaGuinea · 25/05/2021 20:05

At first I thought the whole table was refused wine! If you can’t prove your age for alcohol then rightly they get refused. Not really sure how it would spoil the meal, just a bit annoying for the GS.

shouldistop · 25/05/2021 20:09

He started off as your grandson and ended up your son. Which is it?

*We've often been there before and it's never been an issue. It was family owned and has now been taken over by a chain.

We just used to say he was 16 / 17 / 18...Obviously different rules now*

Not different rules, the previous owners just weren't following licensing laws.

lucyslocketinherpocket · 25/05/2021 20:09

I bet you weren't as disappointed as me when I went for a long awaited cocktails and wine evening with my friends last weekend and got there only to be refused entry to a bar (not even service, entry!) because I had stupidly left my driving license which normally lives in my purse on DHs desk because he'd needed it to renew the car insurance! I'd had to provide my DOB as part of the track and trace thing too!

Reader, this is not a stealth boast. I am a 36 almost 37 year old knackered sahm of two small children who hasn't slept properly in five years. I do not for a millisecond look close to 25, let alone under 25!

That did make me cross. It was ridiculous and I had to ring DH (who luckily had invited his Dad round so could run out and leave the children in bed!) to run into town and bring me my driving license so that I could enter the premises and have a glass of wine with my friends!

But OP you are being a little UR I think. 19 is young, it's impossible to age someone that young and they can't just take your word for it. I don't see why they couldn't have served you though and him have a soft drink! I mean I take my children out for lunch with me and have a glass of wine, in theory that shouldn't be allowed either then.

My (57 year old) Dad was also been stopped in Tesco one week when he was going a full weekly shop (£200 odd worth) and had two bottles of £15 wine on there because he was with my younger brother when he was 21. He had ID, fine they wanted his too. He had to point out that it was very unlikely that he was going to be savouring a nice merlot. More like downing shots at the uni bar for £1 a go!! He wouldn't have minded if he'd have been buying bottles of WKD or similar. They did let that one slide (and it wasn't for my brother!).

hauntedcomputer · 25/05/2021 20:10

If the original post had been primarily about the server's overreaction and resultant embarrassment, you'd have received more sympathy. As it was, it seemed more that the problem was that a 19-year-old was refused alcohol, thereby "spoiling" everyone's day. That doesn't win sympathy.

Well, maybe he'll remember to bring his ID next time.

shouldistop · 25/05/2021 20:10

He doesn't drive yet has a drivers license that he forgot to take.

StealthPolarBear · 25/05/2021 20:13

@pigsDOfly

We just used to say he was 16/17/18

Well the previous owners were wrong to accept your word for his age.

The law is that if someone looks under 25 then they must be ID.

Serving people under the legal drinking age can result in the loss of the licence for the pup and/or the manager.

And the waitress would have probably lost her job if she was seen to be serving someone without IDing them if they didn't look over 25.

You are being massively unreasonable to expect otherwise.

Maybe at 19 he should be aware that if he wants to drink alcohol he needs to carry ID with him so he doesn't cause a meal to be 'spoilt'.

Surely the law is that it is illegal to serve alcohol to someone under 18 (16 with a meal) and challenge 25 is a best practice guideline? I refuse to believe it is illegal not to ID an 18 year old.
Floralnomad · 25/05/2021 20:14

I really don’t believe that the waitress started shouting as any normal people at that point would have got up and gone somewhere else for lunch . I also think that if you were stupid enough to stay that you would have put that point in the original post as surely the meal was ruined by the waitress shouting and making a scene , not the fact that your 19 yo ( with no ID ) can’t drink wine .

SchadenfreudePersonified · 25/05/2021 20:18

This reply has been deleted

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SchadenfreudePersonified · 25/05/2021 20:25

*glasses, not lasses

Removing lasses would be a bridge too far

RevolutionRadio · 25/05/2021 20:29

It's not just the pub that gets fined if caught selling alcohol to those under age but also the individual member of staff.

If he only goes to the pub with you why don't you keep his ID in your purse.

StealthPolarBear · 25/05/2021 20:37

So can anyone clarify because there appears to be a lot of misinformation on this thread.
Is it illegal to serve alcohol to under 18s
Or
Is it illegal to serve alcohol to those age 18-24 without asking for ID

Inastatus · 25/05/2021 20:41

@SchadenfreudePersonified - aren’t you a charmer 😂 I bet the OP doesn’t give a flying fuck whether you believe her or not!

LH1987 · 25/05/2021 20:42

@lucyslocketinherpocket, I bet you were secretly delighted, I would be!

Mummywantsaweewee · 25/05/2021 20:43

I used to work selling alcohol. @GingerFreaker you should know that the person who sells/serves the alcohol can receive a £5000 fine and a criminal record if they serve someone who is underage, possibly worse if the drinker ends up injured or worse because they’re intoxicated underage and the police do send teens in for test sales. Don’t take it personally, if it ruined the meal that’s your issue not the servers.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 25/05/2021 20:45

@StealthPolarBear

So can anyone clarify because there appears to be a lot of misinformation on this thread. Is it illegal to serve alcohol to under 18s Or Is it illegal to serve alcohol to those age 18-24 without asking for ID
AS far as I am aware, neither,

BUT

Only certain alcoholic drinks can legally be served to minors between 16 18, and then fly as part of a meal. (And must be bought by an adult - a child can't order a pint to go with his turkey twizzlers.)

It is just as legal to serve any alcohol to adults aged between 18 - 24 as to those over 24, but for their own protection a lot of places demand ID from customers who look under 25. If you have ID, you can have your drink.

AND - even if you are obviously over 25 (or even 50) the pub landlord has the right to refuse service. S/he doesn't have to give a reason, they can just sat "No".

Inastatus · 25/05/2021 20:45

@StealthPolarBear - I’ve just copied and pasted this from Gov.uk website:

If you’re under 18, it’s against the law:

for someone to sell you alcohol
to buy or try to buy alcohol
for an adult to buy or try to buy alcohol for you
to drink alcohol in licensed premises (such as a pub or restaurant)
However, if you’re 16 or 17 and accompanied by an adult, you can drink (but not buy) beer, wine or cider with a meal.

Wrenna · 25/05/2021 20:46

You sound like my MIL (a alcoholic).

BiBabbles · 25/05/2021 20:46

StealthPolarBear It's a mix of legality around who can be served and the Rule 25 which is meant to help enforce the legality and means staff members and establishments can get into trouble for not following it. They send in mystery shoppings and similar to try to catch people out.

I suppose they don't get NI cards any more?

Nope it's a letter now. I got my DS1 a local age-check card and then a provisional when the age-check card turned out to be less universally accepted than we were led to believe. Both live in his wallet in his waist bag that I've had to habituate for him to take out to make sure he has it.

I know I've been caught out for OTC painkillers and other things that it slips my mind that ID can be required for, so it seems a good habit to get him into.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 25/05/2021 20:46

[quote Inastatus]@SchadenfreudePersonified - aren’t you a charmer 😂 I bet the OP doesn’t give a flying fuck whether you believe her or not![/quote]
I'm sure she doesn't - she doesn't seem to give one bout anybody's opinion except her own.

Happily, I don't give one about whether you find me charming or not, so we're all OK.

Mummywantsaweewee · 25/05/2021 20:47

@StealthPolarBear it’s illegal to serve alcohol to anyone under 18. I was also trained not to serve alcohol if I knew it was being bought on behalf of someone underage.
Think 25 (used to be Think 21) is to protect the worker selling alcohol and isn’t the law. If they look over 25 there’s a damn good chance they are over 18. If they look under 25 then it’s best to ask for ID to be on the safe side. When it was think 21 it was so difficult to judge, especially with particularly hairy or tall young men, and young women were very good at making themselves look older with makeup.
I’ve ID’d people that I thought just about passed for 25 and been shocked that they only just turned 18.

StealthPolarBear · 25/05/2021 20:50

Exactly. Some people seem confused. It is not illegal to serve alcohol to an 18 year old, with or without id

Inastatus · 25/05/2021 20:53

@SchadenfreudePersonified - she doesn’t come across like that at all. Your user name is very apt! All ok 👍

Anonymous48 · 25/05/2021 20:54

He didn't have ID with him and at 19 I assume he looks like he could potentially be underage. What did you expect?

Chanjer · 25/05/2021 20:59

OP even put spoilt in quotation marks and people are still going OMFG CANTUHAVEAGOODTIMEWITHOUTBOOZE

Jesus Christ people take a fucking breath Grin

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