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Original poster

Is three bottles of wine a week too much?

451 replies

PinkOrchidDream · 23/05/2021 16:12

My husband, not me. Since I've been pregnant, so abstaining from drink altogether, I've been more aware of his drinking. It's by no means a problem judging by his behaviour but I just wondered if this is (obviously a bit unhealthy) but normal for some. It's spread out over the week so he doesn't binge at weekends.

OP posts:
Cowbells · 24/05/2021 09:14

I respect Nutt but he's grossly exaggerating over this in order to pursue a very different agenda of his own regarding rules on mind-altering substances.

There are many known benefits of small amounts of wine. It relaxes us (good thing. Red wine has anti oxidants (good thing.) One glass a year is nonsense. Maybe one small glass a day or every other day. It doesn't poison us.

ohnoohnoohnononononoo · 24/05/2021 09:14

@sadperson16

What is the point of piling on here and berating people who drink? Most who do,know the pitfalls. The stuff is marketed and pushed at us.Look at Motherland as an example, wine as some sort of Mummy rebellion. Times are hard,people reach for a cheap legal fix. Nagging is counterproductive.
People clearly don't know the pitfalls. Read the ignorance
sandgrown · 24/05/2021 09:15

It seems a lot and could do easily escalate. My ex said he was not an alcoholic as he didn’t drink during the day . He regularly drank 3 bottles in a night .

Horehound · 24/05/2021 09:17

I think it's quite a lot and I love wine. If it doesn't affect him that's probably a tell tale sign his body is adjusted to it.
Prob not great long term..

ohnoohnoohnononononoo · 24/05/2021 09:18

@Cowbells

I respect Nutt but he's grossly exaggerating over this in order to pursue a very different agenda of his own regarding rules on mind-altering substances.

There are many known benefits of small amounts of wine. It relaxes us (good thing. Red wine has anti oxidants (good thing.) One glass a year is nonsense. Maybe one small glass a day or every other day. It doesn't poison us.

You can relax in myriad ways. You don't have to chemically alter your mind.

You can eat blueberries and red grapes for antioxidants.

sadperson16 · 24/05/2021 09:21

Ah well,carry on preaching @ohnoohnoohnononononoo.

BadMotherLover · 24/05/2021 09:21

@BumCat

On mumsnet, yes! It’s an obscene amount! In life in general, no. Most wouldn’t bat an eyelid.
This.

3 bottles a week is half a bottle a day and one day off. Above the guidelines, yes. Is it unusual? No. I think it is very common. Many people would be under the drink drive limit after drinking that.

TheKeatingFive · 24/05/2021 09:23

You can eat blueberries and red grapes for antioxidants.

You can. Question is do you want to? Grin

Sammysquiz · 24/05/2021 09:26

OP - yes that is an unhealthy amount. It doesn’t make a difference if you get thousands of posters who all say they drink that amount, it still makes it an unhealthy amount.

Don’t understand the comparisons people are making with threads about food. There are loads of threads about people getting het up about sugar, carbs, fat etc. The main difference on here is people who drink too much tend to get far more defensive than someone who eats too much chocolate!

Horehound · 24/05/2021 09:26

The one person who sounds like an alcoholic on this thread is the one who says 2-3 bottles is fine, drinks everyday and knows loads of folk drinking the same volumes, and has "wine" in their username.. Grin
I don't think they can go a day without a drink....that is alcohol dependence. Sad they are defending drinking so thoroughly on here.

Cactusesi · 24/05/2021 09:33

As he is never drunk or ,I imagine, even tipsy, it certainly isn't enough to start nagging him about it.

His life would be healthier if he did not drink wine so often, but it would be healthier if he didn't sit on the couch so much, drive to the shops when he could walk, eat too many snacks, eat too much dinner, put sugar in his coffee, stay up late when he should be curled up in bed, get up irritatingly early to look after the baby, keep forgetting to go to the gym, watch the football rather than play it (or some safe sport).

sadperson16 · 24/05/2021 09:34

Last time,I looked adults were free to make choices.Slagging people off,accusing them of being alcoholics and acting superior,is unhelpful.

TheKeatingFive · 24/05/2021 09:37

I don't think they can go a day without a drink....that is alcohol dependence

How on earth would you know that?

ChequerBoard · 24/05/2021 09:40

I my house that would be a lot, yes.

Maybe suggest to him that he starts to cut down gradually ready for the baby being born? He won't be much help to you if he's half cut every night and wouldn't be able to drive if there was a medical emergency.

Horehound · 24/05/2021 09:41

@TheKeatingFive

I don't think they can go a day without a drink....that is alcohol dependence

How on earth would you know that?

Well they said "I try and just have a glass a night, i love it, i sometimes topple over to 2 !"

But you're right, I don't know...which is why I said "think".

TheKeatingFive · 24/05/2021 09:45

But you're right, I don't know.

Great, glad we’re on the same page.

Not exactly nice to say she ‘sounds like an alcoholic’ then, is it? Given that you don’t have any actual knowledge of whether she’s dependent on alcohol or not.

Horehound · 24/05/2021 09:47

It does sound like it. I don't care if it sounds nice or not! She doesn't care anyway, she is having her wine and enjoying it...good for her!

LolaSmiles · 24/05/2021 09:52

I think it's too much and not healthy, however I also think that there's a blind spot in society for excessive drinking as long as it's done in a particular way.
For example, it's fine for a professional in a good job to drink half a bottle to a bottle of wine a night because they've got a stressful job, they want to unwind, it's only a 2 or 3 (large) glasses, yes it's exceeding recommended levels but it's not that unusual, I drink a couple of glasses a night and feel fine, it's not like they're getting drunk, they're not binge drinking, it doesn't affect me, they're still up for work the next day etc and then there's the subtle idea that wine is a a respectable, nice drink unlike someone going home and drinking spirits every night.
If you strip it back it's "person uses alcohol as a crutch to unwind most days of the week", but as long as it's wine and they hold down a job we view it differently.

Poptart4 · 24/05/2021 09:55

This is MN so more than a thimble of wine once a year is too much Hmm

Personally I dont feel like 3 bottles spread out over a week is too much. Half a bottle of wine is 2 glasses. Would less be better probably but we all do things we probably shouldn't. Smoking, eating too much junk food, not enough exercise....

Life is meant to be enjoyed. I dont want to spend 70+ years being perfectly healthy just to die anyway.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 24/05/2021 10:03

It's a bit much.

Dsisproblem · 24/05/2021 10:24

It's too much for me! But I'm not him. I'd suggest he starts with 1 night off a week. I remember watching a liver doctor on tv talking about how the most important thing is to have a few nights off in a row to allow the liver to recover. I don't drink a huge amount, but I do try to remember to have a few nights off mid-week

BeenAsFarAsMercyAndGrand · 24/05/2021 10:38

There are frequently threads about obesity on MN, and plenty of people are willing to criticise the food choices of others, or failure to exercise. Similarly, smoking is pretty much universally frowned upon on MN. Alcohol is not uniquely singled out for criticism.

I don't make healthy choices 100% of the time. I exercise a lot, but I do occasionally eat junk (although I try to limit it). With alcohol, I aim to have at least 4 nights a week alcohol free, and I only have a glass or two on the nights I do drink. But I'd be lying if I said I kept to that number of alcohol free days every week without fail (on holiday I drink more, so there are c. 4-5 weeks a year where I definitely go over the 14 units by a fair bit). I know that's not optimally healthy, and I feel no need to pretend to myself that there is no link between alcohol intake and certain health conditions.

What is bizarre is not the fact that someone drinks more than 14 units a week, but the fact that they are so defensive about it. Just be honest with yourself - it isn't healthy, but you choose to do it anyway. Fine.

Mrbob · 24/05/2021 10:41

Personally I dont feel like 3 bottles spread out over a week is too much

And yet the government do feel it is. What are your qualifications?

BumCat · 24/05/2021 10:47

Whoa! I’m not saying it’s right. No need to be defensive. I’ve had issues myself in the past with drinking more alcohol than I personally thought was acceptable and have addressed those issues. But it does depend on your perspective, on mumsnet, as just proven, 3 bottles is a far too much. But in the world in general, particularly the UK at the moment, it is not deemed as such generally. Personally, if you can keep it to that I wouldn’t say you have a drinking problem, but maybe suggest trying to drop a bottle. That’s my perspective.

Alcohol consumption at the moment is a societal problem that needs to be addressed, but often on mumsnet there is another extreme view of (as someone jokingly posted on another thread) that anyone having anything over a thimble full of champagne at Christmas is an alcoholic.

BumCat · 24/05/2021 10:48

@Poptart4 ah! You got there before me. Grin