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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Eurovision

227 replies

Sometimeswinning · 22/05/2021 23:06

I dont know why I'm watching it! It needs to go really. How are we behind Israel? They're not even Europe!

OP posts:
AngeloMysterioso · 23/05/2021 01:08

No singer who gives a fuck about their career and not being made to look like a dick in front of half the world is going to go on Eurovision when it’s virtually guaranteed we’ll come bottom. Why would they?

RedToothBrush · 23/05/2021 01:08

Before that??

1990 "Give a Little Love Back to the World" Emma
1991 "A Message to Your Heart" Samantha Janus
1992 "One Step Out of Time" Michael Ball
1993 "Better the Devil You Know" Sonia
1994 "Lonely Symphony (We Will Be Free)" Frances Ruffelle
1995 "Love City Groove" Love City Groove
1996 "Ooh Aah...Just a Little Bit" Gina G
1997 "Love Shine a Light" Katrina and the Waves
1998 "Where Are You?" Imaani
1999 "Say It Again" Precious
2000 "Don't Play That Song Again" Nicki French
2001 "No Dream Impossible" Lindsay Dracass
2002 "Come Back" Jessica Garlick
2003 "Cry Baby" Jemini
2004 "Hold On to Our Love" James Fox
2005 "Touch My Fire" Javine
2006 "Teenage Life" Daz Sampson
2007 "Flying the Flag (For You)" Scooch
2008 "Even If" Andy Abraham
2009 "It's My Time" Jade Ewen

Yeah struggling with the majority of these...

Chimboo · 23/05/2021 01:10

@TheLovleyChebbyMcGee

Because everyone's hates the UK? Look at Amanda Holdens comment after saying 2 phrases in another language:

'I don't even know which is which'

It comes across as very ignorant!

Yes!!!! As soon as she said it I wanted to crawl in a hole and hide. Don’t be so bloody ignorant. The fact that she clearly would know “which is which” makes it all the more cringe. Get in the bin
CloverHilla · 23/05/2021 01:10

I'm Irish not British, but my heart did break for him a little with the nul points- however I did think James had a brilliant reaction and it was really appreciated by the crowd! Good man James!
Also thought the lead singer and at least one other member of the Italian band looked completely bored and couldn't care less if they won or not Confused

RedToothBrush · 23/05/2021 01:12

@AngeloMysterioso

No singer who gives a fuck about their career and not being made to look like a dick in front of half the world is going to go on Eurovision when it’s virtually guaranteed we’ll come bottom. Why would they?
Its not guarenteed!

The good songs on Eurovision ALWAYS float to the top of the voting. Without fail.

We just aren't putting up anything of that quality.

Its more that one wants to put up their star song up for Eurovision cos that means they might not have exclusive rights and royalties if they do. They want to save it for the title track of their own project....

RedToothBrush · 23/05/2021 01:14

Our artists are snobs who aren't passionate about eurovision or see it as a farce not an honour.

Fair play to James Newman in that respect, but he still moves like a sack of spuds.

Its a dance/performance/song contest. We don't get its a combo thing.

SwedishEdith · 23/05/2021 01:22

@OrangeSharked

UK used to do well until about 2000. We never placed in the bottom half of the leader board. 2002 was pretty much our last good year. (Wonder what happened in 2003 Grin)

I think its a combination of having no friends and also not very memorable songs. I think we are a bit behind the times with eurovision really, we are still in a 00s cheese rather than a 2020 cheese.

Blue came 5th in the public vote 10 years ago. We could do much better if we actually took it seriously. I knew this year's was shite as only heard it for the first time this week so didn't even consider we'd get any points. Poor lad but shite song and a forgettable look and performance. What can you expect with that?
Shehasadiamondinthesky · 23/05/2021 01:23

The song from Switzerland made my hair stand on end. Why didn't he win? He was brilliant.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 23/05/2021 01:25

I'm Irish not British, but my heart did break for him a little with the nul points- however I did think James had a brilliant reaction and it was really appreciated by the crowd! Good man James!

The song, performance and staging weren't great; but a large part of the vote - especially the public vote goes on, shall we say, 'other factors' too. Remember the near-pornographic Polish milkmaids that stormed it with the public vote.

As a 35yo, larger, average-looking man in awkward, non-revealing clothes, he was already at a big visual disadvantage to some of the other acts. I'm not saying that's all it goes on in any way, nor that some of the beautiful young women wearing next to nothing aren't also brilliant singers with excellent songs; but their looks and clothing choices clearly don't hurt their chances, going on many of the entries year on year.

On top of that, imho, having a lower voice automatically puts a singer at a disadvantage in such a large stadium, as it doesn't carry as well or distinctly as the female and higher-pitched male singers' voices do. Even Paul Robeson wouldn't have filled the arena with the same clarity and distinctiveness as the bloke from Portugal who sounded like Tina Turner this year.

PuffinBadger · 23/05/2021 01:27

I really like the idea of sending Vic Reeves to sing in the club style like someone suggested on the other thread. Could send Bob to prat around too. We'd still get 0 points but it would be more fun
www.google.com/search?q=vic+reeves+club+singer&oq=vic+reeves+&aqs=chrome.1.69i57j0i273j46j46i273j0.5490j1j7&client=ms-android-ee-uk-revc&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:31c9bc1e,vid:2prE-DUyESY,st:0

EsmaCannonball · 23/05/2021 01:29

I actually noticed the Italian guy doing the coke thing at the time but thought he was surreptitiously wiping his nose on the table in a kind of too-rock-'n'-roll-to-have-a-hankie way.

The UK's problem is that we are too busy trying to second-guess what will make Europe love us and, as a result, we always miss the zeitgeist. If something campy and fun wins we do something campy and fun the year a big ballad wins, then we do a big ballad the year something dancey wins, then we do something dancey the year something acoustic and folksy wins, and so on. I think we should be forced to qualify like the other countries. Not only would it be fairer but we'd also be forced to have a big rethink.

ResIpsaLoquiturInterAlia · 23/05/2021 01:29

I believe there has only been one break through international music act of paramount significance ticking all the necessary talent, enjoyment, catchiness boxes in recent years and that is of course…. PSY Gangnam Style (강남스타일) with over 4 billion views voting with their ears and eyes on Google YouTube:

m.youtube.com/watch?v=9bZkp7q19f0

RedToothBrush · 23/05/2021 01:30

The thing is i dont understand a word of french but France's performance was wonderful. It was beautiful simple staging, such emotion, she looked great, you could understand the sentiment if not the words, and the tune was good.

Iceland, in english. Unusual and quirky. Very catchy. Gimmicky dance and awesome keyboard trick which staged well. Unique selling point of 'the geek'.

Us: fat lad bumbling out of his comfort zone to a song thats ok but at best a throwaway bside that we've heard a similar a thousand times before. With some pointless trumpets that did fuck all.

Also compare with Mans and Heroes and the beautiful staging that complemented the song perfectly and Mans great intuitive acting.

The clue that James was going to bomb was the awful acting in Line of Eurovision earlier in the week...

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 23/05/2021 01:38

Why was Amanda Holden chosen, anyway? Many of the countries send their past winners/entrants, people connected with Eurovision broadcasting who would be known backstage or, at least, people who appear to want the job and show a bit of joy and enthusiasm.

Yes, I know that, by that time, the votes are all already in for the current year; but I think it's all the ongoing image that a country portrays, and it's all noticed.

It would have been one thing if it had been, say, Swedish and Norwegian, and she'd apologetically said she hoped she'd got them the right way around; but two such differently-sounding languages as French and Dutch, for goodness' sake, and then to brush it off as if the 'silly' Europeans are to blame for having different languages in the first place was extremely rude.

They're already doing the entire show in our language - a foreign language to them - so making crass comments about a couple of two or three word greetings is just really awful.

EmphaticPeriod · 23/05/2021 01:42

Did not think James deserved nil points personally.
As to our entries above, I loved Blue's I can, but Lee Ryan was poorly and hit a bum note on the night. Still did okay all round though.
I also liked Electro Velvet (I was in the minority) but not sure their lighting up suits worked 100% on the night. Loved Surie especially with the stage invasion - she was awesome. The rest - other than Ozzie Gina G and American Katrina Wink I can't remember, apart from Scooch for all the wrong reasons Grin.

The UK public vote was as follows:
12 - Lithuania (yellow discotheque dancers - we like camp/tongue-in-cheek. well, I do as I voted for this 3x)
10 - Iceland (profiting from being robbed last year)
8 - Bulgaria (Billy Eyelash fans?/backstory)
7 - Finland (Linkin Park fans?)
6 - Malta (Lizzo fans)
5 France (Piaf fans)
4 Ukraine (songs that speed up?!)
3 Italy (the other metalheads that didn't vote for Finland)
2 Norway (tourettes/facial ticks backstory)
1 Switzerland (my vote! Wink)

I'd be bereft if we no longer showed Eurovision. Love it. Not sure I agree with the judges having 50% of the say (for us Nikki Chapan et al) but still love the show. Besides, Steps volunteered (or H volunteered them) to step up next year. What's not to like?!

Judges vote on our behalf was
12 France
10 Iceland
8 Switzerland
7 Portugal
6 Israel
5 Bulgaria
4 Finland
3 San Marino
2 Spain
1 Belgium

rosamacrose · 23/05/2021 01:43

Graham Norton always makes it make sense, though.
For me, anyway

RedToothBrush · 23/05/2021 01:52

The thing with the voting is outside the top 12 - 18 the Uk will always bomb as we are culturally most different in music taste / culture / language.

If we get a song into the left hand side of the board, we will be placed much more 'fairly'.

But if we aren't good enough to make the top 12 - 18,what does it matter if we are 19th or 26th? And get 23 or 0 points in the process.

It only matters if you are top 5.

BluePeterVag · 23/05/2021 01:52

Count Binface needs to be there for 2022. We should field a really shit song, not just our usual stuff, but something genuinely shit, and bring on Rick Astley to Rick Roll them. Fuckers.

EmphaticPeriod · 23/05/2021 01:59

Irish vote
Public Jury
12 Lithuania France
10 Iceland Malta
8 Ukraine Iceland
7 France Norway
6 Italy Ukraine
5 Finland Switzerland
4 Malta Lithuania
3 Switzerland Belgium
2 Portugal Azerbaijan
1 Sweden Bulgaria

EmphaticPeriod · 23/05/2021 02:06

German public also awarded Lithuania 12 points Grin

earthyfire · 23/05/2021 02:11

We were also sure Ireland would at least give us a point! Grin

mathanxiety · 23/05/2021 03:08

The truth is the UK song was dire and James Newman could neither move nor sing. And what was with those giant trumpets?

Also, you can't on the one hand complain about political voting and then whine about Ireland not even giving you one point.

DioneTheDiabolist · 23/05/2021 03:14

But Eurovision has never been about musical masterpieces. People have won with worse songs.

The song may have been ok, but the singer was breathless, couldn't hit some notes and was occasionally flat. As soon as he started, I thought of Jemini.

ResIpsaLoquiturInterAlia · 23/05/2021 03:17

I think the real question is yes the British entry was not great but is it deserving a big fat zero like no other? Surely relatively some of the other entries (in the finals) must have been as bad if not worst and would a proven popular talent like Adele still score no points to suggest/confirm that this is a closed shop with scoring determined by non musical factors making a political statement.

mathanxiety · 23/05/2021 03:21

But Eurovision has never been about musical masterpieces.
Fair enough, but plenty of pretty good songs have won, and this year's UK offering didn't hold a candle to any of them.

People have won with worse songs.
Give us one example apart from Diggy Loo Diggy Lay.

And please remember that the UK isn't up against past winners who sucked in any given year. You have to beat the current field.