Husband booked a holiday,I don't want to do,aibu?

[breadbreadwine]

My husband has booked a holiday for the half term.
I thought fab,just what we need...till he told me he has bought a 6 man tent and we are going away to Scotland for a week in a tent.
He's booked a parkdene tent holiday.
It was £155 for 4 of us and he has paid £700 for a tent.
He has bought sleeping bags,fridge etc
He said it's to save money.

Aibu here ?
A week in a tent in Scotland with 2 kids who don't sleep anyway.
I'm not high maintenance but I'm worried about the toilet /shower situation

I'm not happy

@G5000

Just wondering, which parent will be doing the cooking and washing up and sorting all the wet clothes and taking DC to toilet in the middle of the night and entertaining them when they wake up at 5AM and it's pouring down? And which one will take them for ice cream, claim the best parent badge and declare that see, best holiday ever!

Take a guess. Who's doing all the legwork now?

To me, the details or specifics or camping aren't the issue. The fact that he makes such plans without consulting you is the issue

Camping is a niche like but I agree with this too.

I'm a Scot of irish descent with red hair and very pale freckly skin who burns very very easily, suffers from prickly heat and my asthma flares up in humid places - if a partner or spouse booked me a holiday in say... Malaysia or New Orleans in the height of summer i would not thank them. Because while those places and that type of holiday may appeal to others it's my idea of hell and would be likely to impact me badly health wise.

Holidays are generally one of the more major purchases we make and shouldn't be made for others without consulting them I don't think

That you keep going along with his ill thought out selfish plans op is ludicrous. Is that really how you want to live your and dcs lives?

As I said in earlier post he is supremely selfish. I could not be with someone like that.

He hasn't even considered how this might suit/not suit the dc.

I have a dd - now 20 - who also loves camping but who also would not appreciate this being sprung on her because for health reasons she can only manage it in certain seasons/places.

He is clearly just unbelievably entitled and selfish and you seem resigned to picking up the pieces of his messes. So there are no consequences for him - was he raised like this too? It really doesn't bode well for happy family/marriage I agree

@Livelovebehappy

Would be my idea of hell. I don’t like Scotland, and dislike camping.

What? Do you know how diverse the landscape and activities are in Scotland?

That's like saying you hate the USA because Times Square is too busy for your taste

The children will probably eat like horses, and sleep like the dead. (please excuse the terminology !)
It won't rain all the time, the midges won't be out yet,
Nothing like bacon sandwiches when you're camping.
You might end up loving it.

100% what Graphista says. DH and DD love camping. They love all sorts, wild camping, sites with nice shower/toilet blocks (private cubicles), more obscure sites without much there, they've even hired a camping van. They have the cheap Tesco tent, a Vango, another backpacking tent and gear that's probably worth about £3k in total, and that's just the camping.

It's DS's and my idea of hell. Similarly, DS and I love historical sites. That's DD's and DH's idea of hell.

So because we all love each other and have consideration for each other and are not selfish pricks, we'd never spring somethign like this and expect the others to do it or be grateful for it.

Do a dry run at home in the garden. Go & have fun with your kiddies

It is rather odd to say "I don't like Scotland"

I'm a Scot and I don't like certain PARTS of Scotland but to say you dislike the entire country is bizarre!

It has countryside, highlands, coast, even the towns and cities vary greatly in size, atmosphere and culture - just like other countries.

I'm on the coast now in a semi rural area that I'm really not enjoying living in (complicated family circs) but originally from glasgow which I love and hope to return to living there and have always loved visiting as it's so vibrant and friendly and tons going on to see and do.

I've visited various other parts as a tourist inc camping and the scenery is breathtaking.

I have friends and family that live right up north VERY rurally which they love, I don't mind visiting there to unwind but I really couldn't live there way too boring.

But to dismiss a whole country is weird

It's currently 6 degrees here.

As for 'Get him to set it up in the garden first', a) not everyone has a garden and b) he won't.

My husband did something similar OP booked a holiday for half term without consulting me with his parents going along as well. You have my sympathy. I’m not going, I can’t take another week with the judgemental inlaws. I’ve booked a couple of days off so I’ll do something’s I want to do. I’m over him deciding everything and expecting me to just tag along. Sounds like you are in a similar situation OP.

Oh bless you. He should have checked with you. You couldnt had a week at Butlins in Minehead for a lot less! But try it and see how it goes. Make sure you have plenty wine to drink yourself into oblivion every night. It may not be freezing. But I have tried camping and its not my thing. We have camper and even two nights in that is enough for me. You could always try and find a B n B if it rains......kids usually love camping so maybe it will be ok.....fresh air might make em sleep better......let us know how you get on.

He arranged it without asking you so he can go on it without you!

Wave them all off and have a relaxing time at home.

That’s what I’d do if DH ever books a camping trip. I don’t do camping, he knows it.

I wouldn’t stop him going with the children though
^
This Totally agree, don't go

frazzledasarock

Wave them all off and have a relaxing time at home.

That’s what I’d do if DH ever books a camping trip. I don’t do camping, he knows it.

I wouldn’t stop him going with the children though
^
This - I totally agree. I would hate camping, I like a comfortable bed. Be careful that the children don't get to like it, could be become a habit unless you manage to sell the tent and declare it has got lost in the garage, maybe rope in a trusted friend to advertise it! He went behind your back, cheeky git

£700 on a second hand TENT?

"Morrisons in Dumfries will be a cheap option"

bet you can't wait OP.

Honestly people, stop filling up this thread. We need space for OP to let us know how she's getting on!

We r staying in Parkdean resort at the moment, the entertainment is rubbish due to CV19 everyone has to stay seated. If children run around you get asked to leave. Pool has to be pre booked and you get only 30 minutes and have to go pool ready there is no changing rooms ect. - don't go !

I'm not a
Camper bit expect you will need good warm sleeping bags, blow up beds, pump, camping chairs, light/torches, stove and kettle, cups, washing up bowl

Hopefully you won't be cooking though: id
Hate that

So many things to buy and take

Oh wine: gallons of wine to help with sleep

My husband did the EXACT same thing. Only he bought 2 tents on credit equalling £1400. Also had to pay £200 in transport as neither of us drive and then around £500 in equipment. Also between us 7 children, 2 with autism. Over my birthday. All this knowing I don’t like camping. He promised me he would take us to a restaurant for my birthday meal - but didn’t book it or check there was anything I could eat on the menu (I’m gluten free) had promised the kids there would be birthday cake but forgot that too.

We are in the process of a divorce.

We are in the process of a divorce.
Good for you.

Sorry OP I know you’ve decided to go but I think you’re setting a precedent now. Not only will he continue booking things eithout your consent knowing you’ll cave in but you’ve also just given up ever staying in a hotel. Camping is now your holidays.

@Petlover9

frazzledasarock

Wave them all off and have a relaxing time at home.

That’s what I’d do if DH ever books a camping trip. I don’t do camping, he knows it.

I wouldn’t stop him going with the children though
^
This - I totally agree. I would hate camping, I like a comfortable bed. Be careful that the children don't get to like it, could be become a habit unless you manage to sell the tent and declare it has got lost in the garage, maybe rope in a trusted friend to advertise it! He went behind your back, cheeky git

Oh be careful your kids don't have a fun filled childhood.

Jesus Christ... that is a pathetic comment.

Why do people suggest tons of booze or getting drunk? You'll have to go to the loo, you'll have a hangover with the kids up with the larks (dawn is a little before 5 up here now), he'll be expecting the OP to do all the work and she's supposed to do it with 'tons of booze'?

Yes I was just typing the same thing. Only thing more miserable than camping with kids in cold wet weather is camping with kids in cold wet weather with a raging hangover.

@G5000

Yes I was just typing the same thing. Only thing more miserable than camping with kids in cold wet weather is camping with kids in cold wet weather with a raging hangover.

The noise in those places, too (because the kids all get up at dawn, motors starting, dogs barking, etc etc) and you're in a bloody tent with no toilet having to get out on wet grass and cook.

Yes it’s very annoying he’s booked it without discussing! Pretty awful really! Having said that, don’t knock it till you tried it. You might have a really fun week. And don’t be too negative in front of your children, if they get all excited about sleeping under canvas and swimming every day and making smores and things, they will have more fun and so will be much easier for you. Nothing worse than sharing a tent with whiny children. I would just suck it up, go, try and have fun, and come to an agreement where next holiday you choose and book it.