To think my ds isnt overweight due to diet

[Hannahgirl]

2nd post within a day !!
Hi my son 5 has severe asd and hes literally on the go all the time he never sits still for a sec. He never eats breakfast lunch or dinner. His snacks tend to be fruit or a sandwich etc. Hes overweight by 2 stone.
He is a very tall boy. Aibu

And my six year old is also 91st centile for height.

He honestly doesn't look fat.

an average six year old weighs about three stone.

If he's two stone overweight. Then he's five stone and clearly incredibly overweight.

The only thing that you can do is write down exactly everything he ears, weighing if possible.

And let the doctors do investigations

[quote CandyLeBonBon]@EmeraldShamrock eating fat doesn't make you overweight! [/quote]
Not per se, but foods that are high in fat like cheese and oil are also high in calories, ergo it’s easy to gain weight if you are eating a lot of them. I stopped cooking with oil too other than roast potatoes because it just adds calories for no discernible benefit and it’s so easy to pour too much into the pan by accident.

OP, Do you keep food in the car? Does any other family member feed him, out of concern, and not tell you? Who does he spend time with?
Does he drink sugary drinks or fruit juice? Or milkshakes?

Check again with the school. I doubt he goes 6 hours without anything except water.

If he's snacking, then limit him to three snacks a day to replace the three meals. It's very easy to lose track if he eats at other times.

I would suggest an easy way to help keep a food diary for him would be to separate out what you will be giving him for food and drinks each day into a basket in the fridge and keep a list of it to licking of each time he eats an item. If he doesn't finish it Chuck it in a ziplock bag in the basket. At the end of each day when he's in bed make an exact note of what he's eaten on the diary. We had to do this with my diabetics as when he started getting dementia so we could monitor what he was eating and it works really well. You and DH as the food providers should be the only one to access any sort of food for him and it must come from the basket.

Makes it so so much easier to keep track. Good luck

Oh and you should do the basket in the fridge for a couple of weeks to give a true representative food diary for the DRs

Children need healthy fats to grow properly.
Everything in moderation and balance.
Are you questioning that fact that they’re overweight or the reasons for why they are.
It should be very easy for you to work out if your child is overweight if you don’t agree with the doctor.
Weigh them and compare it to the healthy weight range for his age and size.

I think that you need to take a step back. This is a health issue that needs addressing. It's so easy to get defensive or be in denial about weight. It's a very sensitive subject.

Treat it like any other issue. Be honest. Keep records. He is 2 stone overweight. You need to see it for the health concern it is and deal with it as you would any other health problem.

Remove yourself from it (eg feeling criticised, judged, defensive etc) and make it purely about his needs.

I know how hard it can be btw. My children are both autistic and we've had every kind of food issue going!

The Drs need to see what he is eating. A food diary on kitchen side works then log as you feed him its easy to forget about things otherwise. Homebargains or amazon sell ones for dieting ( I know he isn't but I use one for losing weight) Photos and measurements can help too. You might have written glass of milk and he is having a huge one etc.

So if he doesn't eat a lot and you don't have any scales in the house and you don't think he looks fat, what on earth set you on this path and made you think he's overweight.

Have you calculated his bmi as that will take into account his height

If you try to calculate bmi for kids they ask their age and then rather than apply just the height weight ratio they also take into consideration the average for the age.

How tall is he op? My son is overweight by the kids bmi calculator for his age as he's 8. But he's 5ft and wearing 12-13yo clothes. So if I put in his weight and height but say his age is 12 he's just right. Its not the best tool to judge tall children and HVs don't apply much critical thinking ime.

Do the food diary and let the doctors assess why he is overweight. There is not much point asking us.

Very odd.

I appreciate he has autism, but is this any reason why he can't be taught to sit at meals and eat with you, as a family? This is a life skill that needs teaching and encouraging.

A child of 5 and one with autism can't regulate their own food intake so you need to do it and create a sensible routine.

If he has food issues then you need professional help around those (ie a fussy eater.)

You need to keep a food diary. I suspect he eats far more than you're saying. If his diet is mainly processed snack foods then the calories will add up quickly.

I appreciate he has autism, but is this any reason why he can't be taught to sit at meals and eat with you, as a family? This is a life skill that needs teaching and encouraging.

Goodness

It's a bit laughable so many posters are asking if he IS overweight and asking for his height etc.

Medical professionals have already done this and the OP is being told he is overweight.

No HCP is going to say a child is overweight if they have not done the maths and worked out his BMI/ percentile.

@flashylamp

I appreciate he has autism, but is this any reason why he can't be taught to sit at meals and eat with you, as a family? This is a life skill that needs teaching and encouraging.

Goodness

And? I spent my career working with families whose children had ASD. Did you?

Ive asked my dh to pick up scales if he can as all this is strange. He wears 6-7 yrs clothes

No HCP is going to say a child is overweight if they have not done the maths and worked out his BMI/ percentile.

Actually loads do. they have a chart and it compares age against age. its not calculated like adult BMI. So my son is the height of a 12 yo but he's 8. A HV will weigh him. do the calculation and tell me he's overweight. But anyone with critical thinking and eyes can see he isn't. If the HV put his age down as 12 he would be in the correct weight range. Its not just a height/weight calculation. These tools are rubbish for very tall or short children because they are compared against the average child of that age rather than other children of the same height regardless of age.

You are being unreasonable.

Your son is overweight due to his diet .

And? I spent my career working with families whose children had ASD. Did you?

Yet here you are displaying a shocking lack of knowledge and understanding surrounding autistic children

@Hannahgirl

Ive asked my dh to pick up scales if he can as all this is strange. He wears 6-7 yrs clothes

when you were told he was overweight, how did the meeting go? Was your son weighed and his height measures?

One poster picked me up on suggesting he had more structured meal times. I appreciate this is really hard, but might it help you to take control over what he's eating and when, a bit more compared to constant snacking?

At school, does he have a TA who helps him at lunchtime? How does it work there? Does he have packed lunches or school dinners? Is he in mainstream school?

Definitely worth weighing & measuring him yourself so you can look at what his BMI is. Borrow a scale if you don’t want one in the house.

Not all GPs are super well trained in peds issues. I was told by one that DD needing supplemental bottle feeding in the middle of the night because she only gained a little weight one week (despite having moved from being born in 4th percentile to 65th at 10 weeks). Health visitor and pediatrician just laughed and said, that’s insane, don’t do that!

@flashylamp Please explain your own qualifications and experience. You seem to know better.