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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

New neighbour, terraced house, seems to expect silence

779 replies

Bahhhhhumbug · 19/05/2021 01:34

New neighbour to my empty (atm) terraced property. As soon as moved in started sending me texts (got my number by asking previous neighbour she bought house off but that's a whole other thread) informing me there seems be a tv left on in the property.
She said l hope l didn't mind her texting me and she askedfor my number.
I texted prev. neighbours and queried whether their buyer knew my house was empty and she said yes as she had told her.
I have always got on very well with former neighbour so didn't 'pull her up' on giving out my number as was very out of character and just figured she got caught on the hop in what was a very stressful house move for unconnected reasons to this tale.
So l text back to new neighbour that yes l was aware and it was a radio left on a talking channel as the house was empty but thanks for letting me know.
Next day l get a phone call from her and she's all 'Hi (insert very shortened version of my name, which even the old neighbour never called me) and she tells me again the radio has been on all night (it hasn't its on a timer goes off about 11pm and a lamp comes on) because she ' can hear it ' l was l admit a little frosty with her as l was annoyed at these chummy texts and calls from someone who shouldn't even have my number and shouldn't have even asked for it imo though l accept old neighbour partly to blame.
I had to read between the lines at this point that she found it too loud so l said (without being asked) l would call next day, (which l did) and turn it down and move it to the far wall in the kitchen (no neighbours that side).
I've had another long text off her today after ld done all that saying can l please answer and confirm that l am going to turn it down (she wasnt in when l went round and obliged so obviously at this point didn't know l had already done so
) Whilst there l also checked upstairs l couldn't hear it wafting up the stairs which l couldn't whatsoever and l have good hearing. It is quieter than a normal volume speaking voice and you can only hear it after you've gone two doors into the house, it's about a volume 3 on Alexa equivalent.
Old neighbour when asked said couldn't hear it when l was in there and neither could l.
Shes rang me twice again now and l just ignored her in the hope she will text me and tell me what the fucks wrong now. She did then text saying she wants it switching off as she can still hear it.
She keeps bringing up that she works from home and l get impression she seems to think that means should be almost silence from neighbouring properties. Or maybe because the vendors told her my house was empty she had an expectation of it being completely silent.
If people moved in they would be entitled to watch tv, talk, have radio on etc and all at a higher wolume than one quiet radio. WWYD as she is really getting on my nerves now.
If l was a rude person l might suggest she should've bought a detached house maybe, but lm not.

Subject:
New neighbour, terraced house, seems to expect silence

Message:
New neighbour to my empty (atm) terraced property. As soon as moved in started sending me texts (got my number by asking previous neighbour she bought house off but that's a whole other thread) informing me there seems be a tv left on in the property.
She said l hope l didn't mind her texting me and she askedfor my number.
I texted prev. neighbours and queried whether their buyer knew my house was empty and she said yes as she had told her.
I have always got on very well with former neighbour so didn't 'pull her up' on giving out my number as was very out of character and just figured she got caught on the hop in what was a very stressful house move for unconnected reasons to this tale.
So l text back to new neighbour that yes l was aware and it was a radio left on a talking channel as the house was empty but thanks for letting me know.
Next day l get a phone call from her and she's all 'Hi (insert very shortened version of my name, which even the old neighbour never called me) and she tells me again the radio has been on all night (it hasn't its on a timer goes off about 11pm and a lamp comes on) because she ' can hear it ' l was l admit a little frosty with her as l was annoyed at these chummy texts and calls from someone who shouldn't even have my number and shouldn't have even asked for it imo though l accept old neighbour partly to blame.
I had to read between the lines at this point that she found it too loud so l said (without being asked) l would call next day, (which l did) and turn it down and move it to the far wall in the kitchen (no neighbours that side).
I've had another long text off her today after ld done all that saying can l please answer and confirm that l am going to turn it down (she wasnt in when l went round and obliged so obviously at this point didn't know l had already done so
) Whilst there l also checked upstairs l couldn't hear it wafting up the stairs which l couldn't whatsoever and l have good hearing. It is quieter than a normal volume speaking voice and you can only hear it after you've gone two doors into the house, it's about a volume 3 on Alexa equivalent.
Old neighbour when asked said couldn't hear it when l was in there and neither could l.
Shes rang me twice again now and l just ignored her in the hope she will text me and tell me what the fucks wrong now. She did then text saying she wants it switching off as she can still hear it.
She keeps bringing up that she works from home and l get impression she seems to think that means should be almost silence from neighbouring properties. Or maybe because the vendors told her my house was empty she had an expectation of it being completely silent.
If people moved in they would be entitled to watch tv, talk, have radio on etc and all at a higher wolume than one quiet radio. WWYD as she is really getting on my nerves now.
If l was a rude person l might suggest she should've bought a detached house maybe, but lm not.

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OP posts:
littlepattilou · 20/05/2021 14:16

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SakuraEdenSwan1 · 20/05/2021 14:17

@Quaggars nothing unreasonable at all, only on MNet do you all get perpetually offended at literally anything, then all pile on just for the sake of it.

littlepattilou · 20/05/2021 14:21

@MLMsuperfan

If your neighbour applies for a noise abatement notice they'll likely get it because it's not reasonable to deliberately make noise from an empty property that is designed to be heard from outside. In fact if I was them I would get one now, because it will be a slam dunk.

@SakuraEdenSwan1

I think not when Police advice is to do this.

Don't be so ridiculous. Hmm

Yeah, police do occasionally advise people leave a radio on for a few hours if they're out for the evening. They do NOT advise people to leave the radio on all bloody day, and every day, when the property is completely unoccupied. Hmm

You would have to be some kind of inconsiderate, entitled muppet to do that! Leaving it for hours and HOURS every day, (when the house is unoccupied,) so the next door neighbour can hear it CONSTANTLY! It's a bloody noise nuisance, and disgustingly rude.

As I said, I hope the woman next door tells everyone about it, and it gets out that the property is empty...... Wink How deliciously ironic that would be!

BaileysforBreakfast · 20/05/2021 14:22

It is interesting that so many of the posters who think the OP should not compromise use the word 'entitled', as in "you are entitled to be noisy until 11 p.m." as if their 'entitlement' should override everybody else's quiet enjoyment of their own property.

littlepattilou · 20/05/2021 14:24

[quote SakuraEdenSwan1]@Quaggars nothing unreasonable at all, only on MNet do you all get perpetually offended at literally anything, then all pile on just for the sake of it. [/quote]
@SakuraEdenSwan1

nothing unreasonable at all, only on MNet do you get an OP asking a question, not liking the replies, throwing their toys out of the pram, saying everyone else is wrong who disagrees, and then accusing people of a pile on just for the sake of it.

Fixed that for you... You're welcome.......Smile

Zzelda · 20/05/2021 16:09

Yeah, police do occasionally advise people leave a radio on for a few hours if they're out for the evening. They do NOT advise people to leave the radio on all bloody day, and every day, when the property is completely unoccupied

That's OK, then, OP isn't leaving the radio all day. Not sure why so many people are struggling to understand this basic fact.

Zzelda · 20/05/2021 16:11

@MLMsuperfan

If your neighbour applies for a noise abatement notice they'll likely get it because it's not reasonable to deliberately make noise from an empty property that is designed to be heard from outside. In fact if I was them I would get one now, because it will be a slam dunk.
Nonsense. Try getting a noise abatement order for a radio that is on low and intermittently during normal waking hours and see how quickly you get laughed out of the council offices.
Mumkins42 · 20/05/2021 17:29

Turn it off for the love of God

Jamiefraserskilt · 20/05/2021 17:32

You can get those plug in TV led light boxes which flash just like a TV which are also good and no, I do not think you are unreasonable in protecting your property. She is unreasonable to expect no noise. The house next to me is noisy because of young kids and a dog. I work from home. If it gets too much I put my headphones on.

keeptheaspidistra · 20/05/2021 17:35

Why are you posting in Aibu when you have clearly decided you're not being unreasonable? I would most certainly expect an empty house to be silent to be honest. If it's loud enough to have any impact and give the impression someone's home from the outside then stands to reason it's loud enough to bother you're neighbour. Why are you being an arse about it?

flaminjo · 20/05/2021 17:36

Sorry; I don't fully understand what you're asking/your post is confusing

Anyway, why do you need to have a radio playing all day until 11pm in an empty house?

She says she can hear it and it's annoying so why can't you turn it off? Do you think she's making it up that she can hear the radio to annoy you?

Madjakelmum · 20/05/2021 17:36

Stop with the bullshit of telling OP to turn it off.
Don’t turn it off leave it on ignore her calls and txts. It’s going to get worse when a family move in. Kids shouting tv music.

In fact turn the radio up louder. I would!! But I’m a bitch. 😘

Sarahrellyboo1987 · 20/05/2021 17:37

YANBU and can’t work our why the thread seems to think you are.

If you did live there then you’d be making more noise than vol 3 of Alexa. I would just reply saying you’ve turned it down and moved it but you won’t be turning it off. Reply that it is the last time you’ll be discussing it.

Deedlebum · 20/05/2021 17:41

Not to sound like a bitch, but rather to try help out, and I haven't read the ENTIRE thread so please forgive me, but it sound like you've asked for an opinion from this community, but then whenever people give their opinion or whatever, you have an explanation/reason to defend yourself.

As someone who is personally VERY sensitive to noises I can totally relate to your neighbour.
My neighbours must hate me because I'm constantly asking them to turn things down /off. But I apologize for it each time and give them a reason why and am totally realistic to never asking these things during normal day noisy times.

People hear things at different frequencies and at different pitches, and what might not bother some can bother others.
For me it's ticking clocks (I can hear our neighbours clock through our bedroom wall, and it genuinely almost drove me to complete crazy -lady land obsessing about hearing it and not wanting to be a fuss to neighbours, but genuinely being unable to sleep), when our neighbours oven is on it vibrates through the one side of our house giving me a headache if it's late at night and quiet all around (totally harmless during the day) and their boiler during certain hours making a hissing noise ok our property.

But give me a crying baby 24/7 and the noise doesn't bother me one single bit, or a dog barking or constant chatter throughout the night.

Respect your neighbours concerns and try teach an agreement between you. Trust me, having issues with a neighbour is more pain than its worth!

Good luck

Flynnshine · 20/05/2021 17:43

Sorry I haven't read the thread completely but another one here telling you to turn off the radio! I live in a terraced house next to a lady who has talk radio on all day long from 8am until 10pm - I've had to ask her to turn it down as it was a horrible mumbly background noise all day every day.

Believe me, it drove me insane! I couldn't concentrate on work or anything I wanted to watch on tv. I understand in terraced houses noise is to be expected, but in my opinion that is normal living noises, like walking/running up and down stairs, doors shutting or sometimes raised voices but I do not want to have someone else's music/radio or tv as the background to my entire day!

ittakes2 · 20/05/2021 17:43

I think I would be bothered by a radio on all day and up to 11pm at night. People do make noises but I have never lived in a terraced house where someone has been that rude.

CliffFace · 20/05/2021 17:44

I would have broken in and turned the volume down using a hammer.

Thevoiceofreason2021 · 20/05/2021 17:46

Turn it off. If you are so adamant that she can’t hear it, why do you have it on? It serves no purpose.

A neighbour who is home all day is better security than a radio.

Pissing tour neighbour off for no good reasons is insane

Harleyband · 20/05/2021 17:47

If you have a very good alarm with motion sensors and a light on a timer why do you also need a radio turned so low that the aspiring burglar has to press themselves up against the back door to hear it?

Another vote for just turning it off.

DumbestBlonde · 20/05/2021 17:48

Pointless. If they want to break in, a radio will not be a deterrent. Let her have some peace.

StaceyAndDa · 20/05/2021 17:50

I think the lockdown’s have made people a little crazy, I’m noticing people are a lot more paranoid, rude, angry, weird.

This situation is difficult as were aren’t your neighbour so we can’t hear it, sorry.

Bunnyfuller · 20/05/2021 17:55

Burglars won’t be put off by a bloody radio, woman! Ditto squatters. What do you have it on for?

Carriecakes80 · 20/05/2021 17:57

Again, if the neighbour can't hear it, and you are sure of that, whats the blooming point of it?? Surely then would-be burglars won't hear it either, which is surely what you are leaving it on for?? you sound very unreasonable. I can hear things my husband can't, my son can hear things I can't, everyone picks up things differently. You are being daft.

PeachyPeachTrees · 20/05/2021 18:00

What's the neighbour going to do when people move in and do stuff like talking and watching TV on normal volume. I'd hate to be them and have NDN coming over and asking for silence 24-7!

ambereeree · 20/05/2021 18:00

Oh God I had an empty terraced property and the neighbours continually complained once tennants were in. They got too used to having silence from one side.