To be shocked at parents allowing teenage rule breaking

[chocolateforeverymeal]

We have been really diligent with the covid rules. I assumed the people I respect enough to be good friends with were doing the same.

Seems not. We all have teens. Mine is desperate to have friends round, and has done so in the garden. Turns out teenagers with boyfriends, in particular, but others too, can't be expected to follow rules. Some really good friends, at least three different families, have been allowing indoors visits for teens for weeks.

Really pisses me off-as if it's easy for the mugs who follow rules but they are exceptions. And these are people who are quite sniffy about other people's standards at times.

Children are in bubbles and breaks/lunchtimes are short and often controlled. Eating lunch for 20 minutes together doesn't replace socialising freely.

Would you say that adults who have a job outside the house have enough social contact? Of course not, hence even a Tory government including outside meeting and bubbles as part of the Covid rules.

Having a different person each day might be unwise but the same person regularly is not imo

@Rosebel

Children mental health shouldn't be such an issue now. Children are back at school, back with their friends so they don't actually need to see their friends after school too. Surely it was during lockdown last year that it was worse. Now things should be improving (without seeing their friends as and when they want). I'm also wondering if everything will go back to normal on 21st June with the new variant of Covid. However people can do as they please and I suppose it'll be a non issue tomorrow.

Mine dropped out of school towards the end of last year. He won't have been the only one. Teenagers do not benefited from being isolated.

@Rosebel

Children mental health shouldn't be such an issue now. Children are back at school, back with their friends so they don't actually need to see their friends after school too. Surely it was during lockdown last year that it was worse. Now things should be improving (without seeing their friends as and when they want). I'm also wondering if everything will go back to normal on 21st June with the new variant of Covid. However people can do as they please and I suppose it'll be a non issue tomorrow.

Depends if your friends are at school or in your school bubble.

Ds’s girlfriend has a nightmare with the kids at school. It’s a toxic environment for her socially. Seeing Ds was her only outlet during a very stressful time (she’s year 11).

Children mental health shouldn't be such an issue now. Children are back at school, back with their friends so they don't actually need to see their friends after school too

You forget that the damage is alredy done.

School is not the social hub it once was with kids in bubbles and limited contact during break time. School is currently very regimented.

Letting teenagers meet up with their friends in an relaxed manner helping them to recover.

@Rosebel

Children mental health shouldn't be such an issue now. Children are back at school, back with their friends so they don't actually need to see their friends after school too. Surely it was during lockdown last year that it was worse. Now things should be improving (without seeing their friends as and when they want). I'm also wondering if everything will go back to normal on 21st June with the new variant of Covid. However people can do as they please and I suppose it'll be a non issue tomorrow.

I disagree.

Once metal health has taken a nose dive it's not simply a case of it spontaneously improving once things begin to get back to normal.

Also, at my DC school they have a 30 minute lunch break, which is tricky due to the controlled queuing needed for to protect bubbles. For this and many other reasons school is not sufficient in terms of socialisation for most teenagers.

You are kidding?

I think kids need a bloody break. Mine aren’t teenage yet but if they were I would be encouraging it. It’s disgusting what we have asked if our young people

Quick update.
Ds had a few friends over and they drank (weak lager) played football, listened to music, ate pizza and did so much laughing.
The normality was absolutely joyous. To see them together, chatting and just enjoying each other's company was just lovely after all these months of lockdown and isolation.
No regrets from me.

Unfortunately that is why it's spreading again in certain areas. Apparently there's a particular school in Bolton at the epicentre

@motogogo

Unfortunately that is why it's spreading again in certain areas. Apparently there's a particular school in Bolton at the epicentre

And do you have a reliable source for this 'fact'? 'Apparently' isn't enough for me to stop my teenage dcs from starting to live their lives again.

@motogogo

Unfortunately that is why it's spreading again in certain areas. Apparently there's a particular school in Bolton at the epicentre

My teen dropped out so isn't spreading any Covid round school.

It's interesting that you consider the out of school meetings to be responsible for the spread of covid among teens who are also together in school though. Is this a new strain that can only spread evenings/weekends?

You do realize, OP, that there are lots of countries that never had the crazy “no inside mixing” rule and they haven’t all dropped dead, don’t you? If you’re looking for someone to blame for what you perceive to be a big problem (because the government told you it is) then it’s not teenagers spending time with a friend indoors. That’s not the problem. Especially when they have spent all day together in school already.

@motogogo

Unfortunately that is why it's spreading again in certain areas. Apparently there's a particular school in Bolton at the epicentre

When places like care homes and factories have outbreaks did you blame the residents or employees?

Only CEV teens will have had a vaccine so it's not surprising that a school might have an outbreak.

The government has encouraged the public to point the finger at different groups and businesses to detract from their incompetence. Kids have to (and should) go to school. It is politicians who have designed schools that are overcrowded with poor ventilation.

Unfortunately that is why it's spreading again in certain areas. Apparently there's a particular school in Bolton at the epicentre

We are nowhere near Bolton, teens in our area are mixing in school bubbles and outside schools...
So where is the evidence?

My DD’s boyfriend lives two doors along, it would have been unutterably cruel to keep them apart.. as well as pointless.

Can't get excited about it. Teens must have really suffered this past year. I'm older and have manged as best I can but if this had happened when I was a teenager it would have broken me.

@motogogo

Unfortunately that is why it's spreading again in certain areas. Apparently there's a particular school in Bolton at the epicentre

Yes, it was very clear that schools were the key driver of transmission in the autumn.

Of course schools will be epicentres - that's what drove community transmission last year.

Which has precisely nothing to do with 'rule breaking' by teens or anyone else.

Rosebel unfortunately, the fact that you think that mental health 'shouldn't be such an issue' for young people now isn't being borne out in schools, FE and HE across the world.

It's a MAJOR issue - it was before the pandemic - please don't dismiss the extent of distress amongst young people in this way.

@motogogo

Unfortunately that is why it's spreading again in certain areas. Apparently there's a particular school in Bolton at the epicentre

'Apparently'

So a school is 'apparently' at the epicentre, and the reason children at this school have Covid is because they have had a friend over, rather than because they are sitting with 30 other children in each lesson?

False news. How ridiculous.

If you spend the whole school day with someone, I’ve never understood why you can’t also hang out with them afterwards. It’s not like covid stops when they’re at school then restarts when they finish. It isn’t logical to expect them to stay apart after school.

@motogogo

Unfortunately that is why it's spreading again in certain areas. Apparently there's a particular school in Bolton at the epicentre

No, it's spreading amongst vunerable people who have refused the vaccine.

We've allowed the girlfriend to visit right through lockdown. It was a very difficult decision. She lives far away. The are IN LOVE. Sometimes in lockdown I snuck into the lake for an open water swim and the lake is 8 miles from my house (I had to duck a few times to avoid the police. I am not sure they saw me. I am not sure police CAN see middle aged women is swimming costumes. We have invisibility powers)

I think many people did risk assessments to make small adjustments for mental health.

I wish there was something we could have done for younger teen. I think he's still not quite recovered from lockdown and I am worried about him. He is going to a lot of parties now and struggling with limits. I have no regrets about girlfriend in lockdown.

@Rosebel

Children mental health shouldn't be such an issue now. Children are back at school, back with their friends so they don't actually need to see their friends after school too. Surely it was during lockdown last year that it was worse. Now things should be improving (without seeing their friends as and when they want). I'm also wondering if everything will go back to normal on 21st June with the new variant of Covid. However people can do as they please and I suppose it'll be a non issue tomorrow.

Great, thank you I will let DD know she’s cured now.

@ghostyslovesheets

oh dear - how awful - terrible really

My DD has had her GF over a few times - they spend all day together in school - absolutely do not see the difference

Teenagers have lost so much I just can't begrudge then some bloody friendship - most of us old farts are vaccinated - they aren't - they wont be for ages - give then a bloody break

You don't see the difference? The 'difference' is minimising social contact, as you never know when transmission takes place, or exactly when someone becomes infectious before their symptoms show. Also, at school she is in contact with your DD, in your house she could also be passing the virus to the rest of your family. Just because DD is in school with her all day doesn't necessarily mean she would catch covid from her (not ALL close contacts will catch it after all) but by having her in your house you might catch it, or other family members, and then take it to your workplaces or to elderly relatives etc.

Now imagine if EVERYONE had that attitude.

Do you still not see the difference?

@Rosebel

Children mental health shouldn't be such an issue now. Children are back at school, back with their friends so they don't actually need to see their friends after school too. Surely it was during lockdown last year that it was worse. Now things should be improving (without seeing their friends as and when they want). I'm also wondering if everything will go back to normal on 21st June with the new variant of Covid. However people can do as they please and I suppose it'll be a non issue tomorrow.

Thai doesn't make any sense. For a start, mental health problems take a hold of you. They don't just go away once the situation is removed. Also, schools have cut back most of the social time kids used to get. We used to have an hour for lunch. Kids these days usually have two short breaks per day.

In addition, think of all the kids for whom school is incredibly stressful. My dd's mental health is so bad she doesn't even go to school anymore.

Or kids who don't have friends at school but rather have friends or bfs/gfs from different schools.

Genuinely feel sorry for your teens