How do others cope with a snoring partner?

[shortbreadinthehighlands]

I’m really struggling with being up for hours in the middle of the night

@shortbreadinthehighlands

I know I want separate rooms but he gets upset when I mention it. Ear plugs possibly but worried about not being able to hear dc. What a bloody mess

If you have the option of separate rooms use it.

If he is upset it is up to him to proactively research ways to fix his snoring - lose weight, exercise, try different sleeping positions /pillows/aids, see a doctor etc. you can't fix this and it is you that should be upset if he doesn't try.

Tough shit if he’s upset about it it’s either spare room for one of you (him) or he sorts it out.

I was in spare room for years due to dh being selfish snoring and not sorting it and he moans every night about me leaving. Absolute nerve of him makes me despise him even more but that’s for another thread 😂. Don’t have a spare room anymore so now I end up sharing with dd in double bed it’s a joke.

I don’t know how people can share the bed for years no sleep is the same as genuine torture

Keep waking him. Every time. See how long he lasts and how he likes it.
He’s being a selfish arse.

Earplugs and a simba super king mattress works wonders...

I snore. I always have and we knew I had sleep apnea. It got worse of course when I gained weight and husband said something, I immediately booked an appt at a sleep clinic and now I have a CPAP.

My 4 yo snores too occasionally. This adorable little soft snore. He's not large. I'd say he has the same issue as me. Men snoring is so much more "accepted" than a girl snoring so it sucks for me but at least he won't have the judgement I did.

Separate rooms work for us

Separate rooms for sure. But prior to that a swift kick every time he snores to make him change position helped briefly, and was very satisfying. But I snore too, so can't really complain.

Some good ideas on this thread.

For some years, I used to poke him enough that it disturbed him enough which stopped it.
Then for some years, I used to pinch and unpinch his nose, and tell him to blow through it which was often enough to lower the volume so I could sleep.
Then we went through a phase of him having some sort of small rubber contraption from the chemist around his nose[dont remember what happened to it eventually].
Currently, he doesnt weigh as much as he did[he was never that overweight], and between that, and me not working quite as hard as I used to, so sleep not being quite as important as it was, we sort of muddle through.

I've worn earplugs for over 20 years now, started when I was a teenager at home and my dad snored loud enough to shake the walls, I'm so used to them now I can't sleep without them! My DH also snores and to be fair to him so do I, we both use the laser lite earplugs someone linked right at the beginning of the thread and they're the best I've found. I have a nearly 2.5 year old son and not once have I slept through him crying on the baby monitor. I have it a couple of tabs down from its loudest setting and next to me in the bedside cabinet and if he wakes up I know it! I've also been woken by the smoke alarm when it malfunctioned and went off at 4am (a terrifying experience!!) Even the best earplugs you can get only block about 39db, crying babies and alarms are 80-100db. So while they're great for dulling/blocking a snoring partner so you can actually sleep you'll still hear the important things. If one of us has a particularly bad cold so we know we're going to be louder than usual we'll go in separate rooms to save disturbing the other. Sleep deprivation is awful and I hope you're able to find a solution xx

Separate rooms for the last eighteen years here. Better he resents you as he hasn’t got a human teddy to cuddle in the middle of the night that you resent him for chronic sleep deprivation.

Separate bedrooms. Massively underrated, upset or not.

@dementedpixie. Just what I was thinking.
My husband has been snoring for the last 5 years but it has got worse over time and he has just been diagnosed with sleep apnoea.
We are awaiting any help at the moment but I get into bed every night with him, cuddle etc then get up and leave.
He now has the dog bed in "his" room as she bloody snores too so they can spend their night competing for the grunty noise contest!
Best thing we ever did was having separate rooms. I sleep, he sleeps, the dog sleeps!
I suppose we are lucky to have an extra room, God knows what we would do if not?
I would have to kit out the summer house!

Separate bedroom! It's not fair on you, upset or not. Unless he'd like to / can get help with his snoring?

Ear plugs. Sleep separately when it's too much.

Separate room... sleep depravity/irritation is just awful... and DH/I kept different hours... I read/watch TV till late, he woke @ 5am ish...

My DP put loads of weight on and started snoring really badly. We've had separate rooms for the last two years. Total game changer.

He's now lost the weight and isn't snoring as badly as before. I haven't told him though because I've got used to sleeping alone and I love it

@JemimaTiggywinkle

Separate rooms are the best thing ever. You can still start off in the same room and have a cuddle/sex/whatever, but then one of you goes off.

Why would he be upset that you want to be able to sleep? You’re both unconscious, it’s not a reflection on your relationship.

Same. We’re as connected as ever but I just cannot sleep in the same room. It’s unbearable between the freight train snoring and thrashing about because he has very vivid dreams. I have to drink myself into oblivion every time we go on holiday 😆