Friend gave us a higher quote for the job

[ZizzyK]

We are looking to do some work in our office space. We were planning to use a close friend and neighbour for the work, however the quote they provided is much higher than what we were quoted by other people. We are now not sure whether to give the friend the work.

AIBU for considering giving the job to someone else?

What would you do in a situation like this

[Londontown12]

The high quote is usually because they don’t want the job or that’s what they charge I don’t believe in mates rates but it’s up too u but my advise is don’t mix business with friends x

[ImaginaryCat]

Like others I find it quite sad that people expect lower 'mates rates'. I have a friend who's a plumber. He's more expensive than most because he's got qualifications and certifications coming out of his ears. He's always got a queue of work.

A mutual friend expressed annoyance when he did a minor job for her and charged her more than expected. She thought because they're friends he'd do it at cost for her. But he's self employed and the sole breadwinner for his family. Mates rates doesn't put food in his kids mouths.

[cupsofcoffee]

I wonder why there's this huge assumption that tradesmen should give discounts to friends and family?

DH is a plasterer and will do work for friends and family but only if he's paid his asking price. Why should he work for cheap just because he knows the client?

[Butterfly44]

You could either say no and that you'll be going elsewhere or save face and lie by declining and saying you're postponing and then have it done by someone else. You can later say a family member did it. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[MargateSands]

I have a rule never to get work done by friends. It’s a recipe for disaster if something goes wrong or there’s a dispute.

[MsMarvellous]

I would never get a friend or family to do work on my house. Tried it once and snagging after was awful because they took everything as criticism and couldn't treat it as the business it was.

Perhaps your friend understands that working with people you know is fraught with this stuff and doesn't really want to do it.

[LawnFever]

@Newcastleteacake

It's never a good idea to mix business with friendships or family.

It's a sure fire way to end the relationship.

Agreed, a friends partner once fitted a kitchen for me, made such a mess of it I had to reorder the worktops and have him back to fix them, such a nightmare when you know someone & I’d never book anyone I know personally for stuff like this again.

[WildfirePonie]

Take the cheaper quote.

Never mix business with friends, family or neighbours.

[Overdueanamechange]

Are you comparing like for like? Is your friend perhaps VAT registered and the other company not? Is the work insured and guaranteed? Perhaps your friend's quote is a higher spec? The best thing to do is speak to your friend and explain. If it is just a case of day rate being higher, then either go with the cheaper or the person you trust.
In my DH's business we don't do "mate's rates" at all, we have too much responsibility to staff, but people still use us because of our reputation. My friend used another company as they had quoted a third less then us, which was fair enough, but she has regretted it ever since because it was not a reputable company and when things went wrong the tradesman was nowhere to be found.

[ThinWomansBrain]

If a friend discounts a job - the risk is that if they have full price jobs to juggle, yours will not be top priority,
If anything not completed to your satisfaction, how will you feel about complaining or asking the to correct it?

If the job is not discounted, at their normal professional rates - you should treat it as a professional quote and award the work based on whatever criteria you assess all the quotes on.

You can also be open, and say you'd like to use them, but the alternative quote is £x, are they able to match it?

[LivingDeadGirlUK]

How close a friend are they? Were you expecting a discount? If they are busy and booked up its unreasonable to expect them to turn down full price work to do 'mates rates' for you.

Its really common to go in high with a fee if you dont really want the work but want to keep the relationship valid. You dont have to go with your friend, your not doing them a favour!

[youngandbroken]

'mates rates' is all well and good but the trades person still has their own bills to pay and doing your job takes away time that they could be doing other jobs meaning less income for them. It could be that he doesn't want the job, or that is what he usually charges and works for him. I know trades people who quote higher than others but they do a fantastic job and leave the place spotless afterwards, they also get the job done fast and so they get more repeat business than others who quote less. Just go with a one of the cheaper quotes and as others have said don't mix business with friends/family because it always ends in tears.

[NewMatress]

I never go for the cheapest, there's a reason they need the work enough to be cheap, but similarly I prefer not to ask friends for all the reasons stated.

I do think the expectation of mates rates is outrageous. This is people's living, if they're working for you at a discount they're not earning their going rate in that time, how is that reasonable?

Maybe the friend wants to make sure friends stop asking for favours.

[tonimitchell]

I had the same. My best friends dh was out of work due to covid and she suggested I asked him because they could do with the money. He quote he gave me was eye watering and then lumped ‘tax’ on it when I know for a fact he doesn’t pay it.

He either couldn’t be arsed or wanted to rip me off.

I went else where. It was a bit awkward but we got over it.

[Cocomarine]

My joiner boyfriend massively over quotes when he doesn’t want the work and thinks the person will be a pita if he says so. Otherwise, he’s just upfront at not mixing but offers to look over quote as a sense check.

[Funnyface1]

I'd go elsewhere anyway. Things get incredibly difficult if you have a relationship with the person doing your work and there's a problem or you're unhappy with something. And that happens a lot.

[tonimitchell]

@Cocomarine

My joiner boyfriend massively over quotes when he doesn’t want the work and thinks the person will be a pita if he says so. Otherwise, he’s just upfront at not mixing but offers to look over quote as a sense check.

Yeah that’s a shitty thing to do. And it’s ripping people off. Like what happened to my 89 year old DGM because if they except the price when they do t know better

[Roselilly36]

I wouldn’t have a friend or neighbour do a job for me, I just think it’s asking for trouble to be honest.

You have put yourself in an awkward position now, if you have neighbour do the work, you will feel ripped off, if the job isn’t done well and you complain, likely to lead to a falling out.

If you get accept a cheaper quote, neighbour could be annoyed about it.

You can’t win this time. But a lesson learned for the future.

[TheNoodlesIncident]

I used to think that it was better and nicer to have someone you know personally to do jobs for you, but like others I've realised it's actually harder if you feel there's a problem with the work done. It makes you feel really uncomfortable and awkward as a minimum, plus the issue of having the problem rectified on top. I've had this happen a few times and I wouldn't ask now. Recommendations are better.

I think you're better off forgetting about your friend's quote and just get someone else in to do the work. The higher quote probably is to put you off, either because they foresee these issues and want to avoid all that, or because they are genuinely busy and it would be ages before they could fit you in, a reason like that.

Just don't mention it again and carry on as you were.

[Catmuffin]

If someone doesn't want a job they should say they can't fit it in as they have too much else booked in. Charging 75% extra as they don't want the job is unethical as some people won't realise they are being ripped off. You often hear of people in the local paper being scammed by being massively overcharged by workmen that the householder trusts

[Summerfun54321]

Quoting high because you don’t want the job doesn’t apply to a friend. I would never do this because of the situation you’re now in. Just speak to them and tell them theirs was higher and ask way. Common courtesy in my opinion.

[Hankunamatata]

My dad overprices when he doesnt want the job and person doesnt take no for an answer. Rare time they have come back and accepted the quote he puts them off

[Cocomarine]

@Catmuffin

If someone doesn't want a job they should say they can't fit it in as they have too much else booked in. Charging 75% extra as they don't want the job is unethical as some people won't realise they are being ripped off. You often hear of people in the local paper being scammed by being massively overcharged by workmen that the householder trusts

Not really - because if the 75% doesn’t work, you can then say you’re too busy to fit it in, or if you really end up doing it you can lie to bring the price back down - oh it took less time, or, my mate at Howdens had this as a return so gave it to me almost free.

Saying you’re too busy doesn’t always work, as my joiner boyfriend finds. People just say they’ll wait. Or surely he can just squeeze it in... Or, in the case of one family member, had a go at him for lying when he worked 6 days then on Sunday took his kid to Alton Towers. “Not that busy then?” on Facebook post!!

Trust me - or rather, trust his experience - he knows that over pricing leads to the least hassle for him.

[IndigoHexagon]

Just has this exact dilemma. Friends husband starting up his own business and we needed the service he provided. He quoted over 2.5 times what the other two people I had round for the quotes did. I didn’t give him the work and was honest and told him why, he didn’t even reply to my message (and he’d asked for feedback!) so I’m glad I didn’t give him the work.
The guys who did come round and do the job were brilliant, did it half the time the friend had said it would take and did a fantastic job.

[Summerfun54321]

*why