To think that it's Unfair for a Child to be punished when they hadn't done anything wrong??

[Heathercob]

When I was in school my friend was coming home with me for a sleepover after school one Friday. We had planned everything - pizza and chocolate cheesecake for tea, baking chocolate chip cookies, sleeping downstairs and having film night, and the obvious midnight feast with chocolate and biscuits before going shopping and to the cinema on the Saturday.
However, on the Friday my friend got into trouble and her parents were called into school (another girl 'said' that she'd stolen her folder and chucked her English work in a bin).
The result was that the sleepover was cancelled and even though I hadn't done anything wrong, I didn't get to do any of the fun things planned 😡😡😡! Boring chicken, potatoes and veg for tea, bed at normal time and homework and food shopping the following day 😭😭!
AIBU to think that my friend's punishment (if she had even done what the girl had accused her of), could have been postponed until after my sleepover?

@KaptainKaveman

Chocolate cheesecake? Is that an actual thing? It sounds repulsive.

Chocolate cheesecake is amazing.

This wasn't about you. Your friend as a consequence was punished, I would do the same.

@KaptainKaveman

Chocolate cheesecake? Is that an actual thing? It sounds repulsive.

This must be the weirdest post on this thread.

OP posted quite late, they'll be very tired for school today.

Chocolate cheesecake is yummy - top it with crushed Wispa and drizzle of raspberry coulis and caramel sauce.

Also if my kid had the cheek to call the meal I stood and cooked boring then he would be in charge of making the next meal. I would also be telling him to find better friends.

It was fair enough that your friend wasn't allowed. But as a parent I'd probably have just done it without her, had the food etc.

KaptainKaveman

Chocolate cheesecake? Is that an actual thing? It sounds repulsive

You've never heard of chocolate cheesecake, do you live in a cave?!

Btw, it's a bit sickly, but if you love chocolate I guess you'd love chocolate cheesecake. Give me lemon any day.

Oh, and OP, yabu!

Did this happen last week? If so, 23:14 is rather late for you to be posting.

You’ll be like a bear with a sore head today.

Childhood unfairnesses remain - I'm 64 an I hold a huge grudge against a much older brother to this day.

A minute on the lips, a lifetime on the hips. Think of all the sugary and fatty food you were spared.

Your friend's parents actions in supporting the school and not thinking their child was an angel, or being soft, is to be applauded and I wish all parents today thought the same.

How has someone never heard of chocolate cheese cake? That's quite impressive.

I mean I don't like the sound of I, so have never eaten it but not enough to deny its existence.

(Settles in)

@Quincie

Childhood unfairnesses remain - I'm 64 an I hold a huge grudge against a much older brother to this day.

After 🙄 at the OP, I have just been assailed by a memory - age 7, had arranged a play date with a friend coming over to my house in the afternoon. I normally played in the street with kids but didn't often have 'playdates' with them coming to my house so this was unusual and exciting for me.

Spent all morning like a dog with two tails as the excitement built. Remember the impatience and anticipation draining away as the clock ticked well into the afternoon and no friend showed up. My mum eventually phoned her mum and she'd just decided she didn't want to come after all or let me know.

Damn you, OP!

This is bizzare

YABU for not understanding why she would no longer be able to sleep over.

YANBU for being disappointmeted that you didn't get to do any of the fun things planned. It you were my DC I'd do at least some of the things with you instead. Heck I might even stay up and pretend it's a sleepover! Unless your parents wanted to keep it aside for another day?

YABU to bring this up years later. It's not that bigger deal. Have you had the opportunity to eat pizza since then?

I don't usually cancel plans with friends for this reason though. I feel bad putting out some one's family by changing plans at the last minute. Punishment is usually loss of screen time.

Was there any investigation at all into the folder story? I'm inclined to think it was possibly true. If my child did something that bad I'd probably cancel the sleepover, especially if I thought you were leaned to being a bad influence.

I hope she rang Childline.

Is this real or is it actually about your child?

Either way, I feel it's just tough luck for the child who was looking forward to the sleepover and hadn't done anything wrong. It's not unreasonable for the parents to impose that punishment straight away.

Chocolate cheesecake is lush, I haven't got over the disappearance of he one that Starbucks used to do 20 years ago, its most unfair. Before anyone asks, I have had lots of bereavements to cope with, bad family situations to deal with , tricky work situations like the best of all. And I am 46 not 16, hence the 20 years ago memory. But you know what, its not fair, why should I be punished for bad sales?

Oh this brightened up my morning!
Hurry up OP, school bus leaves soon.

As Charles Dickens wrote:

In the little world in which children have their existence, whosoever brings them up, there is nothing so finely perceived and so finely felt as injustice

It's so true. "It's not fair!' is such a universal and ubiquitous utterance from children. Indignation at some of our earlier injustices can still rankle years later.

OP I think people are being a bit horrible to you here (on AIBU? what a surprise!) but you ought to let it go now. You weren't punished; you missed out on a treat, that's all.

@BettyUnderswoob

As Charles Dickens wrote:

In the little world in which children have their existence, whosoever brings them up, there is nothing so finely perceived and so finely felt as injustice

Which book please? I don't remember that paragraph.
Love Reading Charles Dickens

Time to move on, OP. 😬