Really shaken up. Did I do anything wrong here?

[seventymodules]

For past two years I have done the school run, I park on a street near the school. There is a detached house with a driveway and a patch of grass next to the driveway. I park in front of the patch of grass, not blocking the driveway whatsoever.

Once I drop my child at school I get collected by my workmate (we are cleaners so have company car) and then work till 3 until I have to return for school run and car.

This morning as I was getting out of the car the lady in the house came charging out, she said 'can you stop parking your car in front of my house?' I said 'it's a public road' and she said 'you park out here 5 days a week, if you refuse to move it I should make you aware that I will be cutting my grass today and any damage to your car is not my responsibility' said with a sarcastic smile on her face, she then walked back into the house shaking her head.

I've left the car but worried now she is going to damage it.

Am I being unreasonable parking it there? It's a public road and not on her property at all.

If you get annoyed by seeing the same car/ van out of your window, take a deep breath and really consider how lucky you are.
If your problems run to this shallow extent, you are a very, very fortune person.
After taking that deep breath, give your head a wobble and look out of another window.
Then maybe even consider volunteering to work with people who have real problems.

@AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken

If you get annoyed by seeing the same car/ van out of your window, take a deep breath and really consider how lucky you are. If your problems run to this shallow extent, you are a very, very fortune person. After taking that deep breath, give your head a wobble and look out of another window. Then maybe even consider volunteering to work with people who have real problems.

This is so sanctimonious.

It’s ridiculous how many people make excuses about emergency services. If a road tis too narrow for parking to allow emergency services get through, there are parking restrictions on it.

If people want space for their imaginary millions of visitors, or for the occasional work vans, buy a house with parking.

If you rely on roadside parking, you risk that other people will quite legally park there.

Talking about it from a moral standpoint is ridiculous. Are drivers supposed to know which of the houses on a street has the most compelling reason for requirement for a space? Having two cars you are playing a bizzare driveway tag with, does that trump the needing space for a daily carer visit? Must drivers assume any road with a house on it shouldn’t be parked on?

@heidipi

So you @Thiscantreallybehappening would add 10 mins to your day to find a space further out just to "vary it up a bit", so that someone else on the school run could benefit and do the same thing legally?

Its not just the school run though is it?, it is from 9 - 3, 5 days a week for 2 years. If if was the school run only the woman would probably just ignore it.

@CounsellorTroi

And yet it's so very true

RogueRebel Regarding etiquette -Yes, there's a legal right as long as you pay your road tax blah de blah, of course. Most people aren't arguing with the legality of it, that's different. But in terms of etiquette? It's considered bad form to some people if the same car is parked there on a constant/permanent/everyday basis, rather than just occasional or random. Rightly or wrongly, some people wouldn't mind a different car every day nearly as much as they mind the same car using the same space for months/years on end outside their house, because it would eventually feel to be that that car has "claimed" that space as their own personal parking space when it should be for anyone. Especially if it's all day, because random parkers may come and go, be there for an hour or so etc rather than all day, so some of the time you wouldn't have a car there perhaps. Despite it being a public road etc etc etc etc legal and road tax etc - not arguing with that. But in terms of etiquette, to some people it's about giving some other parker a turn in the space, or giving the home owner a break from seeing your car parked outside most of the time.

I personally feel awkward when I (legally) park in front of someone's house on a very residential road, especially if the space isn't shielded by a hedge and/or the distance to the house from the space is short and/or the houses are close together and there isn't much parking. To me, it does feel like invading their personal space or view, even though it's perfectly legal.

@heidipi

Yes, actually I would rotate where I parked, even if that meant that I had a bit further to walk because, although it is legal, I have some awareness and respect for other people and I would understand that it could be irritating for someone to have to put up with my parked car everyday.

Its not just the school run though is it?, it is from 9 - 3, 5 days a week for 2 years. If if was the school run only the woman would probably just ignore it.

Given kids are at school for only about 190 days a year, it’s a few weeks at a time. But the point was being made there is nothing to stop another school runner doing the same thing as the OP.

As others have stated, yes you are in the right legally as it is a public road but imo you are being a bit of a dick. This presumably, although a public road, is a residential street? You are neither a resident of that street nor are you visiting any residents on that street, you are using the space outside her house as if it was a parking space in the car park at your work premises.

It’s ridiculous how many people make excuses about emergency services. If a road tis too narrow for parking to allow emergency services get through, there are parking restrictions on it

@MintyMabel that’s not always the case. I lived on a street with semis with driveways on one side of the narrow street and terraced houses on the other. Only a car could get down with the terrace owners parked on their side. No restrictions, although the fire service that had to visit one day did say, if it came to it, they would just plough down the street and not worry about hitting vehicles

This is taking the piss really isn't it?

I know the road is a public highway and I've no compuction about parking outside houses, and have done so many times.

But to park outside the same house for two years, that's a bit off. Nothing legally wrong with it and you're free to do it, it just doesn't seem very considerate.

@ToodleSquat

People are so weird about parking. I see nothing wrong with what you're doing. Fine it irritates her but such is life. Where I live parking is a 'mare and people often park near my house (no driveway) and go to work in the high street. Yes it's irritating but are they doing anything wrong? No.

People are honestly insane about parking. We lived in a terrace with on street parking and recently moved to a cul de sac with a small drive. My MIL when we moved said she would visit more often as she wouldnt have the 'nightmare of parking'. She is 50, no health conditions whatsoever but would see her small grandchildren less often because of 2 minutes trying to find a parking space. I find that completely and utterly bizarre (and sad).

@NurseButtercup

Why does it matter if it's the same car?? How is it actually affecting you?

It is the fact that OP parks there 5 days a week, 9 am - 3pm and has done for 2 years. It is legal but it is also taking the piss. This woman's house is not a drop off and pick up zone for OP's work. I'm sure other people might park there but they probably wouldn't be there all day for 5 days a week. What is annoying the woman is the fact that OP does this every day.

@AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken

If you get annoyed by seeing the same car/ van out of your window, take a deep breath and really consider how lucky you are. If your problems run to this shallow extent, you are a very, very fortune person. After taking that deep breath, give your head a wobble and look out of another window. Then maybe even consider volunteering to work with people who have real problems.

Ha!

I trust you don't use language like that when you are out there doing your wobble headed, halo burnishing holier than thou volunteering. Because you would drive the undeserving volunteer victims ('take a deep breath while I patronise you, darling') absolutely nuts.
Anymore cliches for us? Shall we let that sink in? Consider the wee donkey? Have a word with ourselves?

CounsellorTroi

If the biggest issue in your life, so much so you’re threatening vandalism, is actually (at very worst) a mild inconvenience, you really need to appreciate how lucky you are.

To you that’s sanctimonious. To me that’s perspective.

You can park there but honestly if someone parked their car everyday out the front of my house I would be annoyed.

The OP has managed to park in 'her spot' for two freaking years, blissfully unaware of the social norms. I am curious what her next move, parkingwise, will be.

@Thiscantreallybehappening but what is your legally parked car doing that needs putting up with? If you park it somewhere else, a different car will park where yours is. All that does is change the view.

@unwuthering

What the fuck 😂

Oh, totes hilaire!

Birds of a feather flock together and this thread is particularly full of entitled types who feel they need to aggressively assert their 'rights', rather than exercise a little consideration for others.

Yes indeed - the woman is being exceptionally inconsiderate threatening to damage the Ops car. Of course she has the 'right' to mow the public highway if she wishes, but to do it knowingly with the intention of attempting to damage the car is beyond the pale.

[quote Thiscantreallybehappening]**@NurseButtercup

Why does it matter if it's the same car?? How is it actually affecting you?

It is the fact that OP parks there 5 days a week, 9 am - 3pm and has done for 2 years. It is legal but it is also taking the piss. This woman's house is not a drop off and pick up zone for OP's work. I'm sure other people might park there but they probably wouldn't be there all day for 5 days a week. What is annoying the woman is the fact that OP does this every day.[/quote]
I'm so confused.
What does this woman need the car sized bit of road outside her house for that means the OP should stop or change what she is doing?

Listener2021

No, the people I work with have actual problems. That’s why my neighbour parking outside my front window most of the time really doesn’t bother me.

@bjrce

Wasn't very nice what she said, obviously she's very frustrated with your car being parked outside her house day in /day out.

At first, I thought you were just parking your car to drop your child to school, that would be perfectly reasonable but the fact you are leaving your car there all day every day is a bit rich. She may have visitors during the day and you are obviously causing an inconvenience to her.
Based on her reaction I would not antagonise the situation.

Some people would say, its legal, sod her! I'll do what I want, but its not a nice thing to do.

Stay out of the residential areas

This.

Oh, she lost her temper. Not pleasant, not good, but after stewing on it for two years, she went a bit frothing at the mouth. It's certainly given the OP something to think about that she's never considered before.

@DandelionRose

RogueRebel Regarding etiquette -Yes, there's a legal right as long as you pay your road tax blah de blah, of course. Most people aren't arguing with the legality of it, that's different. But in terms of etiquette? It's considered bad form to some people if the same car is parked there on a constant/permanent/everyday basis, rather than just occasional or random. Rightly or wrongly, some people wouldn't mind a different car every day nearly as much as they mind the same car using the same space for months/years on end outside their house, because it would eventually feel to be that that car has "claimed" that space as their own personal parking space when it should be for anyone. Especially if it's all day, because random parkers may come and go, be there for an hour or so etc rather than all day, so some of the time you wouldn't have a car there perhaps. Despite it being a public road etc etc etc etc legal and road tax etc - not arguing with that. But in terms of etiquette, to some people it's about giving some other parker a turn in the space, or giving the home owner a break from seeing your car parked outside most of the time.

I personally feel awkward when I (legally) park in front of someone's house on a very residential road, especially if the space isn't shielded by a hedge and/or the distance to the house from the space is short and/or the houses are close together and there isn't much parking. To me, it does feel like invading their personal space or view, even though it's perfectly legal.

But you can see that the feelings in someone else's head are their own problem - wanting a variety of car colours on display really isn't theirs to demand and if they get so riled up by a car, they need to go see their GP because that level of control freakery is a mental health issue.

The road into where I live doesn't go anywhere but round the housing scheme. We get people coming in and parking on the road and it's annoying as it blocks the road and so changes it into a single lane which is a pain to get up and down. While she should deal with it better I would find it annoying.