Child alone in car at supermarket

[weakpanda]

AIBU to think of your child isn't old enough/safe enough to sit in the front seat of the car it's not safe to leave them alone in the car while you shop???

At Tesco earlier while loading my shopping i saw a child alone in the car next to mine. I got the refg of the car and was going to go into Tesco and let security know but then the mum came back and started shouting at him, think he had set an alarm off earlier as hazard lights were flashing.

She then started shouting at him to get into the back of the car as he wasn't old enough to sit in the front and it wouldn't be safe, this boy I'm guessing would have been around 7/8 years old, he was crying so much and then they left.

It's been bugging me all day, nothing I can do about it now but that poor boy

My DS is 9 and very sensible. I would leave him in the car if I was going to be away for a very short period of time (petrol station or buying milk from the corner shop), but not for any longer.

It’s fine.
Why is there an issue with the child sitting in the front seat of a stationary car?

My ds, my judgement.. Nobody else's..

I think people nowadays don't realise their job as parents is to raise children to be independent, self sufficient, capable adults...

@DinoHat

It’s fine. Why is there an issue with the child sitting in the front seat of a stationary car?

Handbrake

I think minimum the child would need to demonstrate they can get out the locked car but also be trusted not to get out of the locked car unless emergancy

@otterbaby

Think it depends on the child. If my mum needed to go shopping, I'd opt to sit in the car and read instead when I was that age. I don't think that's necessarily too young but would vary by child.

Me too, and I’ve made it to 50. Dad showed me how to use the radio, and mum and dad would watch me lock the car from the inside as they left. When they came back they’d knock on the window for me to open the doors.

I think many children are babied today. If a NT 7 or 8 year old is told not to mess with the controls, or to open the doors or windows to anyone except parents, they are old enough to understand and obey. I can remember being given lots of independence at brownies and school by that age so it’s not just my parents who trusted us and gave us responsibility. We were allowed to ride bikes 3 miles to school unaccompanied on country lanes for cycling proficiency lessons. But maybe childhood was somehow different in the 70s.

AIBU to think of your child isn't old enough/safe enough to sit in the front seat of the car it's not safe to leave them alone in the car while you shop???

Two completely different things, especially as at that age they should still be in a booster which may well be in the back.

@JackANackAnoreeee

Yanbu. I was left in the car all the time, one time I got bored and released the hand break......

This happened in our town. A man took one of his children to the toilets at the bus station. The remaining children in the car were messing and let the hand brake off. The car park has a gradient and the car started rolling towards a bank. The father tried to stop the car going over the bank with his kids in it and became trapped under the car and was killed.

www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-53255375.amp

It's not safe to leave children in cars unattended.

I think personally it’s non of your business and irrelevant what you think. All that matters is that you parent your children how you see fit.
Parents aren’t here to teach other parents, there are many things about parenting that people will disagree on.
I think we live in a world where we get judged enough as people as it is so unless a child is in danger I would carry on about your day and not concern yourself with things that are non of your business.
I don’t mean the above to sound in a rude way just getting straight to the point.

Car might have had an automatic handbrake.
It’s all about assessing risk, and what’s acceptable to one isn’t to another. That’s what makes us individual human beings.

I used to beg to stay in the car and read a book rather then having to be dragged around the supermarket. I feel a bit sorry for kids these days, being treated like toddlers until they are teenagers. I wouldn't leave my own kids in the car- not because I don't trust them, but because I would be worried about someone sticking their nose in and calling the police

I’d leave my 8 year old in the car for 5/10 minutes and wouldn’t even think twice about it. She’s mature and responsible enough not to dick about with buttons and if they’re locked in the car, what can really happen?

I don’t see why you can’t take a 7 year old into the supermarket with you though. Why leave them in the car? But yeah, depends on the child I guess. Also I wouldn’t then tear a strip off him for setting the alarm off.

My friend left her 5 and 3 year olds in the car while she went a did a full shop. I was fucking horrified. Her DH was even at home but he won’t look after them on his own so she has to take them. No joke. I actually can’t believe this shit happens. Poor kids man.

I tbink if ypu can't trust your 7or 8 year old nt child to wait t for a short while in the car, you have gone wrong somewhere.
What an insufferable busy body!

I worked in a supermarket as a teenager and I would hate it when people reporting things like this to me. I’d tell my manager and they would shrug their shoulders at me.

Even now I’m still not sure what people expect a supermarket to do. If someone is that concerned that call the police or non emergency line - don’t pass the buck.

That’s extremely strange! You do know secondary school age children, 11+ the majority walk home, navigating buses and road crossings and you wouldn’t trust a 12 year old not to let off a hand brake?!

Obviously not all 12 year olds are exactly that same and some have underlying issues which means that some can’t be left alone which is why the PP said she wouldn’t.

I leave my son in the car sometimes if i pop to the supermarket and he doesn't want to come in, he looks about 8 but he's actually 11.

Mind your business......

There are adults who aren't technically tall or heavy enough to sit in the front seat, though thankfully the law doesn't prevent them (yet.)

Are you sure she wasn’t just putting the trolley back? Was she actually shopping?

My friend left her 5 and 3 year olds in the car while she went a did a full shop.... Her DH was even at home but he won’t look after them on his own so she has to take them.

Obviously never left to cope on his own as a kid, and this is how he turned out as an adult ...

@Aprilwasverywet

You wouldn't leave your 12 year old in a car? 12? Or did you mean 2?

If you can't leave your 12 year old alone then something has gone wrong somewhere along he way

By 12, I was getting the train 12 miles into the nearest city to go shopping and go to the cinema with my friends the same age. I was left at home while mum went shopping. Being left in the car alone was like, the most basic thing. Also walked home from school alone... you know, all the stuff 12 year olds do. You might need to up your parenting game now or your child will fall behind his friends in regards to his education as an independently functioning human.

@Brokenpencilsarepointless not all 12 year olds can be left alone. Some 30+ year olds can’t be left alone depending on their issues. It has nothing to do with a lack of parenting how rude!

I leave my 7 year old if I’m just nipping in to the local shop. I would never leave him whilst I went into a big supermarket.

I would never, ever leave young children in the car whilst I’m not there. The story a couple of years ago of a toddler who released the handbrake and the car slipped into a lake just haunted me for ages
I feel bad leaving DD in the car when I’m pushing the trolley back!! She is only little though (3.5).