To want people to calm my baby by his actual name?

[SimGuruRu]

Name change as outing. To avoid the inevitable “what’s his name” replies ... he’s called Brian, hence outing.
He’s 6 weeks old and friends and family seem unable to call him by his actual name. They make up stupid names for him “baby Bobo” for example, I’ve had people literally snigger when I say his name. MIL has outright told us it’s an awful name for a baby and she can’t say it without laughing.
I’ve told DH I’m getting to the point where I feel if people can’t call him by his name maybe they shouldn’t be seeing him?! He thinks this is an overreaction and that I’m being too dramatic. They are going to make him grow up hating his own name.
AIBU?

People call babies cutesy names all the time. That's the norm. It's nothing to do with your choice to call him Brian. Your MIL is a rude bitch. And the posters on this thread? What the fuck? I bet you wouldn't say that to OP face

My mum died a couple of days after I got engaged. DH hadn't met any family or friends until her funeral. Without exception they all referred to me by my childhood pet name (much to DH's amusement). I was 35. So he might be a Bobo for life!

My baby granddaughter has a normal, non-controversial name, but we still use nicknames for her, so I wouldn't worry about that.

Lots of the old names are coming back into fashion (I know a Stanley, a Sidney and an Olive all born in the last 6 months) but I think Brian is a name from the 50s/60s so not yet due a revival. I don't think The Life of Brian helps either, as in it the name denotes a dull, unremarkable nobody.

[quote Quincie]@Bagamoyo1
It's 41 years since The Life of Brian come out - I really don't think it has influenced people today.[/quote]
It’s a generational thing. I’m in my 50s and many people may age will associate the name Brian with that film. My Dad is called Brian so it’s a name I’ve been aware of all my life, but I’d still think of the film if I heard a child called Brian.

Baby Brian sounds awesome. People are rude wankers.
Monty python will get less and less relevant as he gets older, I wouldn't worry about that.

It’s just the ‘wrong’ stage in the naming trends cycle to use Brian — it’s not a timeless classic like Edward or Thomas, and not from long enough ago, so we all know Brians in their 50s and 60s. It will of course eventually, when that generation of Brians has died off, lose those ‘older man in slacks’ connotations and be revived, but probably not for another 20 years. At the moment, it’s like calling a baby Nigel, Malcolm, Bernard, Marjorie, Barbara, Edna etc.

To those not from the UK, surely you can think of equivalent names in your own culture that would sit strangely on a baby born in 2031?

It is normal to call babies pet names but if someone doing that has also expressed dislike of the baby's name it does come across that they're using a pet name to avoid saying the real name.

People will get used to it OP. My (English) Dad's side of the family didn't like my name, I was named after my (Welsh) mother's maternal great grandmother. My paternal grandmother complained when told my name. She and the family soon got used to it.

After a while Brian will grow into his name and they won't be able to imagine him as anything else.

Put the film on, you've got a pre-made lullaby! No need to calm him yourself!

2021!!

It's a traditional name with a personal connection to you, OP. It is obviously rude to criticise it and actually there is no reason to. It is his name and very soon no one will question it. Poor you.
As far as baby names are concerned I do think that that is normal. It is really common to talk to babies in that way. My DC have all had multiple pet names .

Wow, possibly some of the most judgemental replies I've ever seen.

People who can't use your child's name because they view it as old-fashioned, but not old-fashioned enough yet to be in vogue, are incredibly narrow minded.

As other posters have already said, old people names such as Reggie, Teddy, Alfie, Archie, Nell, Isla, Iris, Maggie, Tess etc are in vogue. Only a decade ago these names would have been laughed at.

My ex's DF died during my pregnancy 20 years ago. He was adamant the baby would be called after his DF. The name was bad enough, but the shortened version which he was known by was worse. I stood my ground and yet, within 5 years that name was fashionable again!

I worked with a teenage Beryl in the 90s, I really thought it was a joke when we introduced. I also struggled not to laugh at a baby called Julie. The latter was named after a deceased relative. That's stopped me in my tracks. Who am I to judge?
An acquaintance's new gc has the middle name Sharon. It's a has a really sad significance behind it.

I wouldn't be surprised if the Brians and Tracys have their revival. We absolutely pissed ourselves in primary in the 70s when an Emily joined our class!

Brian is a pretty unpopular name isn't it?

No, not really. It’s quite popular if you look at the over 50’s set, lots of Brian’s. If you look at under that, not so much and people will definitely look twice at a baby, young child, older child with that name.

I would use Brian the Lion when talking to a baby/child named Brian as it works. Just Brian, not so much and I can see why people are struggling tbh. If I couldn’t use Brian the Lion, I’d just go generic ‘how are you today, don’t you look cute’ style without putting in the name.

Well done for being the first to renew the popularity of Brian.

I will bet my house there is never, ever, a time when Brian becomes popular.

It wasn’t even a popular/nice name 30/40/50 years ago

Life of Brian was so called because it was already name of ridicule then!

Knowing someone who was a nice enough bloke decades ago with the same name doesn’t mean it’s a good name for a baby in 2021!
Poor baby Brian

I'm Brian and so is my wife

Why would anyone think it’s ok to be rude to someone who has called their child Brian? Which by the way, is a completely normal name, they haven’t called their baby Princess Consuela Banana Hammock or something like that... Honestly, why do people even care? If someone said to me their new baby is called Brian I’d be like okay, good to know, congratulations. And then I’d get on with my life. Why would I care?

We’re not talking about name preferences, but about showing an ounce of respect to someone who has different tastes in names. YANBU OP, there is no reason why they should be this rude about it. Nicknames for babies are common, but constantly telling you they don’t like your son’s name, is a bit much.

Nobody's being mean about the name Brian, it's just not fashionable. Like calling your baby Sandra or Neil.

It's not in fashion, so nobody associates it with small children, they associate it with middle aged or old people. That's why they're sniggering. I'm really baffled why OP is surprised about that.

As for the nicknames... That happens whatever the baby is called, I think, and it's generally just people being nice! But you could ask them not to if you wanted? I'd find it a bit PFB if someone said "oh please don't refer to Brian as 'Bri-bri', we only use his name" though.

Absolutely nothing wrong with the name Brian, can't believe people on here are so rude. I would just ignore people irl & continue to call him by his name to them. They will eventually cop on & start to use it. Dont let them get to you & definitely don't consider changing it based on some randomers on the internet not liking it.

People are rude but let’s face it your MIL isn’t wrong is she. Poor baby Brian.

My first reaction was to snigger at baby Brian, then I thought about it and Brian sounds almost identical to Ryan which is one of my favourite names.

There was a Brian in high school in the year above me (I'm 30). Nobody really commented on it then as far as I know. He will grow into the name.

My DD was born in 2014 and has quite a "90s" name, maybe even 80s. It's fine, a few pulled faces when she was a baby but it really suits her and nobody ever says anything now.

I think banning family from seeing him is a bit much though.

What's the problem with Brian? Sounds like a normal name to me. It makes me think of Brian in Family Guy, I suppose, but that's not really an issue, as you could say the same about Peter, Lois, Meg or Chris, and I don't think any of those names need to be laughed at either.

It's really unpleasant of your family to be so rude about your child's name. Even if it was something ridiculous, it's very spiteful and nasty behaviour to openly mock a child's name like this.

My niece has a name which I find ridiculous. I won't say it because it's very outing, and I know my SIL is on here, but I can assure you that it raises a lot of eyebrows, and several friends of mine have genuinely thought that I was joking when I told them her name. I wouldn't dream of laughing at her and telling my SIL that I couldn't say her name because it's so funny.

I honestly would be spending less time with them. If they're prepared to openly mock him and laugh about his name, then they will be unkind about other things too. He doesn't need shitty people like that in his life.

Aww op I understand my youngest has an unusual name and I got raised eyebrows and "your calling him what"
The main thing is do you and dp like the name?
That's all that matters fwiw I like brian he will probably be the only one in his class.

@Member984815

Why is Brian a controversial choice, it's fairly common name where I am from especially in my generation

I'm baffled as well. People are so rude, I'd like to know their names.

Poor baby Brian

Why? The only reason he’d be made fun of, is because idiot parents like the posters on this thread would mock his name in front of their children, thinking they’re funny and they know best. Then the kids go into school and do the same - but only because they saw their parents do it. You ask a 5 year old what they think of Brian, they’re not going to say ‘it’s old fashioned’.

The world out there is also very big, and I can assure you no one outside the UK would bat an eyelid at Brian. Not that it makes a difference where you are, when it comes to respecting someone else’s choice and not being rude to them or their child.